New to this

Abernier

Hello everyone. My step-mother and Mother both have Alzheimer's, early stages for Mom and getting more advanced for step-mom. Any advice on navigating this without it breaking me? I also am worried since my Grandfather also had it and I've been experiencing some loss of words, and forgetfulness, I may be next. I've had a recent MRI, is there anything I can look for on it? Would the radiologist had said something if they noticed any signs? Thanks!!

dancsfo

I think it's the dozens of small lessons such as those in this forum that you use so that you can try to alleviate headaches for you, reduce harm done by PWD to themselves and others, and avoiding problems from occurring in the first place, or redirecting a PWD before they do something dangerous. Unfortunately there is no magic bullet cure for dementia for most people. Some people claim there is, but don't get your hopes up when you hear about it.

There is a list of books on this forum that may help. Have you read any books so far on dementia?

As for you, if it's early enough, good diet, exercise and socialization can try to stave off dementia as it may work for some people. Some things like a Vitamin B12 deficiency may mimic dementia, so getting tested for that may be a good first step for you. Or urinary tract infection can aggravate dementia behavior.

Preparing for problems before they become a real disaster, as you are trying to do, is a great way to approach it. For example, preparing a home for dementia (hide toxic items) is an example of what you can do if PWD is living at home, or getting legal matters and finances in order before it's too late.

One idea, that I haven't read much about, is to to a "fire drill". Someone can pretend to be a PWD, and do things around the house and see what you may need to do. Of course, there's a bit of cheating here, since the fake PWD can be aware of problematic areas, and "attempt to do" things like drink bleach, turn on a faucet and intentionally forget to turn it off, or boil a kettle dry. But it can remind you of things to do before they become a disaster. Why do this? I think a lot of people possess wishful thinking and brush off dementia behavior as a one-off event. But look at it another way: You can be lucky 99% of the time, but one fire or wandering off and getting lost will negate all of that.

Another hint: There are no gadgets that will solve most of this. Certainly, a GPS tracker can help locate a lost PWD, but electronic gadgets are often too difficult to operate for most PWDs, are just insufficiently effective or at worse, can increase danger if they provide an incorrect illusion of safety. I favor simple solutions, such as preventing problematic things from being operated, like a stove. Talking clocks and such may sound handy, but if you forget the answer in a few minutes, it may be of little use.

All of this of course, depends on the stage of dementia progression.

H1235

Welcome. As far a navigating dementia. I would suggest educating yourself and being prepared. Make sure all legal matter are taken care of. A DPOA is very important. See an elder law attorney if you haven’t already. By learning more about dementia you can anticipate problems rather than reacting to them. Learn about ways to interact with pwd, therapeutic lies, not arguing, redirecting etc. These techniques can save both you and your lo a lot of grief. Have a plan in place for the next stages. Will your lo go to AL or get in home care? What Al facility will work best? Is there a waiting list? How will your lo pay for all the additional care they will need? Are you familiar with Medicaid and the requirements to qualify? Considering these things now will make things easier down the road. As far as concerns about you developing dementia, I don’t really have anything insightful there. You are not alone. Whenever I forget something I can’t help but wonder.

irene912

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/69575/new-to-this

You need help or it will break you. You caring for them? At least get some caregivers to help you, if you're caring for them. Even if they don't live with you, you can't do it alone. My mom has it, so I worry I'm next too.