Early stage, waiting for the other shoe to drop

Maru · August 4

DH was recently diagnosed with ES Alz. Looking back, there were definite signs 5-6 years ago. A few weeks ago, he totally missed the toilet in the middle of the night, twice. Since then, nothing. Lots of good advice from this group on that.

Most of the time, he seems perfectly normal, except for his choice of word substitution. Some words that are slipped in casually are , well, bizarre, but he does it as if they were the right words…no hestiation like he looking for a word. I doubt that anyone else even catches it. Obviously, he doesn't. Just before diagnosis, he was talking about our great grandchildren and called them nephews and nieces. Last week, he said something to our son about "his grandmother" meaning me, his mother. He is beginning to have difficulty in carrying out multi -step actions, like giving the dishes a good rinse/wipe before putting them in the dishwasher.

Sometimes, I feel like I am the one who is sick…like this is me imagining all this and I beat myself up for not remembering he has Alz. and that he cannot help himself out of this disease and all the behaviour changes. In the meantime, i've got all the things that I need for bathroom clean-up and I wear slippers into the bathroom at night and turn on the light to make sure I'm not stepping in pee. To prevent him from opening the front door to strangers, i've ordered a lockable storm door for the front door and praying that he will not wander off. Are there other proactive things I can do?

Apologies for being so wordy.

M1 · August 4

make sure you have your legal and financial ducks in a row (meaning powers of attorney, wills, planning for Medicaid if necessary and remember you need to name backups and someone besides him for yourself). It’s also never too early to investigate memory care and geriatric psychiatry options in your area, the need can arise in a heartbeat. Having a backup plan should something happen to you is great peace of mind

clarinetist · August 4

Welcome Maru. When my husband had difficulty finding the toilet at night I got motion-sensitive night lights that you could stick anywhere. One went on as soon as hHe got out of bed and another one guided him to the bathroom. I also got door alarms that I stuck up high on all the exit doors in our condo. Both of these items are cheap.

Maru · August 4

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/218016#Comment_218016

We had just done our Trust prior to dx. Alz. When he gave our bank pin number to a scammer a few months ago, I took charge of the $$ and we have all the powers of att., ect. done. Good idea on the memory care, etc; I thought it way too early for that. I'm just praying, literally, that I God will keep my health problems at bay long enough to see him through home care as long as possible.

Maru · August 4

We have a night light on in bathroom, thinking I need something that he won't switch off…motion detection light? I will look for one. Good idea on the door alarms. Thanks

PS67 · August 4

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/70145/early-stage-waiting-for-the-other-shoe-to-drop

Hi Maru, I don’t think your sharing was at all wordy….more later….loosing privacy.

sandwichone123 · August 4

I haven't seen this from anyone else, but I got a safe to put valuable papers in, and also my jewelry so he couldn't "take care of" those things for me. If anyone in the household is on narcotic pain medications, those should always be locked up.

WIGO23 · August 5

I found a clock with the month, day, year, time as well as morning afternoon evening designations. It helps my DH stay oriented.

SDianeL · August 5

I put a night light in the bedroom, hallway and an LED light on top of the toilet tank. I put toilet bowl cleaner that turned the water blue so he could see it better. They make disposable mats for around the toilet. Also a toilet seat that has a deflector in front so he can sit to pee. Later I had to put furniture in the hallway to prevent him from going into the living room and trying to go outside. You should get locks for outside doors. They make plastic ones. I never installed them because I had to place my husband in memory care due to my cancer diagnosis last December.

Early stage, waiting for the other shoe to drop

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