Diagnosis process

hml05

Hello all,

I was able to get my mother to be seen by a neuropsychologist for testing recently, which required very careful persuasion and lying to get her there. They now want to make an appointment to go over the results with her. I am considering not doing this and having them just send me the report, if I can get it. My mom has no idea that she has any memory or thinking or behavioral problems. She gets very agitated and has an explosive temper that has escalated to slapping me last week and threatening to kill me. She screamed and yelled at me during the drive home after the 2 neurology visits that she has already had. Since she does not remember the neurology appointments and any testing that has been done and she lacks any ability to make sound decisions, is there any reason that I should put her and myself through more distress with this next appointment? I do have medical poa, but they refuse to talk with just me.

Thank you in advance for any advice and help!

hiya

I’m so sorry you are in this club. It is such a difficult place to be.
it is important to get results. I would tell them about the safety issue of driving with your mum and her explosive temper. If they won’t talk to you alone, maybe with your information on behaviors (don’t sugar anything), and their results, they will be able to prescribe your mum some medicine to help with her temper and anxiety. After that, you may both be able to go. Remember, your safety is important.

ShannonBlakely

Hi! I am new here. Just joined. I am in the midst of trying to find a neuropsychologist that is on my mom's insurance to do the testing. Did insurance cover the test?

CoralRN

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/72909/diagnosis-process

Just a few thoughts - Can the results be given over the phone? Maybe they can do a telehealth visit. Can you see her electronic medical records? Sorry you are dealing with this.

hml05

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/241940#Comment_241940

I tried calling today, but it did not go well. They will not let me speak with the Dr. at all. They said the doctor is extremely busy, but they will leave a message with her regarding me wanting to talk to her before the appointment. The person on the phone kept reiterating that they can't discuss the results with me and I kept reiterating back to her that I wasn't wanting the results, but want to discuss how to prepare for the visit and my concerns for the explosive outbursts. I have suffered an enormous amount of emotional and mental abuse from my mom, and her getting physical with me was the last straw. I refuse to put myself in a situation that I know will likely cause me more trauma. Unfortunately like I said though, I can't even get the doctor on the phone to address this. It is so frustrating. It's like trying to take care of an adult with the reasoning and logic skills of a 3 year old with adult size tantrums.

SDianeL

The neuropsychology testing will only confirm cognitive impairment. Having the results won’t help or change anything. I would have them nail the results and you get the mail. She needs a Geriatric Psychiatrist to prescribe medication for anxiety and agitation. If you feel threatened or unsafe, have her taken to the hospital and tell them she can’t be released because you don’t feel safe with her. We know how frustrating it is to get help for her if she refuses.

hml05

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/241955#Comment_241955

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/241955#Comment_241955

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/241955#Comment_241955

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/241947#Comment_241947

hml05

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/241947#Comment_241947

I apologize for the late reply. I'll be honest, I'm not sure if her insurance covered the testing. I will keep you posted though when I find out.

SDianeL

I would contact the insurance company to find out. A referral may be necessary. I would get pre-approval in writing if required.

lisn2cats

I am slightly jealous that you got your mom to the neuropsychologist. I have tried all the tricks offered here - fiblets, promises of good things, etc. She has enough wherewithall and suspicion to figure out some of my fiblets … or maybe I'm just not good at them! While my mom has not been physically violent toward me (other than throwing things on the floor in a heated state), she does occasionally explode in a rage over minor things that just hit her the wrong way. Just what did you say to convince her to go? I'll try anything!

So….I thought that POA gives the holder the right to access medical records? Maybe I've just been lucky so far. Someone mentioned beating your mom to the mailbox. I do that though her mail doesn't get delivered directly to her door, which makes it easier. I (or a neighbor) goes to the box and take out anything that looks official, leaving junk mail or general notices so she has the satisfaction of being independent and managing her mail.

If I"m reading some of the messages correctly, the diagnosis is just that…my mom would still need to agree to see a geriatric psychologist and/or take meds (most likely anti-depressants or something for anxiety)?

H1235

A diagnosis is just a diagnosis, but she still needs to be treated for the symptoms. If she doesn’t go back how will you get the medication she needs for the anger? My mom’s neurologist was more willing to prescribe this type of medication than her pcp. Others have said the opposite. If you do take her and she does not take the news well, don’t cover it up or try to hide it, bring it to their attention. If she shows any signs of violence in the office, waiting room refuse to take her home! She may need some time in a geriatric psych hospital to figure out medications. Tell them you can’t safely drive her in this condition (true). Let the neurologist and staff figure out what needs to be done. Police would probably bring her to hospital for an evaluation and then hopefully transfer her to geriatric psych. If you’re in the parking lot or on the road when she gets mad, pull over and call 911 right a way. So sorry you are going through this.

harshedbuzz

I'd keep the appointment and let the chips fall where they may.

Your mom is struggling which is causing her behavior to be volatile and violent. If she loses it in-office, the psychologist can help get her transferred to a geri-psych unit for medication management during a short stay. If not, you may need to wait until she does react and have her transported yourself. After she's in a less reactive emotional state, you can probably bring her home safely.

My dad was super pissed to be told he had dementia and was pretty badly behaved. As sometimes happens, the emotional weight of this information was something he remembered. We used his anger at his neurologist, to get him in to see a geripsych framing the appointment as a "second opinion".

HB

JulietteBee

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/72909/diagnosis-process

I am so sorry to hear of your experience with your mom.

Question for you, have you already submitted your mom's POA to the office or have you just told the staff over the phone?

The whole purpose of her having prepared one is so that practitioners know that they have been given authority to discuss her health with you. However, they may want to review it before having further discussions with you.

I'd suggest you fax it to them then call to let them know you submitted it for the doctor & repeat your request that you be called.

SusanB-dil

If at any time you feel threatened, you can call 9-1-1, explain the situation, and have them take her to a geri-psych facility. They should be more equipped to get a handle on the meds. Agree - do make sure her doc's office has your POA and HIPAA accesses correctly in their system. If necessary, you may have to document via your phone of her behavior so you can show them on next visit.