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Am I Crazy?

Marp
Marp Member Posts: 170
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My sister's day care is closing in a few weeks. The owner of her day care has another location we can send her to. It's only a few miles further than the current location, but traffic is worse, making transporting her more difficult.

I've arranged transportation through an organization that provides rides to the disabled and the elderly.

Round Trip, this costs $62/day. I work so she would go five days a week. I may be able to transport her part of the time to cut costs, but we would still be paying a big bill each month.

Every time I tell people this, they say Wow! Oh my word!

It is a lot, but it's less expensive than moving her into AL or bringing in in home care every day, even for a half a day.

So I think it's a good move to try, but I worry I'm being crazy.

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  • M1
    M1 Member Posts: 6,701
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    edited May 2023

    Doesn't sound crazy at all to me Marp. Cost is a huge factor. $300 a week for transportation is far less than what AL would cost (more like $300 a day). I hope it works out.

    You know, it might be worth checking with your local Council on Aging about any possible grants or funding sources that might help cover some of the costs. Can't hurt to ask.

  • Marp
    Marp Member Posts: 170
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    Thanks M1.


    We have applied for funding through a county program. It would subsidize 20 one way trips per month, saving us about $300/month.

    Of course, this is subject to funding; this program has run out of funding midyear at times, but we'll take funding for whenever it's available.

  • Marp
    Marp Member Posts: 170
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    I sometimes feel like I'm being a schmuck because I don't want to do all the transportation to the new center. The old center was sooo easy to get her there.

    My work supervisor is willing to work with me on scheduling to allow me to transport her, but I don't want to do it every day.

  • eaglemom
    eaglemom Member Posts: 519
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    I don't think it sounds crazy at all. Clearly you like and your sister likes this day care. Keeping her happy and at a place she's familiar is huge. If you can make it happen I certainly would. If people question your decision you can ask them which days they'd like to drive her! I'm kidding, but knowing me I'd probably say something like that.

    I do think its a good idea to look into different ways to get her to the day care. The Catholic Charities (in our area) offer this service for a small fee. There might be other services. Even if you could find a very trustworthy person (whom you know & have vetted) might want some extra money. They could do it for less, which would certainly help you out.

    Let us know what you decide to do. I applaud that your putting your sister first.

    eagle

  • Marp
    Marp Member Posts: 170
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    Thank you, Eagle.

    I don't always feel like I'm putting my sister first. If I were, I'd probably quit my job and stay home. At the very least, I'd try to adjust my work schedule so I can drive her to the new center (about double the commute time as the old center).

    Yes, and she LOVES this day care. They are so awesome there.

    One of the other participants has latched onto my sister; her granddaughter told me that my sister is one of her grandma's friends. Her grandma doesn't like people much so the family transports her and they plan to continue doing so at the new center. I don't know where they live, but, if I can find out, we may be able to arrange something where we carpool some of the time to save both families some time and money. It would all be dependent on whether or not grandma would get in the car with me.

  • harshedbuzz
    harshedbuzz Member Posts: 4,348
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    Marp--

    Are there other families who will be making the switch from your general area? I wonder if you'd be open to arranging a carpool or paying them to transport (maybe gas money and a little extra).

    My son attended a school that was too far for the district to provide transportation-- about a 45 minute drive each way. During the regular school year, 3 of us shared driving so the most I ever did was one ride a day During summer session we lost one rider, but often picked up one or 2 more kids. I would never have survived without help. I would also ask about whether this commute qualifies as "transportation to a medical facility". My son's school was for dyslexia and did, so we were able to deduct it at tax time. Ask your tax preparer.

    HB

  • jfkoc
    jfkoc Member Posts: 3,749
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    Money well spent.

  • mommyandme (m&m)
    mommyandme (m&m) Member Posts: 1,468
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    We have a volunteer transport company for the elderly here called “Saint”. Could something like that be an option sometimes?

  • Marp
    Marp Member Posts: 170
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    Thank you.

    I've been looking into some of those. Even if they only help once or twice a month, it would be great.

    I would have to check with the day care to see what their requirements are when I have someone other than me or the other ride service drop her off and pick her up. I might be able to have a different service drop her off with no problem. The day care might just be concerned about releasing her at the end of the day to just anybody.

  • Marp
    Marp Member Posts: 170
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    That's on my list of things to try. One of my former coworkers said that the solution we put together now doesn't have to be the forever solution. As things involve & we learn more, we may find other solutions that work better.

  • Scared Chipmunk
    Scared Chipmunk Member Posts: 1
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    I am a caregiver for LO, they do not like having people coming in and out of the house, it was an act of congress getting them to agree to Palliative care coming in to check on them. My question is. I lost my life savings caring for them. We do not qualify for Medicaid as they will take the estate after the person passes away and that will leave me on the street with no home {we live in a 55+ and I am two year shy of 55 so I cannot put house in my name fully} are there grants that can help me get a safer vehicle and put toward groceries that I do not have to pay back?
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Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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