Have any questions about how to use the community? Check out the Help Discussion.

The End is Near

CStrope
CStrope Member Posts: 487
100 Care Reactions Third Anniversary 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
Member
in Caring For a Spouse or Partner

Last Wednesday hospice called and said that the CNA felt there were major changes in DHs breathing. I quickly went to the facility and was surprised to see his breathing pattern. I believe they call it cheynes stokes. Several big breaths, then nothing for as long as 65 seconds. It was alarming to watch. By friday his muscles were rigid and contracting, and he would cry out when moved even the slightest bit. He was put on morphine friday evening, and the watching for the end of this journey began. It could be a few hours, or several days……I'm okay with him going, I want him at peace, I am not okay with watching this slow process. Our society needs to reassess how we look at supporting our loved ones as they transition during this stage.

«13

Comments

  • M1
    M1 Member Posts: 6,788
    1,500 Care Reactions 1,500 Likes 5000 Comments 1,000 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    will be thinking of you. Let us know. I hope it is peaceful for both of you.

  • harshedbuzz
    harshedbuzz Member Posts: 4,479
    Seventh Anniversary 1,000 Likes 2500 Comments 500 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    @CStrope wishing you a strength and a peaceful passage.
    HB

  • ImMaggieMae
    ImMaggieMae Member Posts: 1,031
    250 Likes 500 Comments 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Care Reactions
    Member

    wishing you strength and peace.

  • CampCarol
    CampCarol Member Posts: 82
    25 Care Reactions 25 Likes 10 Comments 5 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    I'm so sorry you're going through this. Sending hugs, thoughts and prayers your way!

  • midge333
    midge333 Member Posts: 320
    100 Likes 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions 25 Care Reactions
    Member

    I am sorry. I hope that he has a quick and painless death.

  • Karen711
    Karen711 Member Posts: 80
    25 Likes 25 Care Reactions 10 Comments First Anniversary
    Member

    …hoping for his peaceful passage and strength and love for you. I agree with the message from Nowhere. 💕

  • fmb
    fmb Member Posts: 403
    250 Care Reactions 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Likes 100 Comments
    Member

    Praying for a peaceful passing for your DH and strength and peace for you during your vigil and beyond.

  • White Crane
    White Crane Member Posts: 883
    Seventh Anniversary 250 Care Reactions 500 Comments 100 Likes
    Member

    praying for you and for a peaceful passing for him.

  • PlentyQuiet
    PlentyQuiet Member Posts: 92
    25 Care Reactions 25 Likes Second Anniversary 10 Comments
    Member

    @CStrope , I know how much of a long and difficult journey this has been for you. I'm glad his suffering is almost over. I hope you can find peace as well

  • Denise1847
    Denise1847 Member Posts: 852
    500 Likes 250 Care Reactions 500 Comments 100 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    I am so sorry. I pray that the staff can keep him comfortable (they can give him meds that will keep him comfortable) and that he passes quickly.

  • SDianeL
    SDianeL Member Posts: 975
    500 Care Reactions 250 Likes 500 Comments 100 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    so sorry. Prayers for your strength and his peaceful passing. Hugs.

  • CindyBum
    CindyBum Member Posts: 271
    250 Care Reactions 100 Likes 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    Thinking of you.

    xoxo

  • Jgirl57
    Jgirl57 Member Posts: 487
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Likes 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    you are in my heart as you go through this. (((HUGS)))

  • Joe C.
    Joe C. Member Posts: 964
    Fifth Anniversary 500 Comments 100 Care Reactions 100 Likes
    Member

    CStrope, My thoughts and prayers are with you both at this difficult time.

  • jrman
    jrman Member Posts: 5
    5 Care Reactions First Comment
    Member

    May he pass in peace and bless you for your journey as his caregiver.

  • mrahope
    mrahope Member Posts: 536
    500 Comments Fourth Anniversary 250 Care Reactions 100 Likes
    Member

    So, so sorry that you are going through this. I hope the end of your LO's journey will be peaceful and that you will have the strength you need.

  • ThisLife
    ThisLife Member Posts: 261
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Care Reactions 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    I send wishes for DH's peaceful passage and strength for you in these last days. As Nowhere said hospice provided the drugs needed for DHs peaceful, comfortable passage.

  • Russinator
    Russinator Member Posts: 9
    First Comment First Anniversary
    Member

    We are wishing you strength and peace.

  • jfkoc
    jfkoc Member Posts: 3,880
    Legacy Membership 2500 Comments 500 Likes 100 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    …thinking of you…

  • Jo C.
    Jo C. Member Posts: 2,940
    Legacy Membership 2500 Comments 250 Likes 100 Care Reactions
    Member

    Sending warmest of thoughts your way . . .

    J.

  • Joydean
    Joydean Member Posts: 1,500
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary 100 Care Reactions 100 Likes
    Member

    my thoughts and prayers are with you both. It’s been a long and rough journey for you both.

  • housefinch
    housefinch Member Posts: 399
    100 Care Reactions 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Likes 100 Comments
    Member

    Sending you strength and comfort.

  • GothicGremlin
    GothicGremlin Member Posts: 857
    Fifth Anniversary 250 Care Reactions 500 Comments 100 Likes
    Member

    @CStrope Your DH and my sister were on similar journeys and I hope his passing is as peaceful as my sister's was. And I'm with @Vitruvius - a long stretch of stage 7 is really rough, so if your DH avoids it ….

    Thinking of you …

  • ghphotog
    ghphotog Member Posts: 674
    500 Care Reactions 500 Comments 100 Likes Second Anniversary
    Member

    I' sorry for you loss. Hoping he stays comfortable and the passing is peaceful. That's the best we can hope for.

  • Jo C.
    Jo C. Member Posts: 2,940
    Legacy Membership 2500 Comments 250 Likes 100 Care Reactions
    Member

    Thinking of you . . .

    J.

  • M1
    M1 Member Posts: 6,788
    1,500 Care Reactions 1,500 Likes 5000 Comments 1,000 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    Ditto. Update us when you can. Cheyne Stokes is alarming if you've never seen it before.

  • CStrope
    CStrope Member Posts: 487
    100 Care Reactions Third Anniversary 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member
    https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/220652#Comment_220652

    thank you so much, yes we both have been going through this journey together

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more

Community Guidelines


Click here to review the ALZConnected Community Guidelines

Categories