Denial(4)

Lizzielou, welcome to the forum. Sorry you have reason to be here.

The reason he doesn't think anything is wrong is because he has anosognosia. That is the inability to realize there is a problem. You nor anyone else will make him believe he has one.

You have found a good forum to get help, help others, and have a place to put your feelings in print. People here understand.

My husband is the same - doesn't believe it, but he makes jokes about how he is becoming an "idiot".  He says he won't go to the neurologist in October after a three month wait for an appointment.  He won't do any of the brainteasers or puzzles the doctor thought might help.  He won't take the B-12 and the statin prescribed without a major argument every day.  He won't try the recommended CPAP to help him sleep better.  He won't, he won't, he won't.  So, do the best you can and try to ignore some of the denial.  Probably none of the things the doctor suggested would help in the long term, so I just take it day by day and see if I can get the meds in him, I do the puzzles and sometimes he shows an interest, and I will do the best I can to get him to the doctor in October.  Good luck!!!!!

I'm looking for advice on the appropriate composition of a care team. My 70-year-old wife is in the early stages of dementia. Early on (in another city), a geriatrician send her for blood tests (after which my wife started taking B12) and an MRI (to rule out physical causes for the memory loss). In a new city for a little over a year now, my wife sees a general practitioner, who sent my wife to see a neurologist, but who never asks my wife about her memory issues), the neurologist (who had my wife undergo a neuropsychological evaluation which formed the basis of the diagnosis of dementia, and who started my wife on donepezil, but who hasn't spoken to my wife in 3/4 of a year), and a gynecologist. My wife asked to talk to someone about the waves of depression she's experiencing, but when my wife arrived for that appointment, the social worker she was to see told my wife it would not be possible to see her until my wife could show proof of a clean COVID-19 test (but who did not arrange for the test at this supposedly comprehensive medical facility). 

My wife feels (and I agree) that she is not getting the attention or coordination of care she deserves from this team (and I use the term very loosely). It's bad enough to face the uncertainty of this diagnosis without feeling that your doctors aren't really looking out for you. Fortunately, we live in a city large enough to have a number of other medical enterprises, including a good university medical system. I'd appreciate opinions about who we should reach out to first—a general practitioner? a gerontologist?—and who we should expect will be on the team of doctors who see to her care.

Moore, you have posted onto a three year old thread. It's okay to start your own thread. The goal is not to have your PWD get it. You have to learn a new way of communicating with him. He doesn't sound like he should be left alone. Regarding your other post, you cannot "hope" that PWD will follow mom once she is in assisted living. He was anxious and afraid when she was in the hospital.

Iris

Steve posted in 2021.