Fear and refusal of standing/transfers?

helpingdaughter26

Prefacing with my mom seems to be in the later stages. She recently does not want to get up or stand up. In the morning, she will not want to sit up in bed. Once we get her in a sitting position, she is refusing to stand up. She would rather just sit there. When we get her up with a gait belt, she gets very angry and scared. But once she gets to the couch, she is perfectly okay. Same thing happens on the toilet, she can sit there for 20 mins and be “fine” until we ask her to stand up. We don’t know what else to do other than helping her up with a gait belt or pushing her. She seems to just lack a motivation to move. She gets so upset every time we touch her or say we are going to help lift her up. She has been sad, mean, anxious, all of the emotions. I just feel so horrible but I can’t have her sitting on the toilet for an hour or laying in her bed with needing a pull ups change. Any advice?

caregiving daughter

Sounds like you have tried gentle encouragement and I'm guessing distraction as well. Might there be a way for a psychiatrist to spend some time with your mom?

​fesk

If this is a sudden change and you haven't already, please check to see if there is an underlying medical condition - a UTI or other type of infection. My mother would not stand when she was sick and sometimes that was the only symptom - not standing- no other visible sign. When she was better, she stood again. You could also ask for PT/OT evaluation.

JulietteBee

It is possible her leg/s hurt, yet she cannot verbalize it.

SDianeL

please have her evaluated by hospice if she’s in late stage. During that time some PWD lose the ability to remember how to sit or stand depending on the area of the brain affected by the disease. It’s common in Parkinson’s dementia and LBD. They also have a fear of falling. The next step could be wheelchair or becoming bedridden. Search online for dementia caregiving video by Teepa Snow or Tam Cummings about how to get a PWD to sit or stand. I remember seeing one. It said get in front and hold their hands and tell them to stand while you gently pull them towards you. Worked for my sister.