Feeling lost

tboard
tboard Member Posts: 366
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in Caring For a Spouse or Partner

My DH entered stage 8 yesterday. The last couple of weeks were rough as he was in a memory care facility. I ended up spending most of my time with him so that I could help with his care. He was fortunate to be accepted at Our Lady of Peace Hospice. We moved him in on Monday and he took his last breath early Thursday morning . He received excellent end of life care.

We were married for 46 years. The last three or four were hard on both of us. I miss him and feel grief and relief at the same time. It really was a long goodbye as I lost him a little at a time.

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  • ronda b
    ronda b Member Posts: 457
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    So sorry for your loss.

  • Scooterr
    Scooterr Member Posts: 237
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    tboard I'm so sorry for the loss of your DH. 46yrs together is a blessing, I pray you find peace on your journey of healing.

  • harshedbuzz
    harshedbuzz Member Posts: 6,995
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    I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved husband.

  • tboard
    tboard Member Posts: 366
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    https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/284292#Comment_284292

    I am sorry for your loss.

  • Chance Rider
    Chance Rider Member Posts: 401
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    edited October 16

    @tboard

    I’m so sorry for the loss of your dear husband. 💜

  • Jgirl57
    Jgirl57 Member Posts: 902
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    So very sorry. (((Hugs))) and peace to you.

  • Victoriaredux
    Victoriaredux Member Posts: 353
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    You'd think after years of warning it would be easier , whatever that word means . But it isn't . Afterwards it was surprising at the sense of void & emptiness that remains .

    Not just that your loved one has moved on but the emptiness left because the whole structure - their doctors ,heath plans, care homes, are gone now too.

    After decades of that person being always in your thoughts - are they running low on whatever , they'll like this story etc etc -they are gone.

    When one is young you hope/ plan to be a couple but no one I've heard of plans for starting over footloose after decades. Feels like being an uprooted plant.

    [Hate to say it but the financial picture can change a lot when its a single vs married tax bracket so get with your lawyer /accountant soon to take advantage of this year's last married filing status and plan your IRA withdrawals if that's on your plate. You don't want to get the accountant's slow head shake next February when they say you could have done blah blah in '26 ].

  • wose
    wose Member Posts: 448
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    I’m so so sorry for the loss of your hubby. 46 years of marriage is quite the feat and you must have so many wonderful memories. You two had such a rough going but you showed us what an amazing person you are. I wish you peace and comfort 💕💙

  • marier
    marier Member Posts: 170
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    May you find peace in the memories you made during your marriage and life with your husband over the last 46 years. This journey is bitter sweet and it is true a very long goodbye. My Dh died on 9/25/2026 and I too am walking this new path in stage 8. I am sending you hugs and prayers.

  • suvi
    suvi Member Posts: 32
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    I’m so sorry for the loss of your dh, @tboard . May he rest in peace. 🫂

  • dcare45
    dcare45 Member Posts: 258
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    I am sorry for your loss. May your Husband be at peace now and may you remember the love of 46 years. God bless you.

  • jgreen
    jgreen Member Posts: 540
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    Dear @tboard

    I too am sending condolences on your great loss. May perpetual light shine upon your DH of 46 years, and may he rest in peace.

    And may God hold you close at this time.

  • tonyac2
    tonyac2 Member Posts: 316
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    I hate this disease. It steals our loved ones while they’re still here, then death takes away their physical presence. I’m both sorry and relieved for you @tboard.

  • Maru
    Maru Member Posts: 567
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    https://alzconnected.org/discussion/77352/feeling-lost

    Sorry for your loss. May you find some comfort in the knowledge that your LO is at last at peace.

  • Goodlife2025
    Goodlife2025 Member Posts: 499
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    @tboard so sorry to learn of your recent journey into stage 8. May His Peace be with you and yours during this time. Such a terrible disease, we all understand

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more

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