Mom stopped walking, starting hospice consultation

MoniqueV2024

I’m exhausted.

Mom moved in with us 2.5 months ago. We rehabilitated her after a failed rehab stay following a hospitalization. But she’s declining.

Hospice support sounds promising because I need more help. She stopped walking today due to intense pain in her bad hip, but she also shuffles/drags her feet so maybe it’s just too strenuous in every way to walk.

I am dreading this week and just wish I could get the hospice care started.

Looking for advice because all of this continues to be new territory. Just as soon as I think I figure something out, her condition changes.

NizhoniGrrl

I would talk to her doctors/providers and ask for an assessment for hospice. They might also do a fresh cognitive assessment as well. I know this isn’t easy! Sometimes they also just give up, dementia or not, when they are ready to go.

harshedbuzz

@MoniqueV2024

I think hospice could be helpful for you and your mom at this time. You don't need to talk to her doctors about this; you can self-refer and call hospice for an evaluation yourself. Some folks like to interview at least 2 hospice companies as they can vary a bit in offerings. If you know folks who've used hospice, they may have suggestions on who is best available in your area.

It's hard to say whether your mom's mobility issue is pain related or if it's the disease progression. Since the brain controls movement, it's typical to see shuffling and leaning and eventually the loss of the ability to ambulate/bear weight at all.

Hospice is generally very good about pain management and comfort. They'll send a bath aide twice weekly, and you'll have nursing visits. They may offer pastoral care and other services but it's not the same as a home health aide who covers a shift to give you a break as a rule. Some hospices do have volunteers who provide this but it's not typical. There is respite in a facility after a time but we didn't get that far.

HB

Shenmama99

we are getting closer to hospice as well. At the moment I have a palliative care nurse practitioner visit once a month. It was the step we took before hospice. From some of my moms signs she is declining as well. I was given the name of a Hospice place from a nurse. The meeting with the director was extremely positive and reassuring. Hospice will be able to give you the much needed support and you can get away from your house for a few hours. They can also help with bathing. That has been a struggle for me. It’s always such a huge discussion to convince her she needs to be clean. We are also dealing with chronic UTI’s. Anyway, hang in there. This really sucks and is hard but it will end eventually. It’s just crappy watching a loved one lose their memories. I feel like I am already grieving the loss of my mom. She’s not the same as she was so I feel like she’s already gone. But at this time this is my life. I can deal with it through the strength of God.