Need Ideas for duties/tasks an In-home care aid/companion can do

Somm0075

My mom and dad are finally open to having an in-home care aid come in a few times a week to help out around the house and most importantly, give my dad a rest from caregiving for my mom. Along with the normal apprehension to having a stranger come into their house, the big stressor for my dad right now is that he doesn't know what the in-home aid is going to do while they are there.

Just some context, their house is very neat and tidy, so while some light housekeeping can be done, it isn't anything that is going to be taking a ton of time. Also, they live very simple lives and don't have many hobbies/activities that they do. They used to have a horse, which took up a majority of their time, but they had to sell the horse once it became too much work to handle. My mom doesn't like to do a lot of the "typical" activities that many others do, like playing cards, knitting, games, etc. - frankly, I'm not even sure what she fills her days with these days. Any place/activity that would take place outside of the house would be one that the two of them would do together (i.e. going to grandkids' activities, local events, etc.), and things like shopping, sightseeing, etc. would not interest her. Lastly, she was never a big "conversationalist", and now the Alzheimer's has progressed to the point where she really can't keep a conversation going for very long - she can't track/remember and gets very frustrated.

Does anyone have any suggestions for activities/duties that an in-home aid could do that aren't just the "standard" ones (i.e. dressing, meals, etc.). We have all of those on the list, but I'm looking for some different and maybe even unique activities people have come up with for someone to do while at their home. It would be nice to give my dad a few ideas to start him off with until they get used to having a companion in the house and a routine established.

Thanks!

sara711

Hi. I was in the exact same situation as you back in July. My mom didn't really have hobbies and she can't do too much now, without a lot of help. I asked others the same thing trying to get ideas. All I was able to think of was just the traditional cleaning/housekeeping but then baking or meal prepping for later on in the week. Our caretaker started baking my mom's favorite muffins and cookies, while my dad gave her their chili recipe to make. This way she was still near my mom staying busy while my mom got used to her, but it also helped my dad out by not having to cook all the meals. I will say though, after a few weeks she did less housekeeping and more sitting with my mom. I was initially upset but then just went with it and she and my mom did end up connecting. So I've now saved some of my mom's favorite tv shows, familiar movies and also a playlist of babies laughing onto their tv for the caregiver to turn on and watch together with my mom. In the end, I think if you have the right caregiver it'll naturally work out over time. It's not easy (as I had a really hard time with it myself at first), but hopefully be better with time. Best of luck to you!

GemsWinner12

Sorting through and organizing photo albums, letters, and momentos. Organizing appointments . Bring out stored boxes of clothing, contents of unused closets and help your parents to decide what items would be acceptable for donation or a yard sale in the spring. If your parents are "collectors", perhaps have the helper test the waters with sorting through surplus items and earmark them for charity and/or a yard sale in the spring. As the daughter of two parents in two separate households, I would caution you to go through these items first to ensure there are no tempting items which a caregiver would help him/herself to somewhere down the line. They all start out great, but wind up feeling entitled to items, and/or will claim they were promised certain momentos. It's a line to walk with caregivers in the home regarding boundaries; please tread carefully.

terei

I had a lady come in to visit with my mom. They would go through mom’s photos + she would ask my mom to tell her about her family + life + travels. She would take my mom to lunch at least once a week(I paid for both of them of course) or to the hairdresser or appointments she had…..this would give your dad a break if he does not leave the house while she is attending to your mom. My mom loved garage sales going to thrift stores so she would take her to those also. She also made cookies with my mom + did her nails if mom wanted that.

jfkoc

Create a recipe book...scrapbook, let your father get out of the house or just take a nap

You may be surprised how much your "visitor" adds just being there to talk to.

Somm0075

I love all of these ideas! THANK YOU SO MUCH! I initially thought help with sorting through pictures would be too much or somehow "trigger" something, but it makes sense that it might be a good thing and that the good memories would be good for her to be able to talk about it!