Dumbest or most inappropriate thing someone has said to you or your LOWD
Okay, let's find a way to get a chuckle out of the inappropriate and ridiculous comments people make to either us about our LO, or directly to our LO.
Here's a couple from my list
- Well they don't just tell you he has FTD and send you home, there's something they can do for it
- You should probably hurry and get a divorce so you can get some money out of this
Comments
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Are you sure about this? He looks fine to me.🥴
5 -
My Grandmother had Alzheimer's, I know what you're going through.
9 -
Hi do you know who I am?
3 -
He's 92 years old. What do you expect? (said by his cardiologist!)
2 -
I can't count how times I heard this or something similar in my caregiving years. It sent me through the roof every time. It was all I could do to keep my mouth shut from making a snide reply like how many pairs of disposable underwear have you changed today.
4 -
Oh, and another good one I just heard this past weekend, "You remember my son, you taught him, and I know you'd remember him because he was naughty"! DH doesn't even know he was a teacher much less remember her specific naughty child!
2 -
"He looks good to me."
"He seems to be doing well."
4 -
Oh! DH sleeps in the the other room why? Yeah! so I can get some sleep to do what I have to do every day( I say to myself), no clue some people will never get it best to just keep things simple and talk to friends and family that do get it. Thank God they are there the people you need, and the nice people here to bounce things around --you all get it for sure and THANKS.
4 -
Well at least you still have your husband! Really?
3 -
First visit to my husband‘s new neurologist, he walked in and introduced himself. Then he looked directly at my husband and asked, “Well, how are you doing with your memory problems. Are they getting worse?” Poor husband looks at me and says, “Do I have memory problems?” Grr!!
7 -
"Hope you're doing well!"
How could I possibly be well? I provided 24/7 care of a full grown man with the mind of a child with no help from anyone. But thanks...
This was said by DH's sister, who lives near, but has never offered any help and hasn't seen her brother in years.
9 -
There’s medication for that, you know!
2 -
DH in wheelchair, can't communicate, incontinent and needs help with all his ADLs. Brother looked at him and said "He seems very spry". Almost bit my tongue in half.
4 -
So far, I think you have won the prize for the worst comment made. I am not sure what I would have done in that situation - maybe scream or walk out. I am upset just reading such an insensitive comment. I am so sorry.
3 -
You need to worry less. Don’t sweat the small stuff.
2 -
- They have medication for that now he will be fine
- it’s sad how it takes their memories but they body is still healthy
3 -
I’mMaggieMay—“You need to worry less. Don’t sweat the small stuff.”
There Is no “small stuff” is there? Everything lost is huge because your LO is slipping away from you!
4 -
WOW!
1 -
I would have said, just a second, I need to google the definition of spry!
1 -
As I read all of these comments and go through this terrible journey, I have come to realize that until we walk in someone else's shoes we will never fully appreciate their experiences, pain, suffering and joy. It has taught me to be so much more empathic to others who have various plights. I hope I NEVER lose that perspective.
Perhaps this is the small gift we are given through our pain.
11 -
I still don't know what to say to another person with dementia. You would think I'm an expert at this but only when it comes to my DW. I could relate to the full time caregiver, that we have in common.
0 -
So is this one of his bad days? Said by dh’s brother who hasn’t seen him in over 4 years! Dh is now in a wheelchair, can’t speak, (except to say okay)doubt incontenint, and doesn’t understand what others are saying to him! Brother was trying to tell dh about a car and because dh had no idea, brother decided dh was having a “bad day “!
4 -
I expressed sympathy to a friend whose husband had died. She said to me, "In many ways, I think your situation is worse." I felt like giving her a kiss.
11 -
What's the good thing about alzheimers? Every day you get to meet new people.
1 -
Made me laugh.
My husband has always hated leftovers. I do all the cooking and could only make enough for two or the extra food would go to waste. It was a lot of work planning and cooking so many different meals. Now I can cook a big pot of soup or stew and serve it for every lunch and dinner for several days. Every meal is new to him. In his head I no longer serve leftovers. I look took for the positive where I can find it.
8 -
FIL to MILwAD when she would comment incorrectly on something: "now, C, you know that's not right." (Ummm... who has the brain problem?) And she would either roll her eyes at him and make a disgusted harumph or throw her water bottle at him.
0 -
My father had MCI, which remained stable. He was 92 at the time and I brought him to his cardiologist appointment. The cardiologist was in his 60’s. He asked my father, “tell me how you’ve been doing”. My father responded, “I’ve been doing very well”. Which was the complete truth, my father was in fact doing very well. The cardiologist responded, “yeah and someday you’re gonna drop”.
0 -
Can't you just leave her alone and go swim for an hour?
Ummm, no.
0 -
”It’s really not any harder than caring for a toddler as a single parent.”
2 -
"Really? But he's so young!"
1
Commonly Used Abbreviations
DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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