Scammers
Hello, anyone had issues with their DH being vulnerable to scammers? I have had to change the cell number, delete What’s App and FB messenger. In addition, limited the debit card to certain amount of ATM transactions and point of sales. I have also taken away credit cards. It’s been a terrible weekend getting scammed for over a $1000.
Comments
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Oh yes! Even the best of us have fallen victim to these unscrupulous criminals, let alone someone with cognitive deficits. Whenever the phone rang, DH would run to answer, and I'd hear him answer "yes." This horrified me because the other side could be recording his "yes" and apply it to agreeing to whatever it was they were "selling." So all internet access, financial access, phone access, etc. have been taken away. It's the only way I know how to protect us from evil doers while we navigate this horrible disease.
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My DH is long past being able to do us any financial harm. He doesn’t any longer know how to log on and access the internet or use his cell phone (I put TikTok on his phone so he can still, with help, watch the videos).
But there was a difficult time a few years back in 2021 that he was answering every scam phone call and making “friends” on Facebook. Total damage: about $300 on gift cards sent to strangers “in need” and two new iPhones sent to an “admirer” in California (but who was really it turns out a scammer in Ghana). He was being reeled in on an expensive investment when I found out what was happening and alerted the bank and the brokerage holding his retirement accounts, and put a lock on his accounts. I also called to his credit card companies to report fraud which caused the accounts to be cancelled. And I made sure he “lost” his debit card.
This is a difficult phase to go thru. I hope it passes quickly for you.2 -
I have mentioned this before but for your info… My DH responded to a scam on FB. He called the accompanying phone number and they wanted him to do such and such. Luckily, I caught it in time, but this was scam number two for him. My DH has a VOIP …OOMA. With their system I was able to limit all incoming and outgoing calls to just those numbers that I entered into his contact list. I have been told that you can also do this on IPhone. It is also my understanding that the ALZ society shop has such a phon
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I have had that problem with texts and phone calls. He gets texts such as ones saying he owes money for a toll not paid. I caught him once about to put in a credit card number. Luckily he didn’t and hasn’t done any of that since, but I keep a close watch on him.
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This was years ago, but my MIL was scammed by people who went door to door posing as a Veteran's organization. She would write them a $35 check monthly. It took us a while for us to catch this scam - at the point in her decline that I took over her banking, I noticed that the organization that cancelled the check was NOT a Veterans organization - it was scammers know to the State of California. So beware of door to door scammers, and maybe remove access to the checkbook too. Also, my DH currently has a GrandPad - a device sold by Consumer Cellular that is a stripped down tablet / phone made simple for seniors to use. At this point he's not really competent to make or receive calls, but he likes to play the games on it. The GrandPad is programmed to only receive calls from family and friends.
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Sadly, it’s very common. Take away the phone and all internet capability. Monitor the mail. Answer the door yourself.
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I locked everything down after my DH tried to pay for someone to go into his computer and fix it. I took his debit card. He never realized it was gone which kind of proved my point that he could no longer manage it. I always made sure there was at least $20 in his wallet but no more than $40 so that he always has money.
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Question… do those door signs work? (The ones that say, "No solicitors") I know it doesn't cover all the scammers, but we have so many people coming to our door these days.
I haven't tried one of those signs yet, but I can be pretty rude to people who come to my door trying to sell me something (or to tell me who I should vote for, etc). Unfortunately, my DH will talk to them.
Today, I had just stepped out of the shower when the doorbell rang, so DH answered it. The salesperson asked if he could come back, when he could talk to both of us about a security system he was selling. DH told him we wouldn't be here because we are meeting people for dinner. 🤐
A few months ago, DH told a salesperson where he went to college and where he grew up.
I just now put a sign on the inside of the door to remind DH to just say, "not interested" and I reminded him that it's okay to be rude. I think I need a new plan.
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We also have a lot of people knocking on our door for whatever they are pushing. I usually answer the door and tell them that we are not interested. One day I was busy doing something when the doorbell rang and my Stage 5/6 DW answered the door. In the past and even now she has always been a talker. When she answered the door I just stood out of sight and observe the conversation going on. She kept talking making absolutely no sense and the solicitor finally said thank you and walked away. I thought that maybe I should have her answer the door all the time. 🤔
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For a year my wife was taking a "brain supplement" that I felt didn't do her any good. When she ran out, she did not know how to contact them, but they called her to get her to renew it. By this time I had taken all her credit cards and the check book, so she had no financial information to give them. I would listen in and sometimes I found it hard to not laugh at how frustrated they'd get.
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Instead of a credit alert, I recommend contacting all three reporting agencies and putting a credit freeze on your accounts. This way, no one can open an account or take out a loan in your name. (You still have to protect yourself in all the other ways, but this helped reduce our potential scamming activity).
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Commonly Used Abbreviations
DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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