Total incontinence would be a blessing

Hi 2 Young,

My DH is stage 6, can do practically nothing by himself, or for himself.  For the past several years, I have had to monitor him 24/7/365 to avoid just the type of accidents you describe.  He knows, for now, that he has to “go”,  just not where to go, or what to do once there.  I take him to the toilet (not really on a timed schedule, I can kind of tell he has to go), and totally, physically assist him through the entire process.  He sits to use the toilet, and only has to go 3-4 times in a 24 hour period, which is incredibly helpful. He typically sleeps all night without the need to go, another blessing, but I hear him if he gets up and I can intervene.  The constant vigilance and total assistance is tiring and annoying, but it beats the alternative.  He is definitely not ready for Depends; they wouldn’t serve a purpose.  I hope you can arrive at a solution.   Mine is a 24 hour eagle eye watch; it won’t work for everyone,  but for me, for now, it’s fine.  Good luck.  

My DH urinated into the heat vent today. On previous days and nights he has gone in the washing machine, the dryer, off the porches, into front yard bushes, in garbage bins, and in corners of a carpeted room. I feel like I monitor him every second, but still it happens. Now he has started arguing with me (with word salad and facial expressions) about using the toilet, even when he has just indicated he needs to use it and we are standing right in front of it, he will not use it. I follow him around until he grabs his crotch again, and I point him to the bathroom. Tonight, midnight, he got up to go. Then he sat in my bedroom fiddling with some laundry, asking me who I am, and refusing to go back to his bed. Finally I took the laundry and tossed it onto his bed. He followed me but took a couple swings at me, stopping just short of hitting me with his fist. He's never done that before. I told him I love him. Then he went back to bed and fell aleep. Now, an hour later, I can't sleep. He just got up again to urinate again, and went right back to bed, smiling at me on the way. Maybe I have dementia and not him. Maybe my real husband has a doppleganger who is testing my sense of humor. Maybe sleep is an unnecessary luxury.

Gosh my turn to join this club. I was just talking to DH and asking him why there were multiple red solo cups in the basement bathroom. Turns out that instead of coming upstairs to use the toilet he is peeing in solo cups and pouring the urine down the sink. We need to get a plumber in to fix two toilets, he is arguing with me and saying he will fix them (he can't) but I've let the repairs slide as we have multiple bathrooms that still function just fine and he follows around contractors that come into the house so everything takes longer and costs more. And, yes, he is peeing in cups in the other bathroom too.