From Maybe to Reality

Maru

DH in ES thought. Then, several episodes of mis-rememering, including asking our adult son if he remembered a certain episode from his (DH's) youth. For the past 3 weeks he has been just fine, more or less, just the occasional lost word. In my mind I knew he still had Alz, but it just seemed like , well, maybe it will be a long time before it manifests itself in ugly ways.

Last night, as we were getting ready for bed, he left the bathroom without brushing his teeth and, so, I gently called reminded him. He said he had done so earlier, when I knew for a fact he had not been back in that part of the house all evening. I checked his toothbrush…dry. I told him it was dry and he became somewhat defensive and arugmenative, and said "I dried it." Because of all the reading I have done on dementia, I knew better than to argue and this once was not so critical. (My literal brain kept trying to figure out how one would go about drying a tooth brush).

Looking back over that day, I remembered several times where he couldn't find the words he was looking for, the several times he had lost what he was talking about. He had screwed up his budgeting spread sheet on the computer. Yesterday, ALZ moved back into our house.

Here is a funny thing that has happened in all of this. We have been married 65 years and I my love for him over the years has become a decision more than a feeling. But, since he was diagnosed back in June, I have fallen in love with him again. I don't understand it at all. We were like two old comfortable shoes living together. His love for me has changed as well, or at least it is more expressive. Has anyone else had a similar thing happen?

Carl46

I have had the same experience. My wife hugs me frequently, tells me she loves me, and thanks me for helping her. Very different from her behavior in middle age. More like when we were first married, actually. I don't if she has forgotten the things I did that she didn't like, or if I'm treating her differently now. Probably both.

Ronk246

My DW is early/mid stage three, we have been married 56 years. We have always been affectionate, but since her diagnosis two and a half years ago, our relationship has become even more loving to each other. She is always calm and appreciative of everything I do for her, (which is almost everything). By comparison, I have a good friend whose DW has become extremely combative, screaming and yelling at her husband for no reason.. He is researching MC facilities, with no support from her GP, who continues to deny any problem with his DW's issues. What a horrific disease! God Bless Us All.

Maru

This is such an odd disease. DH did so well for 3 weeks…seemed normal. Ever since the night when he "dried" his toothbrush, I am seeing more and more things…No need to list them. You all have your own ever-increasing things that you see. It is always such a surprise to me…normal, then out of the blue…not normal. I am so reminded of a failing or loose light bulb. (In fact, I have one in the room that I am currently in and haven't bothered to change it yet).