My Parent Has Become Aggressive

TXTOAD

Immediate need for advice! My parent suffering from dementia has progressed to the point of needing care at a facility full time. My stepparent is doing all possible to provide my parent with the best possible care. My parent has been to three different facilities in the last six months. My parent left the first facility when my stepparent determined the care being provided was inadequate. At the second facility, my parent was being violent with other patients and caregivers and the second facility told my stepparent that my parent was no longer welcome there and sent my parent home with NO notice! My stepparent, under advice of their PCP, took my parent to All Saints hospital in Fort Worth and would not leave until they admitted my parent for testing. Turns out my parent had a bad UTI and we were told this can lead to violent and unreasonable behavior. My stepparent found a third facility to take my parent to stay. My parent has been there for less than two months and the facility seems to be building a case to kick my parent out as well, but I cannot blame them due to a report today that my parent was violent with another patient in the facility just this afternoon. So I am turning to this community for advice:

We live in NE Tarrant County. My parent has already been to Keller Oaks, Emerald Hills, and Westpark. Are there any facilities you can recommend? My stepparent says her clinicals report the bad behavior, so the stepparent is having a difficult time find a facility that will accept my parent. Also, my parent is a Medicaid patient, so this increases the challenge. Can you improve a patient's clinicals if they stop the offending behavior?

Do we need to ask the doctor to sedate my parent to decrease my parent's likelihood of more violence? How do you get a dementia patient to understand they are misbehaving when you can't reason with them and they forget what you tell them 30 seconds after you say it??

What medications would you recommend for this situation? When I see my parent, my parent behaves just fine for me, but if a staff member tries to assist my parent (for example: helping my parent sit properly in the wheelchair so my parent does not fall out), my parent becomes belligerent and agitated and extremely disrespectful (definitely not my parent's normal behavior prior to dementia). I ask my parent if they are feeling sad, angry, anxious, etc. but my parent just shrugs and says, "no, not really".

Please help - I am new to this forum and definitely new to helping my stepparent navigate this world we have been thrust into.

M1

Welcome to the forum. S/he needs to be admitted to a geriatric psychiatric ward and regulated on medication until the aggression is controlled. This can take a few weeks. Then they can be transferred to a new facility. The social workers can help find a new placement .

H1235

I’m glad you found this place. It a resource full of so much practical real information. Sounds like she definitely needs some medication to help her with the anger. The right medication can make a big difference. You used the word sedation, that seems kind of extreme to me. I think it’s possible with the correct medication for your parent to be alert and present(as they can be with dementia) and have the aggression treated. I’m shocked that after 3 different facilities this has not been brought up by the facility or her pcp. It’s also concerning that her pcp did not test for uti. A worsening of symptoms is common with a uti. If there was an improvement and now there are problems again I would wonder if she has another uti. They can be a reoccurring problem with the poor personal hygiene and incontinence that often comes with dementia. I agree with M1. Finding the correct medication can be tricky and a geriatric psychiatric ward is going to be the best place. If that can’t happen for financial reasons consider an appointment with a geriatric physician.

TXTOAD

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/211625#Comment_211625

Thank you. I was not aware that there was such a thing as a "geriatric psych ward". It sounds like this type of facility would be much better suited to help my parent. I appreciate your response.

TXTOAD

Thank you. II am glad to have found this forum and I appreciate your advice. I know I said "sedate" but I should have said "medicate". The last thing I want is for my parent to be a shell of a person! I am slowly coming to the realization that my parent will never be the same, but I have found that when I bring up good memories for my parent that they will still smile and laugh and be themselves, if only for a few moments. This is such an unfair disease. I will talk with my stepparent about getting a referral to visit a geriatric physician and possibly taking my parent to a geriatric psych ward. I appreciate your comments.