Caregiver to husband with Alzheimers
3 or 4 or more times a day my LO is so worried about his money and he wants to know how much he has in the bank so he can go get a drink. What can I do or say without being so frustrated to change the direction of the conversation?
Comments
-
welcome to the forum. You probably can’t. Repetitive questions are part of the disease and can be very frustrating to the caregiver. Fixation on money is also really common. It may or may not be possible to redirect him to another topic.
to learn about dementia, there’s a good book called The 36 Hour Day. Also if you look to the right of this page under Quick Links and Groups, there’s a group for new members with a lot of good information including another quick read called “Understanding the Dementia Experience.” These may help you.is he going for drinks? The mixture of dementia and alcohol can be really toxic. Hopefully you can control his access, but this can be quite difficult. There are a number of posts here on similar topics. If you read a lot of threads, you can learn a lot. You’ve come to a good place for advice and support.
1 -
Click on the link above for this important approach to validate their feelings before redirecting and distracting. The late Naomi Feil developed this compassionate therapy technique and there are videos available.
Below is a powerpoint format with a few slides that summarize the theory, why, and how to use it.
0 -
Thanks for posting this education, BW.
Iris
1 -
My pleasure. I learned about it here, and it has helped so much!
0 -
Adding link to new caregivers group.
1 -
Like M1 said, it's very common. Great reading suggestions have been provided. The one thing I would add is around patience. It's hard to hear the same questions over and over. The mantra I say to myself to help is "he's not giving you a hard time; he's having a hard time." All the best to you.
3
Commonly Used Abbreviations
DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more
Categories
- All Categories
- 462 Living With Alzheimer's or Dementia
- 233 I Am Living With Alzheimer's or Other Dementia
- 229 I Am Living With Younger Onset Alzheimer's
- 13.9K Supporting Someone Living with Dementia
- 5.2K I Am a Caregiver (General Topics)
- 6.7K Caring For a Spouse or Partner
- 1.8K Caring for a Parent
- 150 Caring Long Distance
- 103 Supporting Those Who Have Lost Someone
- 11 Discusiones en Español
- 2 Vivir con Alzheimer u Otra Demencia
- 1 Vivo con Alzheimer u Otra Demencia
- 1 Vivo con Alzheimer de Inicio Más Joven
- 9 Prestación de Cuidado
- 2 Soy Cuidador (Temas Generales)
- 6 Cuidar de un Padre
- 22 ALZConnected Resources
- View Discussions For People Living with Dementia
- View Discussions for Caregivers
- Discusiones en Español
- Browse All Discussions
- Dementia Resources
- 6 Account Assistance
- 16 Help