Have any questions about how to use the community? Check out the Help Discussion.

New obsessive behavior

Julie882121
Julie882121 Member Posts: 3
First Comment
Member

My 94 yr old mom with dementia has always enjoyed listening to music, especially the music of her youth. She sings along often, remembering the lyrics. I have searched for and found about 25 CDs of very old music that she enjoys. In the last couple of months, she has started clapping with the music instead of singing. It has gotten obsessive where she claps nonstop and claps really hard, often getting herself overheated. No one is allowed to talk to her while she’s clapping. She gets very angry if interrupted. I don’t know if I should try to stop the crazy clapping or just let her do it. She doesn’t have much enjoyment besides music because she is legally blind and cannot see the TV. She can only rarely carry on a conversation. She enjoys eating but otherwise, she has little to occupy her besides music. It just seems the clapping is more like work than enjoyment for her. I’m not sure what she thinks she is accomplishing with the clapping, but it clearly isn’t enjoyment. It isn’t with the beat and she continues clapping even in between songs. Maybe I’m worrying for nothing. I do have caregivers that come 5 days a week for 4 hours who play games with my mom and have her do easy puzzles, etc. but if my mom asks for music, then the clapping starts and the caregiver isn’t “allowed” to interrupt her.

Comments

  • MoniqueV2024
    MoniqueV2024 Member Posts: 9
    First Comment
    Member

    my only thought is the movement could help soothe her nervous system. while it is upsetting, I would allow her to do what feels best for her to express and potentially release her feelings.

  • SDianeL
    SDianeL Member Posts: 1,424
    500 Likes 1000 Comments 500 Care Reactions 250 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    Trying to get her to stop will cause more anxiety and possibly agitation. I would not turn it off once it starts. She’s not thinking anything. She can’t reason. Her reasoner is broken. Many repetitive behaviors by dementia patients are caused by anxiety. Does she actually ask for the music or are the caregivers just turning it on for her? Can you distract her with something else? More calming music? Is she on anti anxiety medication? That might help.

  • SDianeL
    SDianeL Member Posts: 1,424
    500 Likes 1000 Comments 500 Care Reactions 250 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member
  • Julie882121
    Julie882121 Member Posts: 3
    First Comment
    Member

    I have music on for her most of the day. She doesn’t always clap, but when she does, it’s pretty frantic at times. The caregivers only turn it on when she asks for it. I don’t think she’s anxious, she just doesn’t have anything to do and she was always a very active person. No anti-anxiety meds. I want her to enjoy herself to the extent possible, so if this is what she wants to do, I won’t stop her. Thanks for your thoughtful reply.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more