Where do I start?

Welcome. Sorry you need to be here. There is so much to do in the beginning. One of the most important things is to see a lawyer. She should appoint a durable power of attorney, a medical poa, a living will is a good idea, a will and it might be good to ask about Medicaid planning if there is any chance that might become necessary. If a patient portal with her doctor is an option, I would set one up. Driving and living alone are two touchy topics ( when are these things no longer safe). It might be a good idea to bring these up with the neurologist. Then you have a professional’s opinion. If the neurologist says no driving or living alone it also makes them the bad guy rather than you. You will need to take over finances soon if you haven’t already. It’s probably a good idea to start thinking about her care as things progress. Will you get 24/7 in home aides ( very expensive), move her in with a family member, or assisted living ( there can be a waiting list and this is expensive also). Another important thing to do is just learn all you can about dementia. I have attended some resources.

welcome to the place for info and support. We understand how you feel. It’s overwhelming. You’re not lost or alone. We know what you’re going through. I’m not familiar with senior services. Is it the Agency on Aging or from her doctor? They usually ask questions about their ability to do ADLs. Like bathe, dress herself, prep meals. She could do those things and still not be able to live alone. It’s more than ADLs. My husband was being evaluated by the VA and the nurse asked him what would he do if a fire broke out. He thought a long time and then said he would try to put out the fire. She asked later was there anything else and he said no. My heart sank. He wouldn’t know to call 911 or get out of the house. She told me later that he should no longer be left alone for any length of time. It wasn’t safe. Ditto what H1235 posted above.