What is happening?

annie51 · May 7

This is just an observation and a feeling, but since my DH passed 4 months ago, I have heard from at least five people, all women, some of whom I know quite well, telling me their husbands are having cognitive issues or have dementia. It’s very unnerving and seems like it’s becoming all too common. What is going on? It’s scary to think of the numbers, then multiply that by the number of caregivers it affects. And what of me or others in my situation, now a widow with no children. How do we plan for a possible dementia diagnosis in the future?
This is just a vent…I was on the phone last night with a very good friend who was the latest one to tell me her husband is showing signs of dementia. Thanks for listening.

Goodlife2025 · May 7

I notice it too in the number of early onset cases coming forward.

Sunfish47 · May 7

We (my daughters and I) didn’t notice any cognitive decline in DH til he was 78-79 yrs old. So age appears to be a factor in some cases.
I don’t know what explains early onset, which is the cruelest form of this disease.

annie51 · May 7

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/271889#Comment_271889

I agree. Early onset is extra cruel. My DH was in his 70’s when it started.

dayn2nite2 · May 7

I still can be in public (like a store or a park) and quite obviously see the signs of dementia on someone's face - and know they and their family aren't even aware yet. It's a particular kind of blankness, one I now can see in photos of my mother about 10 years prior to her diagnosis.

Goodlife2025 · May 7

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/271895#Comment_271895

So interesting I find myself seeing it in others as well. Can't be sure but the thought has occurred to me.

Quilting brings calm · May 7

Scientists have been telling us for sometime that the number of people with dementia would greatly increase. Basically it’s due to the baby boomer generation having reached the age when it becomes apparent. You have to remember that we were the largest generation because WWII kept the birth numbers down.
Now add to that the fact that better medical care has allowed us to live longer- so that we live long enough for dementia to become apparent.

Emily 123 · May 7

Yes-I remember when my mom had reached 85 and we all thought she was free and clear of anything other than old age catching up with her.

Diagnosed at 90.

I can definitely see that 'vagueness' out in public & think ''Uh-oh, dementia''.

CindyBum · May 8

One of my best friend's husband is now in early stages. She and I both have spouses diagnosed with early onset. Two of my best friend's mothers have just been diagnosed. It's been a little overwhelming to see it all around my friend group. I do think we've hit the age where these things are happening with our parents, if they're still with us.

I have no idea how I'll deal with my own aging. I don't have children and have a very small family (just 4 of use total). I can't even imagine that now, just 3 months from my DW passing.

harshedbuzz · May 8

@annie51

I'm sorry your social circle is dealing with this.

I think the increase you're seeing is multifactorial. Partly it's the combination of longer lifespans and the increased risk of dementia with age. At 85+ over a third of individuals have clinical Alzheimer's which doesn't include other forms of dementia. At this point in time, the sheer size of the generations likely to be impacted by the diagnosis is much bigger than previous age cohorts.

I think another piece is that in generations past, the symptoms of dementia were written off by families as normal aging. I recall my DH claiming there was no dementia in his family and then describing his maternal grandfather's mood changes, erratic behavior and need for my MIL to obtain guardianship after some disastrous decisions. But, yeah, no dementia there.

I think the stigma is less than it was. People, in general, are more open and pragmatic about all manner of conditions— cancer, mental illness, developmental differences and dementia— than in previous generations. It could be the people who shared with you only did so because they know you get it.

Some papers I've seen have been hopeful around future outcomes. Specifically, better preventative medical care around things like BP and the protection more education seems to provide may reduce rates in time.

https://www.alz.org/getmedia/ef8f48f9-ad36-48ea-87f9-b74034635c1e/alzheimers-facts-and-figures.pdf

HB

beachwalker5 · May 8

In past generations, people died of heart disease and cancer in their 40's - 60's. Advancements in medicine have extended lifespans so that maybe the brain is now the most vulnerable organ with respect to longevity? I also have noticed that besides my DW with dementia symptoms, we both have multiple senior friends who are also currently dealing with various levels of memory/ cognitive impairment. Yet another indicator that "we are living in interesting times"….I miss the good old boring normal times…..

beachwalker5 · May 8

PS: I think there is still a HUGE stigma attached to dementia/ AD. I sometimes wonder if if that plays some subconscious role in my DW's anosognosia? When I've made the mistake of lovingly confronting her about my concerns about her memory loss and changes in her behavior, she accuses me of calling her "crazy"/ "mentally ill" and takes it as criticism/ judgement even when I tell her it is not her choice or fault. If I had her symptoms and was aware of them (no anosognosia), it would be absolutely devastating/ frightening to my self esteem and sense of security/ control/ well being. Could anosognosia = a survival self-defense coping mechanism by the brain????

Timmyd · May 9

The statistic I have run across multiple times is that 1 in 10 people over 65 have some form of dementia. It is a very common condition. Hopefully we all get a lot better being comfortable around it and treating those affected with patience and compassion.

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