Leaning how to adapt.

huntr8701

Hi,
My wife has been diagnosed with dementia for over five years. I been taking care of her the whole time. Now things seem to get worse and I’m not sure when I should contact professional help. She was enrolled in the memory center for seven years. Just reaching out for the first time to learn what’s next for me to do. Thanks 🙏🏽

H1235

Welcome. I’m not sure what you mean by professional help. Some symptoms of dementia (anxiety, insomnia, paranoia, depression etc) can be treated with medication. So if she is not seeing a doctor, it’s probably a good idea to start. When it’s time to bring her to a facility for professional care, that’s a personal thing. I think someone here suggested it’s time when you feel a care team at a facility can give her better care than what you are capable of. If you are even considering a facility you should know that some places will have a waiting list. It might be good to get on a list. Mc is very expensive. You may want to see a lawyer to consider your options and figure out if Medicaid is an option for what she needs and how best to protect assets for yourself. In some states Medicaid might help with in home care. Sometimes our loved ones can respond better to a stranger (especially when trying to get them to shower). A local commission on aging may be able to help you out with services offered in your area. Keeping yourself in good mental and physical health is important. The percentage of caregivers who pass before their person with dementia is not good. You need to take care of yourself.

SDianeL

Welcome. Sounds like the time may be now. We usually say if you’re asking, then it’s time. Explain enrolled in the Memory Center and why isn’t she still enrolled? I would ask for a referral to a Geriatric Psychiatrist who is best to manage any anti Psychotic meds she may need. By professional help, what do you need? In home care? A memory care facility? Have you met with an elder care attorney to see what your options are for long term care? Read the book “The 36 Hour Day” if you haven’t already.

sandwichone123

The first things to do, if she can still understand and if you have not done so, is to get legal affairs in order: Durable POA (not springing), POA for healthcare, and financial planning including wills.

Next steps can include finding home care resources and visiting some memory care facilities. Even if you are planning to keep her home it's wise to know what resources are out there and to develop a plan B.