Memory care / Medicaid / quality of care in New Jersey VS New York

jessjess

Hello everyone,

I’m in the process of attempting to move my dad who is in the early to mid stages of Alzheimer’s from a retirement community in Arizona to the east coast where i am. There’s no other family around and we both want to be closer to each other. This process is beyond overwhelming.

I began my search a few months ago looking at assisted living facilities with Memory care that accept Medicaid as he has enough for maybe 2 years of private pay in his Ira.

It has been really hard for me to get a real sense of what these places are like over zoom meetings and many conversations with people working on commission. I was going to make a trip out there to compare but now I’m being told my only hope is this one place basically.

So my search started in New York and has been directed to New Jersey and then was narrowed down to one place extremely (suspiciously?) fast. I was told New Jersey is his only option for not risking being moved to a nursing home or having to have a room mate. Im usually Brooklyn based and i drive so either state is fine with me but it’s hard to tell what is best.

new york and new jersey have suuuuch different requirements for medicaid. The place that i feel slightly pressured to commit to is basically saying they will be taking all of his money from all accounts and income from social security and then they will take him. in new york.. i think your ira doesnt count as income? and with higher cost of living and his social security it would in theory be easier for him to quialify for medicaid in ny …. but the facilities are really that much worse/ harder to find ? i know i could use an elder law attorney but everyone I’ve spoken to so far is either registered in new jersey or new york and are pretty hard to get ahold of even for a consultation

really hard to get unbiased opinions / people who are willing to hear out my complicated situation…also i already paid some a ’ care solutions ‘ planning guy who actually hasn’t come up with many solutions for us. I paid him $3400 and was promised help and guidance through this whole process.. he was going to be the liaison between financial advisors and facilities and nurses and everything like that but that’s not what happened at all. So back to square one basically

anyone with experience with both New York vs New Jersey for Medicaid acceptance, memory care quality, “aging in place” , quality of food (renal diet), activities and socializing etc

As far as i know each state is going to take everything and help you only if you are at risk of like homelessness?? So if that’s the case … which one has better care ? If its comparable would it be worth it to look into protecting my dads assets (if ny?) to get him on medicaid faster?

Also if anyone knows any New York elder law attorneys that may be open to a consultation with me ..

Any advice appreciated

SDianeL

Welcome. Sorry about your Dad. I did a quick search and found this law firm that says they do ny & NJ. Looks like good reviews too. You could also try calling the Alzheimer’s toll free number 800-272-3900 to see if they have resources in your area. https://www.mamannalaw.com/?npcmp=dir:local:2607139:07450

harshedbuzz

@jessjess

Probably the best way to get your answers is to find an elder law attorney who is licensed in both places or at least familiar with both. Mom's CELA practiced in PA, but she had a good working knowledge of the rules in NJ. PA Medicaid does not fund a bed in a MCF, only a SNF.

It's really hard to get a sense of which state would have "better" MCFs as a rule. The quality and vibe can change with management changes and even what the current population looks like. The latter is especially true in those places that allow residents to age-in-place where you might find a situation where a large percentage of folks are in very late stages and not available for socialization.

The bigger piece is the training and understanding of dementia among staff. Ask about training and dementia-informed care. Ask aides how long they've been at the facility. The place we chose for dad wasn't fancy, but the aides were well-trained and paid better than most MCFs in the area.

Another concern is convenience for you. As dementia progresses, it is likely there will be ambulance runs for things like falls, UTIs, pneumonia, etc and it's critical for his POA/caregiver to meet that ambulance as it pulls in at the ED. The facility will send their residents alone.

Food seemed pretty marginal at every place I toured and given the number of residents, a special diet might not be available at a smaller place. Dad's MCF had about 30-35 residents; they generally offered a standard meal and had a backup soup/sandwich type meal for those who wanted something different. There were at least 2 daily activities that involved snacks (ice cream and cheese/crackers most days) as well which might be an issue. You might have better luck at a larger CCRC that has a MC unit. My aunt's MCF was in a large CCRC campus and they did offer special diets.

HB

easy23

I have an elder care lawyer referral for you in Bay Ridge Bklyn: Grimaldi Yeung Law Group. (718) 238-6960

Pauline Yeung-Ha is licensed to practice in NY and NJ.

I know people that have used them and are satisfied.

H1235

This link may help if you haven’t seen it.

https://www.medicaidplanningassistance.org/medicaid-eligibility-income-chart/

MN Chickadee

There are many scam (or at minimum irritating) places that claim to help navigate this process, but they are all in it to make money and often only recommend the short list of places that contract with them (pay them to fill beds.) An elder law attorney is your best bet for figuring it out. Once an attorney advises on which state would be better and what his personal financial timeline looks like, you might try a support group of the Alzheimers Association in that area. Other caregivers will likely have some intel. Word of mouth is usually the best way to get info on facilities. You could also ask the local chapter of the Alz Assoc if there are other online caregiver groups specific to NYC where you could get some more specific advice. Narrowing it down and visiting the short list in person is a must. They all have sales people who will tell you whatever you want to hear. The only way to really evaluate it is to see it for yourself, see the residents, talk to staff etc. Many places require 2 years private pay and then will accept medicaid after that so he is lucky to have enough in his IRA for that, it will open more options. It is indeed very expensive. Many people blow through their nest egg. A year of dementia care can be $130k or more so yes it goes fast. You are wise to be making this move now while he is still able to make the trip without too much trouble, and wise to be looking for answers and solutions before it's a crisis. This will all be an investment to prevent future chaos.

H1235

I specifically asked the assisted living if they accepted Medicaid. They said yes. When mom was close to running out of money I started inquiring about the Medicaid process. Turns out the facility accepts Medicaid but expected the family to pay the remaining balance out of pocket. I was never told this! My advice, be careful and ask lots of questions.