Home health care

respite care is important for you to recharge. Even a few hours per week helps. The VA provided respite help for my DH. She came once a week for 4 hours. Some agencies have a minimum number of hours. She was a CNA and couldn’t give him his meds. She mainly sat and listened to him and made sure he was safe. I ran errands, went to doctors appts, went to a book store or library, etc. She would have done light housekeeping, help with bathing and fix light lunch but we didn’t need that. The agency will provide a list of what they do and decide what level of care you need. Having help would benefit you and your daughter. I highly recommend it if you can afford it and if your DW will accept it. I got my husband to accept it by telling him it was for me. I needed the help.

If you can handle the expense or the resource is available for any amount of hours, take advantage. You say that you are a little tired. It won't get better. In short order you will be a LOT tired and may find it hard to ever recover from that. The time another caregiver can take with your loved one to allow you to recharge, see the bright sunshine outside in peace, eat a quiet meal, take it and use it for your self. In regards to what do you ask of the caregiver, I struggled with what instructions to provide our caregivers also. Many home health care services promote the household chores with which they can help, laundry, meal prep, etc. I decided my instruction would be simple, make every minute you spend with my dear wife the best minute possible for her right now. Her days were miserable, her life a shambles, use the time to do whatever is appropriate to give her the best time you can in whatever way that is. There are the obvious tasks for caring for her, e.g. meals, safety, hygiene, etc. I was clear that I did not have them in our home to do those routine household tasks. They were there solely to provide what was needed to make the time with my wife the best is can be for that moment. It was critical that I find caregivers who could work in our world of constant change, adaptation, flexibility and the highs and lows. Some had to be let go, great people and caregivers for the physically impaired but not for this nightmare. I finally found caregivers who were superheroes and added safety, care, loving and enjoyment to my wife's otherwise miserable existence. Make every minute you are here the very best minute in my wife's day! When I would stay out of sight and listen and hear laughter, my wife engaging to whatever extent she could, smiling, even dancing, I knew I had given the correct direction to the caregiver.