Looking for Some Advice

Welcome. I would suggest you make an appointment for her and tell her she is due for a check up, or the doctor called and wants to see her to check on her whatever (blood pressures, blood sugar ). You might fill the doctor in on your ruse as long as you are seeing the doctor anyway. Don’t try to convince her, it just won’t work. Many with dementia suffer from anosognosia. This is an inability to recognize their symptoms or limitations. A pcp will probably do just a very quick test. This is not going to tell you much. In fact my mom showed no problems at all. I insisted she be referred to a neurologist. After the 2 hour test with the neurologist they said she was not safe to drive and should not live alone. Don’t get your hopes up as far as treatment goes, there is really not much that can be done. Dementia is about so much more than a bad memory. I will attach a staging tool that may help. Some of the things I noticed- lack of empathy, poor judgment, short attention span, problems with priorities, confusion with tasks that should be easy, decreased logic and reasoning, personality changes, very picky about food, unsteady on her feet. Bringing her symptoms up in front of her in the doctors office will probably not go well. You might use a patient portal to give the doctor this information. Even write everything out on paper and give to the receptionist. You might talk with the doctor at your appointment about the best way to get him/her information before her appointment. You will want to make sure all legal matters are in order. You need a DPOA! If you haven’t done this yet, tell her it’s because you are both getting older. I would NOT bring up her memory issues (it will just upset her). As a general rule it’s best to just do what need to be done (even if it requires you to fib or be less than honest) without trying to convince her or get her to understand.

https://iona.org/therapeutic-fibs-ok/