Driving - any ideas on softening the blow?

Audrey22 · July 26

My husband has Alzheimers and is slowly getting worse.

3 doctors and some friends have said he shouldn't be driving.

He went for a road test but failed the eye test so couldn't do the road test then went to an optometrist who said he was Ok to drive and sent in the forms from the DMV. We haven't heard from DMV and I made one attempt to contact them. Essentially I think he shouldn't be driving either so have let matter lay.

He gets very agitated about this and I just remain silent or change the subject.

He won't accept much help as he believes there is nothing wrong with him - anosognosia.

terei · July 26

I would make sure I Got to the mail and got rid of any reply from the DMV

Dan520 · July 26

If he failed the eye test but the optometrist says he's ok, he could have posterior cortical atrophy (PCA). That's what my wife has. She can be looking right at something and not see it.

The eyes see it but have trouble sending the message to the brain. A rare form of dementia that will end up with symptoms from ALZ. Just a possibility.

mbmaz · July 26

I have a husband with early stage Alzheimer’s. He has glaucoma and retinol occlusion and receives injections in his eyeballs every six weeks or so.
he is still driving because he passes the driving test. he’s beginning to not be able to focus on two things at once for example, if he is watching something on television and really focusing and able to follow it, I can’t speak to him because he can’t hear me while he’s focusing on television
no multitasking at all. He’s only 73.
When he can’t understand questions, I ask him. He’s beginning to become more angry. He says he’s not angry at me. He’s just frustrated.
One of my concerns is, we don’t have any long-term care insurance coverage. He’s very energetic and always wanting to be doing something. Has never been one just to sit and relax or even be a couch potato. Very limited with sedentary type activities.

mbmaz · July 26

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/278339#Comment_278339

What my DH has sounds similar.
he will often not want to wear his glasses and tell me he thinks he sees something totally different than what he’s .

I don’t know if it’s his vision or his Alzheimer’s. I encourage him to put his glasses on. He’s recently had a hearing test because his neurologist if he has bad hearing to make sure it’s addressed. Being able to see properly in here properly I’m very important in this early stage of Alzheimer’s.

my DH is receiving Kisunla infusions. Actually has just received his first his first MRI is this week. i’m sorry to hear about your spouse.

CharlieS · July 26

If your LO has been officially diagnosed with Alzheimer’s or any kind of dementia he shouldn’t be driving. If he has an accident, you could lose everything. I would talk to your PCP about it. We were told by both my DH’s neurologist and his PCP, after in office cognition tests, that he should not be allowed to drive. That was almost two years ago and he hasn’t driven since.

Belle60 · July 26

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/278339#Comment_278339

Is PCA something that can occur after a diagnosis of Alzheimers? My husband is in late stage 5 and I have noticed that lately he will be looking right at something but then ask where it is.

annie51 · July 26

When my DH failed the cognition test, they said that he would need to take something called a DriveAble test which is administered by an Occupational Therapist. It evaluates things like control, judgment, reaction time, etc. This is because a person could still have perfect vision and pass a standard road test, but that’s not really the issue with someone with dementia in real world driving. When DH refused to take that test, he was reported to DMV based on the low score on his cognition test. The DMV sent a form that needed to be filled out by a doctor in order to keep his license. Naturally no doctor would do it so he had to surrender his license. He was angry at the doctors for a while but quickly got used to me doing all the driving. I was glad that I wasn’t the one who forced him to stop driving, and happy that hurdle was finished. I agree with @terei said about intercepting the DMV reply. In my opinion, the optometrist should know better than to sign the form for the DMV if he/she knew that he had a dementia diagnosis.

Maru · July 26

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/278343#Comment_278343

This is always a hard thing. No one wants to lose their independence and driving a car gives a sense of that. I saw that you were concerned about not having long term care insurance but I would be more concerned about whether your auto insurance would cover your LO if he is driving with diagnosed ALZ…and it may not.

tboard · July 26

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/76657/driving-any-ideas-on-softening-the-blow

I made constant excuses to keep my DH from driving and I hid all of the car keys. I can't think of any way to make this easier. Eventually he bought my argument that he didn't have a car anymore and when we got him one he could drive but until then I would be happy to give him rides in my car.

sandwichone123 · July 26

I think @tboard has a great idea. Lots of times with dementia it's smoother to finesse things than to tackle them head on. You can't reason with someone whose reasoner is broken. Unplugging something in the engine so it won't start, moving the vehicle to someone else's house and telling them it's in the shop, losing all the keys (I bought a safe to put stuff in so my dh couldn't lose valuable papers). My dh did us the favor of totaling his car so I didn't have to make many excuses—just went looking to buy him a new car and talked about how expensive they are these days so we couldn't get one. Over time he also got used to riding with me.

Audrey22 · July 26

Thank you all for your replies - I am already following some of the paths you suggest and just fudging along basically.

I have POA and have taken the battery out of his car keys to my car. His truck is a monument in the driveway - rather jauntily situated but I do nothing about that either as it is not registered (nor can be) or insured - the battery is flat and he keeps urging me to call AAA - I have not.

His eyes didn't test well at DMV because he has a neck problem and couldn't access the machine properly. That neck problem also means he cannot turn his head to see cars coming from the left or right at intersections.

There have been various "dances" with his PCP re his driving mainly due to me trying to advocate for my husband - I now realize that was not OK and firmly on the side of him not driving.

It seems its a take the anger and wait it out situation.

SDianeL · July 26

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/278354#Comment_278354

My husband was initially diagnosed with Dementia - probably vascular. 18 months later after I sent behaviors & symptoms to all his doctors, his Neurologist looked at his last CT Scan again and responded that his symptoms were "consistent with PCA - Posterior Cortical Atrophy." PCA is a type of Alzheimer's which is a type of Dementia. My husband's symptoms were that he saw a large black area on one of his eyes. His vision was fine. He also had episodes of extremely high blood pressure, sweating, nausea & dizziness. 2 trips to the ER and they found nothing that would cause it.

Driving - any ideas on softening the blow?

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