Mother not cooperating with maid

farha shaikh

My mother ,aged 66,is not able to go to washroom by herself

We have maid,who helps her, recently she is not cooperating with her as well.

Other than my sister,she does not allow anyone else to be with her.

Need suggestions....to deal with mother

Also,she is hallucinating....she looks at herself in mirror and gets hyper...

Need some guidance to deal

H1235

Welcome! Could you cover the mirror in the bathroom? I wonder if this could be contributing to not wanting help in the bathroom also. Somewhere I read that some people with dementia don’t recognize the person in the mirror as themselves and can become embarrassed or overwhelmed with seeing their own reflection. If someone is in there with her in her mind that’s a crowded bathroom. I think I read this in the context of showering. Maybe your sister does something just a bit different. The tiniest thing may be the cause. It also might be time to talk with her doctor and see if medication is an option. Good luck.

Jackie M.

Hygiene is one of our biggest issues with Mom. 86, ALZ, mobility issues due to a bad knee and overweight. I stress about the hygiene. Every day she says she is just going to wash her privates. Most time does not want to change clothing. My 89 YO dad and myself are her cargivers. He is starting to forget things and has a multitude of his own heath issues but no dementia.

It is a struggle and very stressful. I have to get tough with her to shower once a week. She won't let my dad do it, plus he really can't. They have a small bathroom. What I have noticed is that safety and comfort are a big issue for her, as well as privacy. She is always cold so I stop the AC, make sure I have a few towels, all her clothes and creams inside the bathroom. Doors to the bathroom and bedroom are closed. We got a hand held shower and a bench for the stall and they help a lot. She likes perfumed soap so I make sure we used that. It still a struggle but once the water is on her, it seems like she enjoys it. Won't admit though. I am still the bad guy 🙄 but we get it done. Most of the time, she won't speak to me for awhile but then it passes.

I hope that helps.