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Tomorrow’s the big day; wish us luck!

lilacgirl
lilacgirl Member Posts: 94
Eighth Anniversary 25 Likes 25 Care Reactions 10 Comments
Member

We are moving my mom into an AL near me tomorrow. (If you have not seen my previous posts, ever since my dad died in December she has been living alone 2.5 hours away.) She has been cooperative and somewhat willing to do this, which even one month ago I would never have dreamed possible. But still makes lots of comments like, “If I don’t like it, I will just move in with you” or “Maybe I’ll be moving back home in a week if I hate it.” So that’s a little unnerving. But hey, getting her there in the first place is half the battle, right?

I wrestle with lots of guilt and second thoughts. Like, maybe I pushed this too soon. But then she’ll say something so completely off the wall that it kind of confirms our reasons for doing this. Like last night she was sitting in her living room and thought she was already in her AL room….
Anyway. It’s a big day for us tomorrow and I appreciate any good vibes sent our way! Thanks!

Comments

  • pamu
    pamu Member Posts: 137
    100 Comments 25 Care Reactions 25 Likes 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    Sending you well wishes and good vibes! I think we all wrestle with our decisions for our LO's even if we know we are doing the right thing. Getting her there is definitely half the battle. I'm sure she'll feel comfort knowing that she'll be closer to you now so you can see her more often.

  • AmandaF
    AmandaF Member Posts: 70
    25 Likes Second Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    Sending good luck and good vibes! Yes, just getting her there is at least half the battle, possibly 3/4 of it. Hope it goes as smoothly as it can!

  • harshedbuzz
    harshedbuzz Member Posts: 6,940
    Ninth Anniversary 1,500 Insightfuls Reactions 1,500 Likes 5000 Comments
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    Good luck tomorrow.

    I hope everything goes smoothly for you both.

  • easy23
    easy23 Member Posts: 444
    Sixth Anniversary 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Likes 100 Care Reactions
    Member

    Good luck tomorrow! Try not to second guess yourself. You are doing the right thing!

  • H1235
    H1235 Member Posts: 2,342
    1,000 Likes 1,000 Insightfuls Reactions 500 Care Reactions 1000 Comments
    Member

    I hope everything goes well. Don’t sweat the small stuff during the move. Forgotten items can be purchased at the store or can wait til your next trip to her house. Set your expectations low, getting her there with basic necessities. The rest can be worked out later. 🤞

  • jen ht
    jen ht Member Posts: 235
    100 Likes 100 Care Reactions 100 Comments Second Anniversary
    Member

    Thinking of you and wishing you well 💜

  • psg712
    psg712 Member Posts: 787
    250 Care Reactions 250 Likes 500 Comments Third Anniversary
    Member

    One day, one moment at a time. You are doing the right thing for your mom. It will be painful for both of you, but you will make it through.

  • caregiving daughter
    caregiving daughter Member Posts: 179
    Legacy Membership 100 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions 25 Likes
    Member

    Thinking of you! We understand that this is all very difficult. Do record things that your mom may have said or done. At times of doubt, it is helpful to read through to remind yourself that you are only trying to keep your mom safe.

  • Svetabasu
    Svetabasu Member Posts: 1
    First Comment
    Member
    I am new here, my mom diagnosed with cognitive decline about 1.5 month back
    Coordinator told us to start process for LTC
    I feel guilty and trying my best to keep her at home, but I don’t know how long I can do it..
    Feeling same as you do, when your mom changed a lot , started behaving aggressively and weird
    Probably, it’s only one way we can do to keep them safe
    Good luck
    My best wishes

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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