Scared and unsure

take it slow you’ve come to right place , I guess my advice would be to see a Nurologist then go from there. It could be meds he’s on

Welcome to the forum, both of you—you have come to a good place for advice and support. If you look to the right under Quick Links and Groups, there is one for new members that has a lot of good information collected in one place. Many recommend reading The 36 Hour Day, too—a good general book about caring for someone with dementia.

If the diagnosis is confirmed, early action on legal and financial affairs is always recommended. Get durable powers of attorney for heatlhcare and finances in place.

If you read a lot of threads here, you will learn a lot and feel less alone. There are a lot of wise and experienced people here ready to help. It's a heartbreaking disease.

It can be so scary and overwhelming in the beginning and honestly through the whole journey. Just take it one step at a time and try not to ruin today worrying about tomorrow. Some day ,you’ll look back on this time now and realize these were the good ole days so love, laugh and make all the amazing special memories you can. This platform and all the information you’ll study to learn about the disease will help you navigate your path even though each path is different. I’ve struggled through each step along the way but I’m still stepping. My husband is stage 6a and I’m in the process of moving him into a memory care center but we’ve had many good years since he was first diagnosed.

He may have dementia but that doesn't mean you won't have some of the most emotionally intimate moments you've ever had. Take everything one day at a time, accept who he is at that moment and realize this disease is not who he is. Get all of your documents, finances in order, POAs, wills, etc as you will be the main decision maker in the household from now on. It's tough but it's only tough today, tomorrow will hold enough trouble of it's own so try not to think too far ahead as far as careviving goes but please think ahead on how this will affect you, your finances, etc. Once that is in place you can breathe a bit easier.

There as so many wonderful comments here from our new friends and confidantes that understand exactly what we’re going through. I also worry too much about what may or may not happen, so as others have said, take it one step at a time, focus on today, while getting affairs in order. Once I had that done, I felt some relief and was better able to handle the day to day.

The special moments can still happen even in mid-stage 7. When I am leaving, I always kiss DH on the forehead and tell him I love him always and forever. In a rare moment of lucidity recently, he kissed me on the cheek and clearly said, "I love you." I will treasure that forever.

You have come to a good place for support and advice. This wonderful community has gotten me through unbearable anxiety and overwhelming grief. We are here for you.

Sending you hugs. You are not alone. This disease robs both the patient and the caregiver. Get counseling - we all need someone to talk to and perhaps ask your PCP for an antidepressant. I would suspect that most of us are on some sort of meds for this disease. Take care and keep venting and asking for advice as these folks are the best. I have learned so much from them.

”New Caregiver Help” is the group you’re looking for, I think.

Staval, you should write down all of your concerns and give them to the pcp ahead of time. Be specific and be detailed. I was in private practice for a long time. If someone came in to me worried about their memory, they were usually okay—being aware of it and not trying to minimize it usually meant there wasn't underlying dementia and we would look for other issues like stress, sleep disturbances, excess alcohol consumption. But when the family complained and let me know ahead of time: those folks I knew were really in trouble. So you're doing two things: you're letting the doc know the real reason for the visit, and you avoid having to discuss painful and potentially embarrassing details in front of your DH. Discussions like this inevitably make the affected person defensive, and most will try to minimize their symptoms. A good practitioner will be aware of these issues and will know how to put the person at ease.

Almost certainly what will happen is that the doc will do a "mini mental status exam" (MMSE) which includes about ten questions—things like orientation to time and place, obvious concrete facts (who is the president), repeating and remembering three words both immediately and after three minutes, subtracting serial sevens, following instructions (take a piece of paper, fold it in half, place it on the table); interpreting a common phrase (like a penny saved is a penny earned) and drawing a clock face set to a certain time. Then they will order blood work to rule out some treatable conditions (thyroid levels, vitamin B12) and refer him to a neurologist. They may or may not order brain imaging, and they may order the new promising blood test for Alzheimer's—Ptau217—though this is not routinely covered by insurance at this point. they may also order some genetic screening—specifically APOe4—-because this affects not only risk but ability to tolerate some of the newer IV medications like Leqembi. If the pcp doesn't do that blood work, the neurologist almost certainly will.

So you likely won't come away with an immediate answer. Some folks are fine with being seen by a neurologist; others balk and refuse to go back. Depends on the underlying personality. Some PCP's are comfortable starting medications like Aricept or Namenda—though they are of questionable help and have a lot of side effects—and some are not. Whether he is a candidate for the newer IV medications (and whether it's worth it both in terms of cost and difficulty) is a discussion to have with the neurologist.

Now is a more hopeful time than ever. New medicines have been approved, and early diagnosis is the time to intervene. Definitely book a neurologist (it can take some time to get in, it seems). Look into clinical trials in your area. There are experimental medicines with lots of promise. We got my DW (early onset, too) into a Janssen Pharmaceuticals clinical trial and it really does seem to be slowing progression. Stay strong!

Please read all you can about the diagnosis process so that you can be certain nothing treatable was over looked.