What happened here today

Rescue mom

I understand that worry about her acting ni

Rescue mom

I well know that concern that they may not see how she can be, or what she can do. Hopefully, your professional background and/or contacts will bolster your case. My DH was very good at acting better with other people, the geriatric psychiatrist was the one who could really “read” him. Prayers you will be dealing with a smart helpful person. 

Everybody says take care of yourself…you have so much going on now, it must seem impossible. Just two things from a psychiatrist: PTSD is real, and it’s not just for soldiers. There is help for that. And, Alzheimer’s, or her dementia, has already claimed one life.  Don’t let it take yours, too.

Jo C.

Am thinking of you M1 and will surely be doing so tomorrow.   Hope all goes well and I am sending warm thoughts and best wishes your way once again,

J.

Buggsroo

M1,

You have to save your own life, that is really important. Your partner sadly is not herself and never will be. I do sympathize with her being a fiery redhead, I am one myself except the red has faded to auburn. That aside, you have been incredible for her and very loving and proactive. Now it is your turn, she needs to be somewhere safe where she can be cared for. 

I feel for you, yes she will miss the farm, the animals etc. However, she will forget that as well. I know that is sad, but probably true. Anyways there are probably two cats wandering around with the biggest food hangovers in Christendom. I hope things get back on track, I hope you will keep us posted. 

M1

A lot riding on tomorrow. I hope they'll admit her even if it means an all day ordeal in the ER. Best would be a direct admit from the office but I think the chances of that happening are slim. I've packed her a few things, guess I'd better pack mine also. Just in case. plans made for the animals too.

She's calm but she doesn't know me. Has told two different people this week (including one who called tonight after dinner) that I had left her and that someone else was staying with her now (couldn't name). Told me she wishes she would die. Tried to get her mind off it by walking outside at sunset, pointing out to her all the beauty she had helped create, told her how much I loved her. Had a terrible feeling of finality to it.

abc123

My heart is with you M1 and your precious partner. I am praying all will go well tomorrow for you both. You, are a warrior.

Joydean

 I hope and pray tomorrow is a better day for you and your wife. You are definitely in all our thoughts. You have helped me in so many ways, I just wish I could say something that could help you. The best I can do is pray for you both! 

abc123

M1, have you considered not giving her the am dose of seroquel ? Do you have any videos from a meltdown? I'm concerned she will sail thru the doctor visit on her best behavior and we all know what's really happening at your house. I am so sorry.

M1

Thank you both, again, I'll take all the help I can get right now. That's a good idea about the morning dose abc, makes me a little fearful to not give it but you're probably right. No videos, it was too quick and too intense. We discussed it briefly tonight in the context of my preparing her that we needed to discuss the driving issue with the doctor tomorrow. She has absolutely no memory of doing it, of course. It was upsetting to her, so I tried to change the subject pretty quickly. That's when she told me she wished she would just die.

Abc I hope your mom is resting comfortably. Joydean, your support means the world...

Quilting brings calm

I agree with abc.   Do not give her the medication in the morning. Also repeat constantly to every medical person you see- . She’s a danger to herself and to me.  Vividly describe everything she’s done that has been unsafe.  Stress that your farm is not safe for her to be at and that she is in danger there. . I worry that you will be sent home  because she’s not acting dangerously enough at the exact minute the doctor/ER sees her.  Then you will have to go through this scenario again.

I will say this- if they send you to the ER and she is not medicated, a few hours of waiting May  produce the reaction from her that you need to get her admitted.  My last ER visit with my mom was as if she was in her terrible twos. Tantrums and meltdowns. 

Let us know the update when you can.

abc123

My prayer for you this morning,

O Lord, I pray for M1who needs your comfort now, and I ask you to be her shield today, her glory and the lifter of her head. Surround her life with your comforting presence during this difficult time.

Bless and keep M1. Make your face to shine upon her and be abundantly gracious to her. Lift up your countenance upon M1 today and give her your peace. Pour forth your mercy and comfort upon M1 today Father.  Amen!

Ed1937

M1, I think abc's idea about skipping the seroquel is brilliant. If you could just get a few seconds recorded, that might make the difference. Whether or not you go that route, I pray that you will be able to get the help you both drastically need. I wish the best for you today, and I'll be thinking about you all day.

White Crane

M1, my prayers are with you today.  Praying for wisdom for the doctor and strength and peace for you.  Sending love and hugs.  Let us know how it goes.

Brenda

toolbeltexpert

M1 praying for a good outcome today

LadyTexan

I am praying for you and your loved one as well. May God give you strength and patience and comfort.

loveskitties

M1, thoughts and prayers are with you today that you and your LO get the help you both need.

Beachfan

M1, I am thinking about you and your partner this morning and praying for you both- - peace and rest for you and peace and rest for your partner.  It must be so hard for both of you.  I am leaving in a few to “visit” DH.  Isn’t it sad that he doesn’t know me from a bag of trash and that makes me happy……My heart hurts for you both; this disease is so devastating.  Stay strong.

jfkoc

thinking of you and hoping you will find the help needed and the strenght to hang in.

Lills

M1, Good luck today.  I'll be thinking of you and hoping for the win-win solution!

Jo C.

Dear M, you have been in my thoughts today; it is now afternoon your time, and I am heartily hoping that you have been able to get the necessary results for your beloved partner.  Prayer has been sent up on your behalf.

Shall be checking back at intervals. 

J.

ButterflyWings

M1- You have been in my thoughts off and on throughout the day. 

What an outpouring of prayers and well-wishes to accompany you and your LO at this stressful juncture. You are an amazing caregiver and tremendous support to our community. May you receive all the cooperation, teamwork, insight and compassion from those you are relying on in the system this week, that you consistently offer to forum-mates. We are holding you up at this time and really, really pulling for you to get exactly the people and solutions needed right now - to meet current and near-term needs for your specific situation. 

Deep breaths. You’ve got this. And we have got your back!

Ed1937

I expected to hear something by now. Hopefully that means he's been busy setting things up for both of them.

abc123

Oh Ed, I hope you are right.

M1

Just got home, admitted after a truly horrendous seven hour ER experience. And I'm no stranger to ERs. More tomorrow, I'm exhausted and so sad. Your many posts warm my heart enormously. The house feels so empty. But its so her.

Quilting brings calm

M1-  thanks for the update.  We’ve all been keeping a watchful eye for an update.  ERs with a dementia patient are a special source of frustration and exhaustion.  I hope you get the support you need and can get her in a safe place.

Joydean

M1, 

Just rest for now. Don’t lay in bed thinking about anything. Go to sleep. God is with you! We are all thinking about you. Sleep now. 

abc123

I'm thankful you are home safe.

Ed1937

M1, I hope you were able to get some sleep. Seven hours in the ER will wear you out, even if your LO does not have dementia. We'll all be watching for your next post.

Battlebuddy

So sorry M1. Had  been checking for your update. 7 hours sounds awful. Only went to the ER once with hubby and swore never again. You must be exhausted . Been praying for you and DW. I hope they can get her to a more stable place or location.

White Crane

M1, I hope you were able to sleep. I’ve been praying for you and your loved one. Seven hours in the ER is quite an ordeal for anyone. When you’re up to it, please let us know how you are doing.

Brenda