Facebook reel is not appropriate

Quilting brings calm

I’m just going to vent here because I’m sure not going to vent there. If you have Facebook, you know there are public reels that show up on your feed - mostly cute little snippets- gender reveals, military homecomings, new puppies etc.

Some middle aged man has been putting up reels of his elderly father with dementia. It’s definitely not to educate. Because he spends a lot of time trying to have logical discussions with his father. There’s no redirect or fibbing. It’s all ‘no dad, we sold your house - don’t you remember’ over and over, Similar repetitive conversations with other topics. No ‘hey watchers - here’s what the right thing to do here is.

Why do this to your parent? Display him like this? If you want your family to see your dad like this, then send it to them. Not on public reels. Bruce Willis’s family talks about him a lot- but not in specifics and they don’t show video of him.

addy103

I know the guy you are talking about. He says he does it to show what it is like to others.

Victoriaredux

From news clips he says it's to raise money to keep his father out of a care home.

Too bad parents can't go back in time and monetized our stupid teenage years , right?

sandwichone123

His poor dad would be better off in a care home where he could be treated with respect.

harshedbuzz

@Quilting brings calm

Did you report it? There have been a number of incidents in which I have had to report bullying on FB and other platforms that have resulted in content being removed and posters being disciplined— usually a short stay in Facebook jail.

https://www.facebook.com/help/792789031380809/

HB

JeriLynn66

He has 126k followers on FB. Kind of a mini "reality show" but always with the same thing. Arguing and correcting. He was or is an attorney, his brother lives nearby and I forget what his occupation was.

Quilting brings calm

The reels I saw did not have anything to do with monetizing anything. A couple of them have the son make a comment for the camera - but most of them just had the dad on camera. He’s frail, hard of hearing, and definitely doesn’t know what really is going on in his life or that he is being filmed. I just find it sad that someone thinks this is entertainment.

With that many followers, I doubt Facebook will do anything- but I will see if there’s a report option.

Jarmac

I have seen that reel. Disgusting

GothicGremlin

That is just horrible. 🙁

Too bad parents can't go back in time and monetized our stupid teenage years , right?

So glad I was a teen way back in the day before social media, surveillance cameras, phone cameras, and email. Saved myself years of mortification.

harshedbuzz

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/224889#Comment_224889

I posted the link above where you can easily report the offending content. I can't speak to whether Meta (he probably cross posts on Instagram as well) will remove it, but they did several times when I reached out a few years ago.

AlzWife2023

I followed the account you’re describing for a while…it’s Dan Salinger. I found his and his wife’s behavior toward the father to be so upsetting and inappropriate. It seems like it should be illegal since the father can’t really give consent. The son, Dan Salinger says he quit being a lawyer to start this social media career. I’m sure he’s making money from this. There are so many videos of Dan telling his father “your brother Bill died 30 years ago.” “Your second wife died of cancer.” Each time Ed, the dad, is shocked and hurt then asks his own age, etc. where he lives etc. It’s so cruel.

Ed is a retired podiatrist 90+ and his other son Mark —also from his first marriage —who shuns the camera— is also a podiatrist. Ed lives between the two sons’ houses on a rotating basis of four days each, I believe. He has other children including a young man in his 30s from his second wife. I don’t think he remembers that kid. Dan Salinger sells t-shirts with his father’s phrases printed on them like “Where’s my wallet.” He sells hats, too. People send them gifts. Dan loves all the attention. It was interesting to see at first, to feel not so alone and to see how families share the caregiving, but the shouting, dismissiveness, and lack of compassion were very upsetting. Many people leave comments about what a great caregiver Dan is and others suggest fibbing etc & they are ignored.

AlzWife2023

check out this article about the Salingers https://www.alzheimersblog.org/2024/06/10/finding-purpose-a-familys-story-of-a-son-caring-for-his-dad-with-dementia/

housefinch

@AlzWife2023 that’s awful. My jaw dropped just reading about the t shirts. Much less the cruel answers about lost loved ones. I read the article and am not impressed by Dan’s new self, as he describes it. Yikes.

AlzWife2023

I just did a dive into his Instagram and he's not making money from t-shirts but commercials … since he has 287K followers on Instagram and 2.1 million followers on TikTok!.

Carl46

About 65 years ago, I saw a pair of conjoined twins on display at a county fair. About a year old, they writhed about in a glass case while lines of people looked at them. I imagine that would get their father arrested now, but social media is pretty much unregulated.

AlzWife2023

Very sad