Panic with incontinence

PeachyPat

Hi this is Pat,

I care for my 87-yr old, ex who is in stage 6 dementia. My biggest concern is his panic when he feels the urge to urinate. Although he can still walk (slowly) on his own, he is so determined to get to the bathroom, that he has almost fallen a couple of times. I have a bed alert in his room so I can assist him at night but he is so determined to get his clothes off that I have a hard time getting him into his bathroom ( in his room). He doesn't comprehend that he is wearing incontinence underwear, so he always wants to touch his underpants I can handle that. Any thoughts on how I can help him accept this situation? He is already on several drugs to deal with anxiety and restlessness as well as sleep meds. Thanks

mommyandme (m&m)

I’m very sorry for what you and your ex are going through. Could a portable/bedside commode be helpful? Unfortunately or fortunately, depending on how you look at it, his brain may allow him to forget how to use the bathroom or even feel the urge to eliminate. Such a disgusting disease.

cutchelow

I feel what you are going through. I've tried "depends" diapers, urinal, bedside commode. During the day I can usually catch when he needs to go but at night it is a different story.. I sleep outside his room on a bed in the living room. I usually hear when he gets up but often it is too late. He takes off his clothes and urinates wherever. The bedroom has carpet and so it is difficult to try to clean up afterwards. I just found where he had turned over the potty chair (with urine in it). This is the most frustrating part of the caregiver job for me. I don't know what to do next. If I start sleeping in the room with him, I'll never get enough rest. I'm running on empty and I do have hospice coming to help.

M1

Hi pat. Is he on any meds for prostate issues? Not sure if they would help, but you might discuss whether a med like Flomax would help him. Just a thought