Just need to talk to my friends (200)

Carl I’m from Ohio. Retired health care worker. My sister and I care for our mom.

Glad pulmonologist got involved HB. Do not feel bad, what you are doing is not easy. It is also ok to cry because again, all this is not easy. You are doing your very best it seems and that is all any of us can do.

Iris glad you're feeling a tad better. It is amazing how quickly we get weak.

Beth sounds like you have a plan, busy as ever.

Judith always nice to get jungle cut back. Can’t help you with fudge, haven't made it in years.

No I use it for restless legs syndrome. And it has helped a lot.

Thank you for welcoming me to your group. I live in Missouri and retired to spend time with my wife, who was forced to retire by AD in 2017. We are 77 and live very quietly just outside town. No pets or other animals, but that's made up for by deer, rabbits, and turkeys that guarantee I won't have a vegetable garden here unless I do some fencing. Don't have time for that right now.

My wife and I lived on dirt roads in the Ozarks as children and remember raising gardens (and a hutch of rabbits in her case), using outhouses, and other rural tropes. We worked our way through college and have been married since 1967. Our one surviving son lives in a group home and we have no grandchildren, so we're pretty much on our own except for a couple of good friends.

Again, thank you for welcoming me. I'd bring some lemonade except . . .

Good morning

Carl I remember a lot of those types of things too.

Jerilynn I seem to have to clean in pieces and parts too.

Yesterday was challenging. I put moms clothes in a 5 gallon bucket with cold water. Then i sprinkled baking soda on and then drizzled Dawn on. Scrubbed that in with a brush. Then i scrubbed some Persil into that. They came out clean. Someone on here a long time ago recommended Persil. It wasn't strong smelling either so im happy with it.

Welcome to the group. From David 1946

Morning..….feeling better, but weak and tired! Supposed to stay in till at least Monday, but looking at 4 walls does not help my grieving. I am reading everyone's post and praying for all!

Ron

Hello everyone, I finally got to take shower for the first time since I broke my ankle my step daughter came over and helped me and it felt good after sponge bathing for the last week. I was afraid if my wife tried to give me a shower we both might fall. So my stepdaughter said she would help. I thought I would be embarrassed but she said don't worry.

I lived in Kansas City for about 25 years, does that count?

Carl…that counts…My husband grew up near the Plaza…KC is beautiful

Iris…depending on accessibility…

YOU'RE SO RIGHT

JeriLynn hope it works well for you too.

Iris i didn't wash them in the bucket. I just soaked them in it first, kind of like a diaper pail. I have sisters 10 & 14 years younger than me. I was the built in babysitter and there were no disposable diapers.

David what a nice stepdaughter.

Today presented more challenges. Yesterday mom was walking way worse than her normal. Told her I needed to call squad. She would not agree and started asking me to do things. I told her im not being mean but you need to do it yourself . Told her you were doing your normal yesterday and if you cant walk today something is going on. Well she managed to get up and get things done. I went back in afternoon and she was hanging in there. This morning at 3:30am she calls me saying she cant get her shoe on. She eventually got it on but was hollering while doing it. After while she calls me and says Mint I realize I cannot walk on that leg. So I went over and called the squad and she went easily. Test for clot negative. Lab work for cellulitis was negative but he told me that is still what could be happening. He also ordered CT of spine but results weren't back yet. Anyway we are getting a neuroevaluation.

Yes Mint lisa is a very good step daughter she treats me like I'm her farther. She has helped me and my wife on my journey to the Veterans home. She takes me to alot of my appointments . I thought she would be embarrassed about helping me "wash"me.

Good morning,

Mint, I hope your Mom is ok. Will be praying for her along with you, HB's Mom. And Ron, Iris, Caro, David and Jo C. Be well dear friends.

Today is birthday celebration day for the 20 year old that I took to NY City. We (DD, 2 Grands, 1 GG) are going to brunch and shopping. Next weekend is the great granddaughter's birthday so another celebration day.

Yesterday was BUSY. One of the goats has a snotty nose and has to have antibiotic shots, another is wormy. The new stove got installed. Went really well. Cooked before that and then after went to Scottsboro to deliver food. Went to Publix grocery to pick up free birthday and anniversary flowers and small cake. Went to TJ Maxx for birthday gifts and new "step-ins" as my Grandmother called them. TMI but I have reverted to "granny drawers". Ugg. Bought a new shirt and tennis shoes for me. Still did not work on the closet. Went to an Estate Sale on the way home and bought an olive oil dispenser, a vintage but very usable dutch oven by Wegmann, a Corningware tea kettle (my broke years ago - all the women in my family have had one) and 3 metal barrels with lids for goat/chicken feed 6$!!!! Then home where thankfully supper was ready in the crockpot. DH went to be at 7pm.

Sunny, hot and dry here. Burn bans in effect.

Judith, I'm really a "city girl" that just lives in the country with a good ole redneck that knows how to "do stuff". I did spend my summers on the dairy/row crop farm that I now live on, but everyone still calls me a city girl.

Everyone have the best day possible. I'm off to shop till somebody drops or my credit card does, lol.

Good morning from mom's kitchen window. It's supposed to be a lovely day but I'm chilly at the moment. I'd bump up the heat, but mom's been "running warm" on prednisone and is more comfortable when the house is cooler. I'm in the front of the house a little more than a car length from the sidewalk so the dogwalkers get to admire my ridiculous ensemble— an LLBean Scotch-plaid bathrobe in blue with a tan houndstooth Thinsulate vest. It's a look.

Jerilynn— I love me some Persil but DS and DH have sensitive skin and it's just not practical to wash my stuff separately unless it's something that has special care instructions.

My mom would envy you your trip to Publix. When she lived in FL it was her "happy place". In the weeks leading up to mom's crisis hospitalization for autoimmune hepatitis, whenever I called to check in on them and she didn't answer I'd call dad to ask how she was, and he would often tell me she was at Publix or the pool. He even told the police that when I asked for a well-check when nobody answered for 2 days. He lied, of course, she was too weak to get out of bed. Because the story about Publix/pool tracked, it was about 10 days before I got concerned.

Mint— DH did feel kind of poorly after his TDap but he also got the RSV jab and was fighting off the cold I caught, so it's hard to say. When I got it a while back, I just recall the tender injection site for 2 days.

When I have something that needs soaking for dirt or odors, I often add either borax or washing soda to the detergent. When DS was in scouts and marching band his clothes were disgusting. Teen-boy stink is real. He still gets pretty grimy— a hot summer day riding behind a coal fired locomotive in a white dress short is also a laundry challenge that requires borax/washing soda and a 24-hour soak.

Judith— I am more of a mid-boomer suburban girl. I did live in Philadelphia as a toddler, I attended college in the city and did a semester living in London but I'm back in the small town that became the 'burbs now. I do go into the city pretty often. My bestie is a dyed-in-the-wool city girl. She lived in an inner ring suburb during her first marriage but bounced back within the city limits when she married her second husband who was a judge in municipal court and required to live in the city. She's very "city". Once when I was driving my son somewhere, she called me (on Bluetooth) in a panic because she was driving through Lancaster County to a quilt store and saw some cows lying down. She asked me, in a panic, if that meant they were all going to die. My son laughed so hard Coke came out his nose. Ironically, her new house is near the city's agricultural high school. Every once in a while, livestock will get loose in the neighborhood which she finds exciting.

David— Mom would agree with you on the first shower thing. After 10 days on the telemetry unit with one sponge bath, she enjoyed her first shower immensely.

Lorita— You were wise to call ahead. It's so frustrating when you make a trip to do something and it ends up a waste of your time and gas.

Ron— I'm sorry the recovery is slow. Same here, unfortunately.

Your fear of your pants falling down reminds me of something that happened to DH recently. DS, DH and I went to the county courthouse to renew our passports. We just missed the window to do so online. There were metal detectors and guards at the entrance. One was a trainee. DS went first and was putting his belt back on while the trainer was showing the newbie how to use the wand (my artificial knee set off the scanner). Meanwhile DH had removed his metal and was waiting to walk through when his jeans dropped to his mid-thigh. DS and I lost it. DH has always been very tall and fairly thin, but he's recently lost weight on the advice of his cardiologist. He's probably a 36 or 37" waist, but he needs a 36" inseam at least and those can be hard to find.

___________________________________________________________________

Mom Update.

She seemed a little better. Her O2 on 2 liters is still 88-92 at rest. She's a very dysfunctional breather, so I've been spending more time on the deep breathing work with her. When she's focused on something, sometimes she holds her breath. I've found that putting on mindless TV or comedy useful in distracting her.

I was able to swap out the minivan for a cheaper subcompact: Chevy Spark— pretty barebones but I'm saving mom $40/day. I stopped home for a bit and got more clothes as I think I'll be here at least through Monday evening.

My BFF dropped me off meals for mom. There were 6 servings of no-salt added homemade manicotti, 4 of mushroom spinach cannelloni, and some roast turkey and sweet potatoes. Plus, no-salt cookies. She also brought an assortment of cookies for my family. Alas, the visiting nurse ran late, so I didn't get to visit and thank her properly.

DS came by in the afternoon, at my request, to cut down her perennials and pull out the annuals. He missed the peonies but it saves me having to do all of it with my lousy knee. I was able to send him home with the cookies, so he was pretty happy.

My niece and her bestie came for dinner and pitched in to entertain mom and help with some chores I hadn't gotten to. We got the guest room de-furred so I was able to sleep there last night. I accidently trapped the cat under the bed when I put the Roomba in there and closed the door. She is not a fan. The carpet looks great but the cat glared at me all night. My niece also swapped out the porch decor from spring/summer to fall; I'll dig out her fall garden stakes and Halloween cat tomorrow.

Niece is coming back with her husband to make a late lunch for mom. While they're here, DS is picking me up and we'll have a nice lunch on the river. I can't wait.

HB