Expectations of Employed Caregivers

howhale

My wife is stage 5-6 AD and at home. She is mobile, can communicate, although usually not correctly, still uses utensils to eat, is not incontinent, enjoys social time with others (not so much with me but that is not unexpected), exhibits confusion, anxiety and agitation. Medication has helped with the agitation and volatile outbursts and calms her anxiety a bit. I have caregivers daily for 5-6 hours to allow me time to grocery shop, appointments, rest (although not well), etc. My direction to the caregivers is to care for my wife to make her safe and have as good a day as possible. I do not burden them with expectations of cleaning, laundry and all that stuff agencies promote. Just care for my wife. Here is the issue about which I hope someone here can help. Caregivers often allow my wife to nap or sleep or just sit during their shift. If she initiates some activity they will go along to monitor or maybe join in somewhat. The problem is that when my wife is not active during the hours the caregivers are on site, she has a lot of energy in the late afternoon and evening during her sundowning period. She paces, cannot sit still, is seeking activity, and yet she does not want me to participate. The caregivers are female and she enjoys that companionship in her activities. When they allow her to "rest" during the day with naps, sleep or just sitting, she has a bad evening and worse night. During the night she will get up frequently to walk the hallway which requires me to assist her resulting in a lack of sleep. What expectations do you set for caregivers? What tips might you have as to activities the caregiver can use to engage my wife to stay more active which hopefully will turn into better sleep for us both. Sorry for the long message to get to the point but would sure appreciate any suggestions you might offer.

ronda b

Give them specific instructions on what to do. Take her for a walk. Do exercises of some type etc.

White Crane

what does your wife enjoy doing? As Ronda suggested, they could take her for a walk or do some simple exercises. Maybe get some coloring books and crayons or simple jigsaw puzzles. If you do laundry, save a basket of towels and she could help fold them. There are some simple games that she might enjoy playing. Talk to the caregivers they might have some suggestions.

Whyzit2

Have you considered a day care program for your DW. The one my DH goes to keeps him involved in a variety of activities from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. He goes 2 times a week but it is available 5 days a week. $95/day. He comes home happy and tired.

sandwichone123

Perhaps set up a schedule: walk on Monday, sort laundry into the machine on Tuesday, sort clean laundry on Wednesday, walk on Thursday, caregiver's choice or craft on Friday. One craft that is easy and affordable is making a meal or snack—cold foods, like you would do with a child. Making a sandwich if the ingredients are already out (one slice of lunchmeat, one slice of cheese, two pickles, etc. on a dish). Vanilla wafer, frosting, animal cookie standing in the frosting. Those types of easy snacks.

Joe C.

The caregiver I had was willing to take DW out to various activities. She took her to the movies, park, car rides, lunch with girlfriends and shopping. We still had 2 cars so I let the caregiver use our car so the were not their own and picked up all cost associated with these activities. My favorite activity was when She would take DW shopping at a local consignment shop where the owner knew About DW’s condition. DW would pick out all kinds of things to buy and the caregiver or owner would offer to hold on to her finds then slip them back on the rack. In the end DW would buy some item clothing or costumer jewelry item but would have forgotten about all the things she previously had picked out and she would come home happy with her new purchase.

howhale

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/234885#Comment_234885

Thanks. What is the agency or source of the day care program you are using. I would like to search locally here for something similar.

howhale

Thank you all. Great suggestions and I will discuss with the caregivers. I need the caregivers to do more than just be present and your suggestions will allow me to be more specific with them.

FTDCaregiver1

Hi hi whale,, I had careworkers in for my wife , 5 days a week, 8 hours a day. I found that if I have them do chores, laundry, cleaning the bathroom and other activities my wife would be active too, she shadowed a lot. Like you, I wanted all the help I could get to get her to sleep and stay asleep at night. Most workers like to sit, watch tv, keep them active and you have a better chance of keeping you DW active too. Oh, install a camera linked to your cell phone too. As a back up, I used some meds in the evening to induce sleep as well.