Suggestions PLEASE

Christalmas

Hello everyone! This my first post, as a matter of fact, this is the first time I am dealing with someone with dementia. I am overwhelmed to say the least.
I recently came to stay at a shelter, as I lost my house. This was 2 months ago. It's a small shelter, at present, there is just myself and another person, who has obvious dementia. Before this, I had never met this lady. I have never been a caregiver, never wanted to be. Here I am. I have researched a bit about the
disease and how to care for someone with it. She is not able, the thought processes are not there for her to care for herself, to cook, shower, clean, laundry, and is incontinent. It seems from what I have found in my research, she is easily stage 5ish? She shadows me constantly. In the evening, it seems she may have no concept of time, though this is an observation from last night, so it could have been a fluke.
I know very little about her. I know she has a son, who is very uninvolved. I know she needs to be in some kind of full time care but, that isn't able to happen nearly as quickly as need be.
What this boils down too, is that at times, I feel resentful, angered by things she has done, annoyed and frustrated. I've also felt very depressed and down on myself because those feelings are not typical of me. I don't know how to care for her properly and there is only so much I can do legally anyway. I do know though, that, it is the disease, not her, that she does the things she does. I am empathetic to that or I wouldn't be doing all that I do. I even pay for all the food for meals because she doesn't have the thought process to contribute and sometimes she thinks she's in a place that should be providing for her. I don't mind it, I'm ok with it.
All in all, I just would like a few suggestions on how to help her and myself at the same time. Thank You all in advance!

SDianeL

Sorry you are in the position to feel responsible for her. who runs the shelter? Speak to them and they should get her help. The court can appoint someone to be her guardian or make her a ward of the state so she can get help. If she has Medicaid they will place her in a facility. Look up the center for aging in your area. Be easy on yourself. Being a caregiver isn’t easy. She’s lucky to have you.

sandwichone123

What an amazingly kind heart! Thank you for sharing this story! I don't have any suggestions, as everyone that should be caring for her has apparently checked out. I hope any of us in need could find such support from a stranger.

SusanB-dil

She is blessed you are around and watching out for her. You are dealing with so much already. I agree, to see if you can get social-services involved.

Christalmas

Thank You all for your kind words, it's much appreciated.

The shelter staff is doing what they can but, without a power of attorney or family involvement, hands are tied. They have called APS and DSHS and gotten a case started but, apparently the system is backlogged so much, it won't be until September before she can even be seen.