the first steps in the journey

conniesens

Hi there,

I'm caring for my MIL and while our family is aware and in agreement about our concerns with her possible diagnosis, I'm feeling stuck with how to put in place the necessary things like POA and medical POA. Mom has started becoming aggressive and is absolutely in denial about our concerns. I don't know how to get her to agree to let us take control of the future needs shesgoing to have without a doctor diagnosis. How did y'all handle all the things a caregiver has to do for someone with this disease? Her day to day care is easy for me, but the rest feels so hard to get put in place. Any advice is appreciated.

M1

Welcome to the forum. Read about anosognosia, it’s a feature of the disease that actually keeps her from perceiving any deficits (much more than denial). Probably the best way to get her to a doctor is to tell her it’s required by Medicare or she’ll lose her insurance. Write down all of your concerns for the doctor ahead of time and in private.

a good certified elder law attorney can help you with the legal pieces (look at nelf.org) and will know how to deal with her reluctance. You can also tell her that everyone in the family is updating their papers so she should too (really not a bad idea).