Books, and thermostats

HollyBerry

Two questions today…

Suggestions, please: My partner has always been a big reader, though she hasn't been able to follow a story (on tv or by reading) for a couple years now. She always wants to carry a book with her and does sort of read it. Everything we have at home has been deemed "too negative," or "not interesting" or "this is stupid." I would love to find something she would sort of enjoy… criteria: large enough print, not the tiny print used in older paperbacks; fairly simple language and plot but not childish; no violent mysteries or sappy romances; doesn't get fantasy or scifi. I've tried Rita Mae Brown's cat mysteries, various classic horse stories, James Herriot, dog mysteries — these were somewhat successful. Short stories would be a logical fit, magazines would seem to be a fit but she doesn't like them, says newspapers are too negative. Any suggestions? Authors, genres, anything?! We spend a ridiculous amount of time finding a book, rejecting that book, finding a different book, rejecting that book, getting more books, returning unread books to the library, etc.

Next question: household thermostat technology. Without going full-on app-controlled, is there anything I can do to keep her from turning the heat on in June? I was outside doing yard work yesterday and she turned on the heat in the middle of the day with all the doors and windows open; thank goodness it probably never actually kicked on. Is there a childproof thermostat available?

thanks!

jehjeh

I'm sorry I have no book recommendations but regarding the heat. Could you just shut off the breaker without her knowing? She will have the satisfaction of turning up the thermostat but the heat won't come on.

harshedbuzz

@HollyBerry

We dealt with both these issues.

For the thermostat, we went to a smart thermostat that he couldn't understand when the new HVAC was installed. Before that, he'd set the heat to "Emergency/85F" in July. It was hell. Other suggestions we were given was the old-fashioned Plexiglas lock-box and moving the thermostat to a different location and leaving the current one in place but disconnected.

We never did find a good solution to books. Dad loved to read pre-dementia and retained the ability to decode English well into the late stages of the disease. That said, he had no real comprehension as his short-term memory couldn't hold a thought from paragraph to paragraph. This resulted in much complaining that DH and I purposely sent him boring books as an insult. When he read new books by favorite authors he complained they'd "lost their touch". If he reread something he enjoyed previously, he'd complain it wasn't "as good as I remember". The only book I recall him enjoying was a copy of Roz Chast's Can't We Talk About Something More Pleasant? a friend had given me. The memoir is about having elderly parents and is told in a series cartoons. Dad identified with the author and didn't recognize himself as the challenging older parent. Oh the irony.

He continued to "read' even after he went into memory care a couple months before he died. I feel like the act was habit and a way of reminding himself of who he was. We found The Week something he could enjoy and he liked have mail addressed to him. He also would look at those locally published books with photos and histories of small towns and neighborhoods. With my aunt who lost reading fairly early on, we found coffee table (pictures of places she'd been) books a hit and also adult coloring books about topics that appealed to her— fashion and travel.

HB

sandwichone123

When my dh was at that stage, he loved the books he had loved as a teen, so you might look around for stuff that was popular when he was in high school. He could follow the plots better if the book was familiar, although he didn't actually remember the plot. He also bought a set of Hardy Boys mysteries around that time. He carried a book around for a year or more after he could no longer read, and even yesterday we spent a pleasant half-hour looking at magazines. I was surprised that he could still make out parts of some of the words.

Iris L.

Mimi S, an emeritus member, had recommended Young Adult books. The print is larger and not many pages. Seek out appropriate topics.

Iris

Dmarcotte

I would also recommend checking into young adult books. I am going to show my nerdness here, but you might want to check into Graphic Novels - they are like comic books, but longer and with more involved stories - there are some graphic novels of classic literature too.

Karl38

My wife is in Stage 5 and has not been able to read a book or follow a movie plot for a couple of years now. Surprisingly, she is able to solve wordsearch book puzzles. Occasionally she needs help but she spends several hours every day working on these puzzles. She is not very good at it and can spend an hour or more on a simple puzzle, but it holds her interest. Give it a try.

blacksparky

My DW had not been able to do word searches or read any books for quite a while but she enjoys carrying them around with her so that works for her. One suggestion for books is to look up readers digest books, they have hard copy books of best stories all together. Hope you can find a solution. 👍

Chris20cm

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/73297/books-and-thermostats

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/73297/books-and-thermostats

I think you can install a NEST thermostat and control it from your smartphone. About reading, DW can't anymore, but she loves doing adult coloring books with animal or mandala themes, and I keep hundreds of colored pencils sharpened for her.

Biggles

My DH loved to read technical books and books with yacht fittings and true stories. He can no longer read but we go to second hand book shops and find classic books with great pictures, he loves them.

Goodlife2025

you might try books by Robert Fulghum. short sweet observations & stories, large print books and always positive. Author of, Everything I ever needed to know I learned in kindergarten.

Karen711

Hi HollyBerry- two thoughts: if she likes poetry she might like to carry around and peruse any of the many Mary Oliver books. If she’s an animal lover she might like Dog Songs- it has a great cover! On the thermostat front- if you have a digital thermostat you can go through a couple of simple steps to turn it off completely. That may prevent her from successfully turning the heat up but she may complain that it’s broken. I know you said you didn’t want to use an app, but I have one now and it really does help me intervene in my wife’s wonky HVAC settings, and she never knows I’ve done anything so no complaints.
Let us know how the book thing goes!

Karen

Bluebird

I’m a librarian. The library where I work has dementia books and activities kits. Check with your local library and see if they have books or activity kits for people with dementia. Talk to the reference dept. not people at the front desk. The reference dept. is there to help find what you’re looking for. My library will also deliver the items to your home if you live in their boundaries and have someone who is home bound. Also try looking for large print books with less than 100 pages. Also try non-fiction children’s books. I would start with nature or pets. Look for books that have a photo on each page with a description under the photo.

Also ask the library if they have an employee who’s primary job is to work with home bound people. That person will be your best bet for finding books for your partner.

HollyBerry

Thanks so much, everyone! I have some great ideas of what to look for at the library this week - and which librarian to ask for help!

And we'll see what I can figure out about the thermostat. I never knew you could disable the programmable thermostats - I'll start there.

H1235

Would Chicken Soup For the Soul books work?

lindaft12

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/73297/books-and-thermostats

If you want larger print either get books for the visually impaired or a Kindle as you can adjust the print size. My DH keeps the print large on his Kindle and is a very very slow reader of his books or even a description of a show on TV. He needs simple easy to follow books for TV shows. My DH likes the house warm because he is on blood thinner but he has been warned don't touch the thermostat which he leave alone most of the time.

CMC62

My husband also loves to read and was in a book club for years. Now he has trouble holding on to the plot long enough to finish the book. I have found that non-fiction books, about subjects or people he is very familiar with are easier for him to read. His past knowledge gives what he is reading some context, even if he can't recall the last chapter. He seems excited to be able to read something he can still understand.

tucson anne

Ditto the suggestions on non-fiction. And with an area of familiarity. I go to the children's section and pick the books that are probably aimed at 6th grade; it helps to have pictures and chapters. Not sure how much my DH comprehends but he does turn the pages. His favorite is one about the Scopes monkey trial (he was a genetisist.) I also order one simplified Sherlock Holmes stories called Classic Starts The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes from Amazon. there are a few others in that series I haven't tried. Lots of the children's section animal books are good if your person likes animals.

Maru

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/245808#Comment_245808

A great idea on moving the real thermostat to another location while leaving the non-working one in place. DH has no idea of how to reset the smart thermostat but he does know how to make a temporary change, which takes hours to recover from in this Texas heat.

CarolinaWren

this thread has been very helpful. We are in the midst of a heat wave and my husband keeps using the option to temporarily turn the AC temp up. The kids and I were dying the other night. He had turned the AC temp to 85

Salliek

I was able to purchase a thermostat plastic cover that covers the thermostat, includes a key for the lock. You can maintain. Thankfully, my DH hasn’t reacted to our new plastic locked wall mounted box.

CarolinaWren

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/248920#Comment_248920

mine would be super mad. I also noticed he is keeping his bedroom window open. It’s been 100+ degrees outside. Now I know why the AC is running constantly.

l7pla1w2

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/248933#Comment_248933

Older people can have poor temperature regulation. Is it possible he actually feels cold?

HollyBerry

It was a lovely 60 degree night, great for sleeping, and this morning she wanted to put the heat on. I suggested getting dressed… sigh. She's sitting in the kitchen in slippers and wool socks, jeans and a fleece; I"m in shorts and bare feet. Yes, I think their internal thermostat is calibrated differently!

CarolinaWren

He is only 53. I believe he probably has some liver damage as well