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Facebook reel is not appropriate

Quilting brings calm
Quilting brings calm Member Posts: 2,557
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I’m just going to vent here because I’m sure not going to vent there. If you have Facebook, you know there are public reels that show up on your feed - mostly cute little snippets- gender reveals, military homecomings, new puppies etc.

Some middle aged man has been putting up reels of his elderly father with dementia. It’s definitely not to educate. Because he spends a lot of time trying to have logical discussions with his father. There’s no redirect or fibbing. It’s all ‘no dad, we sold your house - don’t you remember’ over and over, Similar repetitive conversations with other topics. No ‘hey watchers - here’s what the right thing to do here is.

Why do this to your parent? Display him like this? If you want your family to see your dad like this, then send it to them. Not on public reels. Bruce Willis’s family talks about him a lot- but not in specifics and they don’t show video of him.

Comments

  • addy103
    addy103 Member Posts: 18
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    I know the guy you are talking about. He says he does it to show what it is like to others.

  • Victoriaredux
    Victoriaredux Member Posts: 131
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    From news clips he says it's to raise money to keep his father out of a care home.

    Too bad parents can't go back in time and monetized our stupid teenage years , right?

  • sandwichone123
    sandwichone123 Member Posts: 797
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    His poor dad would be better off in a care home where he could be treated with respect.

  • harshedbuzz
    harshedbuzz Member Posts: 4,576
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    @Quilting brings calm

    Did you report it? There have been a number of incidents in which I have had to report bullying on FB and other platforms that have resulted in content being removed and posters being disciplined— usually a short stay in Facebook jail.

    https://www.facebook.com/help/792789031380809/

    HB

  • JeriLynn66
    JeriLynn66 Member Posts: 883
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    He has 126k followers on FB. Kind of a mini "reality show" but always with the same thing. Arguing and correcting. He was or is an attorney, his brother lives nearby and I forget what his occupation was.

  • Quilting brings calm
    Quilting brings calm Member Posts: 2,557
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    The reels I saw did not have anything to do with monetizing anything. A couple of them have the son make a comment for the camera - but most of them just had the dad on camera. He’s frail, hard of hearing, and definitely doesn’t know what really is going on in his life or that he is being filmed. I just find it sad that someone thinks this is entertainment.

    With that many followers, I doubt Facebook will do anything- but I will see if there’s a report option.

  • Jarmac
    Jarmac Member Posts: 26
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    I have seen that reel. Disgusting

  • GothicGremlin
    GothicGremlin Member Posts: 870
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    That is just horrible. 🙁

    Too bad parents can't go back in time and monetized our stupid teenage years , right?

    So glad I was a teen way back in the day before social media, surveillance cameras, phone cameras, and email. Saved myself years of mortification.

  • harshedbuzz
    harshedbuzz Member Posts: 4,576
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    I posted the link above where you can easily report the offending content. I can't speak to whether Meta (he probably cross posts on Instagram as well) will remove it, but they did several times when I reached out a few years ago.

  • AlzWife2023
    AlzWife2023 Member Posts: 326
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    I followed the account you’re describing for a while…it’s Dan Salinger. I found his and his wife’s behavior toward the father to be so upsetting and inappropriate. It seems like it should be illegal since the father can’t really give consent. The son, Dan Salinger says he quit being a lawyer to start this social media career. I’m sure he’s making money from this. There are so many videos of Dan telling his father “your brother Bill died 30 years ago.” “Your second wife died of cancer.” Each time Ed, the dad, is shocked and hurt then asks his own age, etc. where he lives etc. It’s so cruel.

    Ed is a retired podiatrist 90+ and his other son Mark —also from his first marriage —who shuns the camera— is also a podiatrist. Ed lives between the two sons’ houses on a rotating basis of four days each, I believe. He has other children including a young man in his 30s from his second wife. I don’t think he remembers that kid. Dan Salinger sells t-shirts with his father’s phrases printed on them like “Where’s my wallet.” He sells hats, too. People send them gifts. Dan loves all the attention. It was interesting to see at first, to feel not so alone and to see how families share the caregiving, but the shouting, dismissiveness, and lack of compassion were very upsetting. Many people leave comments about what a great caregiver Dan is and others suggest fibbing etc & they are ignored.

  • housefinch
    housefinch Member Posts: 429
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    @AlzWife2023 that’s awful. My jaw dropped just reading about the t shirts. Much less the cruel answers about lost loved ones. I read the article and am not impressed by Dan’s new self, as he describes it. Yikes.

  • AlzWife2023
    AlzWife2023 Member Posts: 326
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    edited October 8

    I just did a dive into his Instagram and he's not making money from t-shirts but commercials … since he has 287K followers on Instagram and 2.1 million followers on TikTok!.

  • Carl46
    Carl46 Member Posts: 261
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    About 65 years ago, I saw a pair of conjoined twins on display at a county fair. About a year old, they writhed about in a glass case while lines of people looked at them. I imagine that would get their father arrested now, but social media is pretty much unregulated.

  • AlzWife2023
    AlzWife2023 Member Posts: 326
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    Very sad

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more