In home care recommendations

MaryD99

Hello! I’m new to this forum. I’m supporting my dad who is sole caregiver for my stepmom who has dementia - I’m not sure what stage she’s in but the disease has progressed to point where it’s getting too much for my elderly dad to take care of her on his own.

He’s struggling with accepting her true progression and knowing how to navigate her care and so myself and other family members are trying to help even more than we had to do research and provide direct support.

We are hoping to convince my dad to get some form of in home support to give himself a reprieve and provide extra care for my stepmom. I’m starting to do research to be able to present back to my dad some options and help ease the process along.

I’ve got two questions for the group. First is I’ve gotten a list of in home care providers after calling the Alz.org hotline and it’s hard to discern which may be most reliable and good fit by just reading their websites. Curious if folks have recommendations for how best to narrow down - does this take calling each and doing some phone consultations to start? Are there good ways to get word of mouth recommendations- my folks live in the Pittsburgh area.

My second question is if folks have had experience with in home care that stays over night and helps dementia patients who have trouble sleeping. This is the #1 issue they’re facing and we found a new doctor to see if we can get better clinical support and direction. We haven’t found a good solution yet and the situation is beyond untenable. I was thinking if we could get in home care to watch and get my stepmom thru the evenings even if just a few days a week that will at least let my dad get some sleep. It’s a horrible situation! :-(

Appreciate the advice and support from others living thru this! Sometimes reading articles just doesn’t feel helpful enough.

SDianeL

when I chose a memory care facility, I read online reviews and narrowed to 3. Then I visited each one with my daughter to select one. With in home care once you select the agency you should interview the caregiver and the first time they come be there with them to evaluate how they do & how your parents react to the person. Make a list of questions. The agency usually sends a nurse to evaluate the needs of the patient.

M1

Welcome to the forum. I agree completely that in home care or even memory care may be warranted, but also wanted to comment that sleep fragmentation is very much part of the disease and may respond well to medication,. seroquel has worked very well for my partner in this regard and you may want to ask about it. It won't work take away the need for help completely but may make the situation more tenable for everyone.

FTDCaregiver1

I use in-home care for my DW. On your 2 questions, I'm in a rural area so options were limited. They came out to do an assessment, was able to ask alot of questions more in line with matching the right caregiver for DW. Been a great experience, have one primary caregiver who's great and bonded well with DW. On overnights, I have that in-home respite option as well, but not for the reasons you mention, agree with M1 on medications to aid sleep. I've done that as well with DW and have a bed-time routine I stick with to get her to sleep, as she progressed well into stage 6, nearing 7, she gets to bed and stays asleep now pretty much every night, wasn't that way for a long time though. Have the occasional late night, but not near as bad as it used to be. In-home respite care allows me to stay away overnight for short trips and such, huge for me and I don't freak out worrying any more as I've got a good care worker I trust.

clarinetist

maryD99,

I used a geriatric care manager to find both in-home care and a memory care. She was able to recommend the best options for my area. It’s expensive, but was well worth the fee for me.