Just need to talk to my friends (160)

Iris L.

Lorita, I once asked my cousin, who was born in 1925 and grew up on a farm, how bad was the great depression?  She said they didn't know there was a problem, because they raised their own food, used wood for heating and cooking, had a mule for farm work, and used a wagon if they needed to go into town.  The only things they had to buy were flour and sugar.  

My sleep is still erratic.  I was out of bed at 12:30 pm--too late.  I didn't even get dressed today.  I couldn't get myself going.

Zetta, I stepped on my big cat Adam today.  I just didn't see him.  When I first moved to Los Angeles in the early 1980's, it was popular for homeowners to shine a light on their decorated dining tabletops for passersby to see.  Nowadays people tend to keep their lights off or dim.  I can tell they are home because I see the TV or see shadows moving or hear voices.  But they are walking around in the dark.  I have a northwestern exposure and my living room is always dark, now worse in winter.

Iris

Mint

47F, 8C.  High 55 today, sunny but very windy.  We have been having a lot of wind.  

Lorita stress is the cause of many of our problems.  Know this is true for myself.

Lorita I have accepted and do not let it frustrate me that frequently I have to leave a message.  Also will have to wait to get things done.  Remember I waited 31/2 months on my door.  Most people call me back fairly promptly.  My nephew works in a large department store and said some of the contractors are telling them they are extremely busy and not to give their name out to anyone.

Lol I eat yogurt and fruit mixed with honey for breakfast sometimes.  Crush up a graham cracker and mix in too.

Well not going to get to experience making my own lard.  The butcher shop called yesterday and when I picked it up was lard not fat.  Lard full of preservatives.  So will not ask again.  They tried and I appreciate that.  Actually got a message from Amazon that my lard has been shipped.  So much faster than what was stated when I ordered it.  Has no preservatives so will stick with there if I decide to get more.

Lorita would  ask Sam, maybe you already have, is there ways of selling your land  that is best regarding tax consequences.  Would think you would pay taxes based off of the value of property when you obtained the land.  If he has always done your taxes would think he would have that, as would think your obtaining the land would be part of the tax record the year that happened.  Maybe I’m all wet about that, just a thought.

Don’t think I have ever seen the lone star brand here Lorita.

It is fairly dark here by 5pm too.  Frequently going to bed at 5-5:30.  Nothing better to do.  Try not to fall to sleep til 8:30 but don’t always make it.  I’m just am bored.

Zetta like to let the sunshine in normally too.  A lot of people keep their window coverings closed all the time.  Find letting day light in good for me mentally.

Iris never see lights on in many neighbors houses here either.  Have sort of joined them.  Had two electric bills this summer a little over $200.  Had never had one that high before.  Became very aware of watching and trying to keep it down.  Would rather spend my money on other things.  Hope you feel a little better today.

Have been cleaning out my desk drawers.  Mom gave the desk to me and there were several little notebooks in there that were my dad’s.  He was the one who used the desk.  Was looking through them.  He had death date of many people in there including his own.  Have looked through them from time to time but had  never noticed that before.  Had a good cry.  Was 19 years ago today, miss him so, when he was well he always encouraged me.  He would be 89 if still with me.

Take care everyone

Lorita

Morning, or afternoon, depending on where you live.

 Zetta, for the life of me I can't remember how and when you fell.  I'm 98% computer illiterate so can't look back and find it.  Glad you are feeling better over it.  My doctor said I wouldn't fully recover from my fall that was a little over a month ago for three or four months.   I see now why they always are cautioning older people to "not fall".

 I'm guessing and finding out that stress is probably one of the hardest things to get rid of.  There's always something coming up to stress a person out - even watching the world and/or local news.  Just this morning I called OPM (Office of Personnel Management) to get a new form for designation of beneficiary on my life insurance.  Of course, got a recording saying they were having lots of phone calls (something like that) and to call back.  Seems like everywhere you call you get a recording or are on hold for long periods of time. 

 Sara - why do you want to make your own lard?  Messy business - lots easier to use Crisco.  I was so glad when they started making that.  I grew up eating everything made with lard so guess it doesn't hurt anyone.  I think I see lard in stores but like you said probably has a lot of preservatives in it - like everything else you buy.

 You were very patient waiting for your garage door - didn't realize it was that long. So glad you finally got it and are satisfied with it. 

 I guess having to wait on things bothers me more than it should.  Not really a very patient person on some things but guess I'll have to learn better.

 It's another beautiful day - sunny and calm winds.  Supposed to be 78 this afternoon - wish we could have this weather for a few weeks.  All the girls are laying in the shade.  This morning three little ones came up to the creepfeeder with one babysitter while all the others were still grazing.  I haven't actually seen a baby in the feeder but maybe so.

 Judith, just talked with Sam again this morning.  I've been going through old, old papers and finally found a paper where the land was sold to my parents - for $4,000.  Can you believe that?  But, that was in 1936 and that was still at the end of the depression.  So, I'll have to pay taxes on whatever I get from it with just a few thousand off.  Everything we've bought to work it has been depreciated out with the exception of fencing and even some of that so won't get much help from capital expenses.   I think I've spent about $8,000 on new fences but $6,000 of that was in 2015.  He's going to think about it and run the numbers and get back to me.  Also asked him what he thought would be best - to sell everything with a lifetime entitlement to live here or just the land and will the house when I leave this world.   Hate doing all of this - just wish - I don't know what I wish - maybe to be young again and not have to think about this.  Of course, this won't happen.  Darn this getting old!

 Going up to get Gator gas later today and I think I'll call Darwin and see if he'll tell me what the average per head was that he got for his cattle. I know he was sort of worried about that.  Was going to get a good number from some cattle company but they never came so I'm a bit interested on how they settled. 

 Mineral rights - M and I discussed this a while back.  My parents were able to obtain all the mineral rights.  If you own mineral rights to only the top of the land, they can come in and drill anywhere they want to - even making roads to the rigs and you have no way to stop them.  We have leased land to oil companies in the past but there's no way I'd do that again.  They can't drill within a certain number of feet from your house but if I didn't full mineral rights (above and below the ground)  they could come in and drill between the house and pond and I couldn't stop them.  So much to think about.

 People north of here a few miles have leased hundreds of acres to companies that might want to put in solar panels (just for a few dollars an acre).  If they decided to put in the panels it would ruin the land forever to run cattle.  They have to put concrete bases way below the ground to support the panels.  And - wind turbins, too.  That's one thing I know M wouldn't do - he wants to take care of the land and keep it like it is.

 Sarah has called the last couple of mornings.  They took her to Saint Anthonys instead of Mercy.  She's been given transfusions of platelets and will probably go home today with appointment to see a blood doctor. 

 I have the abstract to the farm going way back - kind of interesting to see who all lived here during the last way over a hundred years.  We've been here 85 so guess that's part of my problem or hesitancy.

 Iris, be very careful with your cat.  Our floors are dark and so are the cats and in the dark it is hard to see them.  I keep the drapes closed in the LR, too.  Not sure why.  I used to put up lace curtains in the summertime and it was so light.  Then, in the winter I used insulated drapes with sheers underneath - so, that's what's been up for a long time.  I have lace curtains and sheers in the south side of the house and it is light in there.  So, I have a lamp on almost all the time in this part of the house. 

 Need to clean out under the kitchen sink and call the plumber to replace the drainage pipes.  Also, see about the drain from the kitchen and washer - doesn't go into the septic tank so I think leaves have gotten down in there and maybe stopped it up.  Always one thing, or two, or three.....

 Back later.

ladyzetta

Lorita,     I took the fall a week ago today. I'm at my daughters, house and I had taken Molly out on the back porch to do her thing in the yard, and as I was standing on the top step, I got too close to the edge and fell to the ground, it was not a big drop, only two steps up. I fell on my knee I just need to be more careful. Iam fine now Iam just so clumsy at times. Hopefully you can get the stress under control, so you are able to make all these decisions coming your way. 

Iris,   Sorry you fell on your cat I hope the both of you are O.K. I have little night lights all over the place, so I don't bump into a cat if I have to get up in the middle of the night, as I do each night a few times.

I am helping my daughter get stuff packed they leave at 5am tomorrow headed to the airport, they fly to Fort Lauderdale, Florida and two days later they board the ship for the cruise. Molly, Sammy and I will be house sitting and taking care of their three cats while they are gone. I am glad all these critters like each other. 

I am wishing you all a good day. Hugs Zetta 

Lorita

Zetta, you were so luck you weren't hurt badly - that can be a bad fall.  I thought I was okay except for some pain until the second week, then I realized I wasn't.  So just be careful.

It was a most beautiful day - all kinds of high temperature records were broken - one place got up to 80 - unheard of in December - well, not really I guess because it has happened before. 

Decided I'd go up to our little, bitty town and get some Gator gas while the weather was good.  I felt okay so put the last of the gas I had in the Gator - then Stormy and I left.  That little convenience store was jumping - at least there were all kinds of pick-ups and construction trucks but as I got my gas people were leaving.  I take four gas cans and fill them about half full - can't lift five gallons into the back of the car.  Also filled up the car - didn't even notice how much gas is.  I had gotten rainbow sherbet there before so thought I'd get some more.  Put on my KN94 (I never can remember if it's 94 or 95).  One man went in before me and there was the clerk and one other person inside -  no masks.  Got a little package of glazed doughnuts for Stormy and an ice cream sandwich to eat on the way home.  He would have nothing of it, nor would Sheena when we got home.  I laid the pkg. on the kitchen counter and two or three hours later thought I'd try one.  I had forgotten about the ants that are still with me sometimes - one bit me on the lip and it hurt.  Darned ant, anyway.  They didn't taste good either - the doughnuts, not the ants.  I spit out what was in my mouth thinking there might have been an ant in it. 

When we got home I backed up fairly close to the carport and took out the gas cans and carried them to the carport.  Since then I've been pretty much wiped out.  My back (from the costo) is hurting like the dickens.  I am leaning on a heatjng pad and just took a pain pill.  Guess that shows me what I can and can't do. 

Went out and filled the water tank - some of the girls are coming back up to get a little bit of liquid feet and a drink of water.  Did see Venus in the SW sky - supposed to be Jupiter and Saturn but didn't see them.

Going to have to read up some more on life Estate.  One thing I just read says the person living there retains ownership until they pass away, then property goes to the remainderman.  Does he got ahead and pay for the property?  Guess I do need to see the attorney.  I'll see what Sam comes up with. 

It's hard to believe my parents paid $30. an acre for the farm - but that was 85 years ago and the end of the depression.  Wonder what $4,000 back then would be today?  I know they worked so hard to get it paid off.  We lived here from 1936 to about 1948 when they sold out, except for the farm, and leased it for a year.  I can only imagine how much daddy hated to do that.

Saw on the news there are cases of the new variant in more states and that the drug companies are thinking about tweaking their vaccines to cover it.  I'm afraid this will go on and on and there will be more shots and more shots - but, thank goodness for them.

Hope all of you had a good day - seems like Friday to me. 

loveskitties

Lorita,

I think you need to find out when the land was titled in your name and use that as the starting point for capitol gains calculation.  Probably going back to state/local tax records to see what they valued the land and what they valued the house and land it sits on.  If you only sell the land you do not want to include the house and land that it sits on.  

You qualify for a reduction because you have kept the property for more than one year.  How much of a reduction is also impacted by you annual earnings.  You may also be able to take off some for improvements to the structures on the land.

Lots to consider and will take a CPA or lawyer to work it out for you, but better than paying way too much tax!

loveskitties

$4,000 in 1936 would be worth between $75,00 and $80,000 today from what I found with Mr. Google.

jfkoc

Lorita....I think there will be a "step-up" on the property. That will help a lot.

Mint

Good morning 

36F, 2C.  Suppose to rain this morning but very little wind.

Lorita crisco has soybean oil in it.  Have hypothyroidism which soy is bad for.  So eliminate soy from my diet the best I can.  Wish I had been aware of this before I developed hypothyroidism, maybe I could have avoided getting it.  Was very aware that I was genetically predisposed to getting it, but not aware soy was bad for thyroid.  After the first year of eliminating soy they needed to drop my medicine in half.  Was hoping that maybe eventually my thyroid could recover and I could get off the med.  It has been several years and no sign of that so far.  Guess you can always hope.

Sorry that it sounds like S has developed even more issues.  

Believe Marie is correct that you will only owe taxes on capital gains that occurred since the land was in your name.

Take care everyone

BethL

Sara, are you familiar with the work of Izabella Wentz, PharmD?  She is an expert on hypothyroidism. She was able to go into remission herself. I have not read her books however here are the titles: "Hashimoto's protocol: A 90 day plan for reversing thyroid symptoms and getting your life back,"  "Hashimoto's Food Pharmacology: Nutrition Protocols and Healing Recipes to take charge of your thyroid health,"  "Hashimoto's thyroiditis: Lifestyle Interventions for finding and treating the root cause."

We have been having GREAT weather here - 60's the past two days and will be in the 50's today; then it gets colder. Sara, maybe "I" can send you some of the 60's.... lol

I started working on my Christmas cards yesterday and so far have around 15 done. I used a photo I took (barn/trees/snow falling) and had cards made. I actually didn't get enough made and will have to send some store bought cards to complete my list. I will send a little over 20. My mom used to send and receive 100! She lived in a  town of 400 all her life and was the postmaster and knew EVERYBODY!

Lorita, I know you are hurting thinking about changes in your life. Monumental changes. Have you considered hiring Mike to feed for you, prior to getting all the details for a purchase worked out? It could remove some time stress.

Zetta, I'm thinking of your daughter cruising and hoping I can take a few more cruises. The way the pandemic is going, it could be awhile. 

Blessings to all.   Beth

Lorita

Morning,

 Partly cloudy here this morning, still warm and calm wind. There was a pretty big fog this morning but it dissipated pretty fast after the sun came up.

 Thanks for all the information and suggestions - still don't know what I'll do.  This morning felt pretty good so swept some and my back really hurt. 

 Judith the step-up and also what you talked about Marie is based on if the place was inherited, at least that's what I got from reading about it.   I didn't inherit the place it was quit claimed to us in 1995 before mother passed away.  So, the basis, I think Sam called it, goes back to the time it was originally purchased.  There will be some capital improvements to deduct but most have depreciated - except the new fences. 

 Sam did suggest we could use at least ten acres as residence and that would lower or exempt taxes up to $250,000.   I know I'll eventually sell but maybe for now just sell the girls and lease the land to him and worry about selling next year.

 Beth, Mike is already feeding hay for me and is going to fill the creepfeeder (every 2-3 weeks) - I wouldn't ask him to do more - he has lots of cattle to take care of plus running his clinic.  If I did sell the cattle to him he would feed or his hired hand would and also I wouldn't have to worry about getting them up to sell in January.  Just don't know yet.  Maybe the time to have thought of all this was back in the summer or early fall but I felt better then.

 Just called Bryon to see if they didn't have other work this weekend if he and Shane could come and cut some sprouts, put new cord on the flagpole and help me close the north barn doors.  I could close the big doors but the cowshed needs a new door but maybe they can get it together enough to last the winter - I can do one door but not the other. Sounds like I'm crawfishing but just trying to figure out what the best thing to do is.

 Still have 30 feedsacks to get together for trash Monday - really seems like Mondays come around really fast.  Also still trying to get in touch with OPM - same thing - recording says to call back. 

 Sara - had no idea what was in Crisco - just knew it was plant-based.  One of the women I used to carpool with had hypothyroidism - also seems like she had her thyroid removed but not sure about that.   Is your mother doing all right? 

 Hope all of you are well this morning.  I'll be back later.

jfkoc

I would sell. That way you know the land is in good hands. If you were to die then ultimately Tod would end up with the money. Sam can figure out the best way for you and hopefully Mike will agree. 

I just do not see any benefit to selling the cows and leasing the land but then I am not privy to all the info.

This decision is rough but I know that you will decide what is best for you and the land as well. You will do what secures both. Get all the fact and do not lose sight that one of the two thing must be done ASAP.

 Life rolls on whether we like it or not. UGH! 

Lorita

Hi,

 Judith, this is the hardest thing I've ever dealt with - that I had control over if you know what I mean - and you do.

 I've shed more tears and had more sleepless nights than I ever imagined I could have - and still no definite decision.  I know leasing would just prolong the ultimate decision. You know I feel better and think I can do something but I do it and then hurt like the dickens and am worn out.  I had 30 feedsacks I needed to roll up and put in big, trash bags so just did that and I'm exhausted and hurting - the costo is really bothering me.

  I took a couple of letters down to the mailbox just now and thought I'd drive the PU a bit so drove down the road toward D.'s. He was outside so went down to the next section line, turned around and when I came back by he was still outside  so  pulled into the driveway.   We only talked a minute because he was afraid D. would see us.  It was so good for us to see each other - almost made me cry.  My emotions are over the top - I can cry at the drop of a hat.  He said he'd called the ambulance to take her to the doctor a few days ago - remember I mentioned I'd seen the ambulance turn in his driveway.  She wouldn't go so he's trying to get caregiver - something - so he can make her go.  This is what happened with Patsy.  The ambulance came, twice, and she wouldn't go and they couldn't make her.  I told him to give me a call when he could.  Poor guy - he said he hated to because he had told her he wouldn't call me and hated to break his word to her.  One of the four best men I've ever known.  I told him I needed to talk with him.  Was going to ask him about what he got for his cattle.  I'm not sure he'll chance calling but at least I saw him and know he's okay.  I know the decision was equally as hard for him.  When he was making it, we'd talk and he would say he didn't think M. would cheat him - and I don't think he did or would.

 Seems like the older we get the harder life gets - too  many decisions to be made and no one really to help much.  When we were younger these decisions weren't so hard to make.

  But, then, I think - what would I do all the time?  Guess the same things I do now with the exception of feeding and worrying about the weather and getting the feed.  I would, indeed, become a recluse. I know what to do and what needs to be done - just have to make myself do it when I get a little more information.

 Thank you for understanding - I know you do.  I appreciate all of you putting up with this ongoing drama I'm dealing with.  Sorry about it.

jfkoc

I just read this;

"I didn't even know what to do with myself," Neff Hernandez said. "Every single thing about my life changed."

So what you are facing on top of selling family property is retirement. Some can't wait for it...others dred it. I think the difference is what it means to the person.

I know when Dick died I felt at loose ends. I had lost my "job". I knew I needed something to fill my time but it took maybe 4 months to act.

It would be great if you had in mind something of interest. I suggested chickens. Not a lot but enough to feed and water and have some fresh eggs. You could have more and sell them or you could just take them to people. 

If you sell then you could buy that Jeep and come over to OKC via the back roads. 

I promise you that you will find stuff to do.

You know the anti-depressant is likely to take the edge off. Give it a chance. 

Until then we can sit on the tree limb and stare  into space.

ronald71111

Lorita, in sorry your going through do much right now. My heart aches for you! It will be hard on you to sell, but once it's over you will feel better about it and knowing it's in good hands will help.

Zeta I dont know how you handle so many pets. My brother brought his dog, my sister brought hers and my littlebit made three driving me crazy. I dont know what I was thinking but my sister is going to Florida to spend the month with her daughter and I volunteered to keep her 2 year old rat terrier. Having problems sleeping right now due to Lou waking me up several times and now foolish me excepts another problem. Hopefully it all will settle down!

Ron

Lorita

Hi,

 Well, I got out and did a little bit of work and I feel better.  I went through the whole last winter with a hole in the liner of one of the bunkfeeders.  Years ago we bought an extra one and a while ago I remembered it.  Finally got it into the back of the Gator and into the bunkfeeder.  It was flat and the feeder is curved so took a little bit of doing - but got it done.  Then did a little work on the back door of the cowshed but there's shoveling to be done before it can be closed and wedged in.

 I took Sheena and Stormy with me.  Sheena had the best time rolling in the grass while I counted girls.  Stormy rode down, of course but both of them walked back to the house.

 So peaceful and calming just to sit out in the pasture and watch the girls and babies - I should do that more often.  Sweet Pea and Tina are growing and stay together most of the time.  Keeping the new babies up a couple of weeks will probably change - most people don't do that.  The little ones and new moms are in the pasture all the time. 

 Judith, I remember when you first had someone to help a little bit with your caregiving so you could get out and do errands.  The first day you said you just sat in the car, not really knowing what to do.  Caregiving takes a lot of work. 

 This would be like my second retirement.  I retired in 1995 and started doing this fulltime instead of after work and on the weekends.  Just a change of jobs.  I know I can still go out and be with the girls and act like they're mine when I want to. 

 Darwin called.  I had the phone in the house but heard it ring but by the time I got to it he had hung up.  Looked at the number and it was one number off from his I had written his down wrong in my phone)  but I called back and it was him.  He's been having a really hard time the last eight months - says he's going down.  He's a small man and 85 and looks fragile now.  She's very jealous and suspicious so I still can't call him but it was really good to see and talk to him a few minutes.

 It's cloudy now, or was, when I was outside and a little cooler.  I called the propane guy who's going to finish cleaning the heater.  They've been shorthanded this week - several people off with the virus.  Says everyone should be back Monday so he can come the first part of the week.  I'm a little worried about having someone in the house who has been around it but I can stay out on the porch and I will open the windows even if it is colder.  Haven't heard from Daniel so guess he hasn't heard from the lumber yard - everything seems like it's moving like cold molasses.

 I'm watching National Lampoon's Vacation.  I've seen it a few times but it's funny.

 Judith, I think my travelling days are over - don't even like to go to town and what would I do with the cats and GPs?

 Guess I'd better stop and find something for supper.  Enjoy the evening.

  

jfkoc

You put them all in the Jeep!

Iris L.

Lorita wrote:

 Seems like the older we get the harder life gets - too  many decisions to be made and no one really to help much.  When we were younger these decisions weren't so hard to make.

  I was thinking the same thing just this morning!  My life use to be so straight-forward.  Decisions were EASY!  Now I'm stumped.  And tired and worn out.  I know how I feel makes a big difference.

I got a few errands done today and I'm tired again.

Iris

Mint

Good morning

27F, -3C.  Suppose to be sunny and less wind.  We have had a lot of fog this year Lorita.

Beth I’m not familiar with Izabella Wentz.  Thank you for the information.

Use to send cards on all occasions.  Stopped doing that several years ago.  You posted a picture of the card and remember it was beautiful.

Lorita dementia of one person can really turn a lot of people’s world upside down.  So sorry that you can’t have a good conversation with D. Know he is someone you trust and was able to depend on in the past.  He understands your situation first hand. 

You asked about my mom.  She is still the same. 

As couple of you said, life gets harder for many of us as we get older.  A neighbor I once had said getting old is not for sissies.  

Ron your sister has been kind to you and you wanted to help her out.  That is why you took on an extra dog.  Hope it goes smooth for you.

Lorita you have a good plan for dealing with the workers.  If the weather would be so you can’t set on porch just stay in a different room.  Have your KF 94 handy.  So when you do need to deal with them wear it and you will be ok.  Personally don’t mind wearing it so I leave it on the whole time.  Whatever you are comfortable with.

Take care everyone

BethL

Sara, I was thinking about you making apple cider vinegar and wondered why you make it yourself? I bought a bottle of it and have had it for a year or more. I only use it in recipes that call for it. I also have white vinegar (I clean with that), balsamic vinegar, white wine vinegar and red wine vinegar. I often make my own salad dressings with those. Wondering what you use the ACV for? As I said, a bottle of vinegar lasts me a long, long time - a year, or more. I know some people drink it, for various health reasons.

Well, the cooler temps have come. 31 F this a.m. and should get up to 45. Will be watching men's basketball tonight on t.v. Will make a chocolate chess pie today. Church tomorrow morning. Watched an online church service last night and the pastor spoke of a book, "Praying the Word for your church." It's a 31 day program to pray for your church. I am going to get the book. Prayer is important in my life. 

Have a good day!    Beth

Mint

Beth vinegar I buy use for cooking lasts me a long time too.  It’s just one of the things I enjoy just knowing how to do.  When I cook something and you know how the pan sometimes will have a white or rainbow look on it once it dries after washing it.  Don’t like that, want them to shine.  When I empty the pan I pour in just enough vinegar to cover bottom of pan and let it set til I do the dishes. Will be sparkling clean when I wash it without using bar keepers friend.  It’s free and sort of fun to me.  Guess it doesn’t take much to entertain me lol.  Buy cheap o vinegar for this when I run out of my own.

Jo C.

Hello!  Been working on multiple items and up to my eyeballs but sure have been thinking of all of you and it was good to read and catch up.  Lorita, I am so glad your checkup went well and no hint of an early pneumonia with your chest pain.   Once you get your labs back, you will know with certainty what is what; that is always good and also gives an opportunity to adjust things if something comes back just a little off.   Those labs are kind of like an "early warning system," especially when one has begun their "mature years." 

Heaven knows; you sure do have a lot causing stress, and that you are feeling down is certainly understandable.  Please do not feel sorry about talking about all of this; we are your friends and we DO want to hear about it.  I am just sorry for your distress and wish I could make it better.   Perhaps the low dose antidepressant will help.  It can take several weeks for it to work and sometimes it can cause a bit of tiredness at first which will pass.  Just have to take it every day as prescribed; they sure are not an "as needed" med.  In fact, if going off an antidepressant they usually must be slowly tapered under a doctor's order.   Gosh; what we "mature" folks really need is a magic wand!  Poof! and it's fixed. 

Your decision is probably the hardest one you have ever had to make in your life and it is one of deep heart and emotions; that is very understandable.  The tears are because of how much you deeply care and how life will change.   Like Judith, I think I would opt to sell rather than lease.  Reason being, leasing leaves you at risk with the ranch should something happen to you (heaven forbid) and you would not be able to address the issues or perform legalities.  For sure,  would be good to have that contract written air tight re your ability to own the house and a small amount of the land until you are gone and where you have rights to drive and access the property.  You are doing the right thing in talking to a good lawyer and finance folks.  Bet your land is worth more than you think.  It is a beautiful piece of property.

Iris; I am delighted to hear that you are able to go grocery shopping.   Your Posts re the deep severity of your fatigue had me concerned that you would not be able to do such a physical effort going up and down aisles pushing a cart; glad it is not that bad.  Because of the level of described fatigue and that you have a cardiac condition, that was why I asked if a doctor's visit would be a good idea.

My husband and DILs Endocrinologist retired.  Trying to find a new one in our broad area Iris, and wow . . .. there is a definite lack of said specialty with good track records.  I have spent hours searching.   One that was highly recommended and has good ratings just went from private practice and now practices only in the Optum HMO which is Memorial Medicals HMO over all their hospitals.  Hate that bundling and they are losing their nicer human touch. It is evident.  Ka-ching! $$

Zetta, what a good idea about how you plan to return home before your daughter and SIL hit the house after their trip.   Very smart.  So hope the pass will be easy to drive over with good weather and really good road conditions.  Snow, ice and wind begone!

Ms. Sayra; you had an interesting childhood too.   We were also a very poor family and at times did not have food or adequate heat in the winter; house chilly in the north of Michigan.   When I mention mother baking; that happened in earlier years far and few between.  She was great at it, but it did not happen routinely.  Wore second hand clothes from others and happy to do it.  Worked from the time I was ten years old and when 15 1/2, I had two jobs and did well in school.  Did not think anything about it; it was just what one did. 

NOTE:   Everyone has a story about their lives and I find it fascinating.  How about sharing your life story folks?  It would be intersting to hear how each of us grew up, what we did, how we moved forward in life, what was the most interesting job you ever had; if you worked, what was your profession?  What obstacles did you overcome if any?  So much to know and value about the human experience . . . Ron; we could start with you!  You are an interesting person and I am sure there is a lot to share. And Judith, Sayra, Iris, Beth, Lorita, Zetta, Ex-Tex, loveskitties, and the rest of y'all . . .

 Had to laugh last night.  I went into the guest room to read on the bed as DH watched TV in our bedroom.   I fell asleep; deep asleep.  Woke up, saw the clock which said 8:50 . . . I was still half asleep and thought, "Oh my goodness, I slept SO long; time to get up for breakfast and began to plan what I would have.  Then I moved out of the post sleep fog and realized it was NOT tomorrow, it was still tonight and not even nine p.m.  Geeze.  Did make me laugh as it had seemed so real.

Sayra; the lard.  We always got lard at the grocery stores.  It comes in rectangular red boxes and find them in the meat department.  It is always very clean and good quality.  That is what is used to make the crust for cornish pasties which I sure do love.  Thought about Lorita's ants that got all over her newly bought donuts. One time when I was baking chocolate chip cookies, I opened the new bag of Toll House chocolate chips, poured some in my hand an popped them in my mouth . . . (cooks privilege), something felt odd, I spit them out . . . .EEEEK/YUUUCK!  White worms!!! In the chocolate.  I have never popped chocolate chips in my mouth again and inspect them carefully.  Ugh.  That'll teach me.

Judith, did the pictures from the ball come back yet?  How was the occasion, fun, lovely or a boring bust?  One never knows what will be, but bet you looked wonderful.

  Goodness, I have lots paragraphs three times now; even at the beginning and even when I used Sayra's technique of doing edit to carefully contain the information.  I know I can write on my own site and transfer it here - but then I cannot scroll and remind myself of something someone else has written so I can address it.  This is the only place that I have this problem.   Oh well; in the scope of the universe, it is tiny potatoes.

I am going before it hits me again and as it is, I have just written a very long and boring missive.

 J.

  

Lorita

Hi,

 It's one heck of a dreary day - foggy, misty, cool (58) and, of course, cloudy.  FedEx just came and you could see the truck tracks.  Jack called early this morning to get the weather report - he and Patsy always relied on me to tell them about the weather.  Told him it was going to be better this afternoon.  Was I ever wrong.  He was going to wait until afternoon to go so hope he made it all right.  He has ripe cataracts and doesn't see too well.  He should have gone yesterday when it was 78 and sunny - but, I do the same thing - putting off going until I have to.

 I haven't done anything today except feed Tom and Jerry.  They're such sweet black and white cats.  I've fed them every day for the last several years and they still pull back when I try to touch them - if they're eating sometimes I get to pet them a minute or two.  Saw the girls and babies, at least some of them - didn't go out in the pasture.  My costochondritis is hurting like the dickens and don't know why - haven't lifted anything much so must be the way I slept.

 I got quite a few bananas when I was in town and wanted to use some of them before they turned black so made a couple of loaves of banana bread - in the oven now for another hour, almost.  Need to make apple crisp but maybe tomorrow.  Still haven't done those stinkin' dishes.  Sandy, sorry, fell behind and didn't keep up with them - but, I did better for a while.

 I've been watching Gunsmoke, Rawhide and the Big 12 Championship Game in Arlington, TX.  It was Okla. State and Baylor.  How in the world OSU beat OU I'll never know - sure didn't play well today.  Twice they were on the one yard line - had four tries and didn't get a TD.  So, Baylor is the Big 12 Champion. 

 Jo, haven't gotten the lab work.  He wanted to do the whole fasting thing and it was mid afternoon so I'll go back later - think my appt. is in early March.  He knows me well - gone to him for years.  Funny, he said "why don't you come to me with something I can cure?"  I haven't taken any of the pills yet - keep thinking about that other time when I tried antidepressants and how my hands shook.  I will though - maybe they'll take the edges off. 

 I've sort of reconsidered what I think I might do - sorry about going on about this but you all are the only ones I can really talk to about it.  I think I may sell everything to him and have a Life Estate for the house and carport.  No problem with entry into the farm.  It sounds pretty safe and if something happened to him before it did to me, it would still be in force.  I've met two of his daughters but you just never know.  Does this sound right - if you have a life estate you still retain ownership (although you've received payment for it) until you pass away or end the life estate.  I'd still be here and so would the girls so it would be like it was mine except he'd be taking care of it and the girls.  I'm saying all this without really talking to him much about it.  This is all contingent on if I get the price I'd like.  I told him $4,000 an acre a few weeks ago (just kidding - we were talking about something else) and he said "if I can pay it out".  Like he'd need to.  Wish there was some way I could count from the time it was deeded to  me instead of when my parents bought it - but seems there isn't.  We'll see what Sam comes up with. 

 I've kind of gotten away from the lease idea - there would still be the problem that might occur when I leave this world.   I'd want the sign with the name of the farm over the arch at the entryway to remain and, of course, Billy the Bull would have to stay and never be sold.  Maybe he'll agree to that.  Everyone knows where it is when you mention the name so don't want that to change.

 Just too much to think about.  Still haven't heard from Daniel but I think I'm safe from the snakes but it needs to be taken care ASAP (the house, that is).  Think I'll call the plumber Monday and have them replace the drain pipes under the sink and check that place outside where washing machine water comes up instead of draining.  I bet anything somehow the cover to the thing came off and leaves got in there.  I did put my hand down in it a while back and got out a lot of leaves, then thought about snakes.  Also have at least one of the frost-free hydrants is leaking and I need that fixed before freezing weather - it's the one close to the barn and I use it to fill the water tank out there.  So many things to think about and all I want to do is sit and watch Gunsmoke. Guess you could call that burying my head in the sand.

 Zetta - please be careful when you drive home - don't start if the pass or passes are snowed in.  Just take this time to rest and watch westerns on TV and enjoy the cats and Molly.  Be careful walking with those kittens around your feet.  You know how fast you can go down.  Seems like you're falling forever though.

 The one little Gerbera Daisy is so pretty and still blooming.  Sara, I think you're right about them getting established the first year.  I see a leaf from one of the others - I planted three - I think I'll put lots of leaves over them this winter and maybe they'll grow next spring.  I still have one Knock-Out rose that's trying to bloom.  It's a pretty red one and there's been beautiful, little blooms on it the last couple of weeks -  no leaves, just blooms.  It's the one that's in the area where I have new moms who love the buds.  The wild violets have quit blooming but the Royal Empress trees are absolutely full of buds for next spring and I'm still seeing blooms that have fallen off.

 Talked to Amazon today about returning the door seal and I think he found oen for me that might work - just ordered it.  Guess I'll have to cover the PU cab this evening before the rain tonight.  Need to go to the mailbox - I think there should be some Muk Luk cabin socks in it.  I have some long ones but these are shorter so should be easier to get on and off. 

 Sara - every time you or someone else mentions lard I think of watching grandma make it after we'd butchered hogs.  Awful thing that was - seeing them hanging in the trees, draining - but, that's what everyone did back then.  Doubt you'd see it hardly anywhere now.

 Jo - I was born in this house on the first day of summer, 1942 - in the front bedroom.  It was on Sunday and the house was full of company. They made home made ice cream on Saturday night and mother said she was in labor but wouldn't tell grandma because she wouldn't let her eat ice cream if she did.  It was very rainy that morning and daddy had to ride his horse to get the doctor, several miles away.  I was stillborn, they thought.  Doctor was caring for mother and grandma happened to see my foot move.  I think my eyes were swollen shut for a while - I had the cord wrapped around my neck.  I had a very happy childhood - only had my sister with me for about five years until she married.  Loved, absolutely loved the farm.  I used to ride my bicycle in the cattle trails - just the right width.  Went to a country school, then business college after graduation because I didn't have shorthand in school.  Went to work at the VA Hospital in 1961 and retired from there in 1995.   Wonderful place to work and that was where I met Charles - love at first sight for me.  He's part Cherokee and Osage and had dark brown hair and eyes and looked so cute in his white uniform (nursing assistant). 

 After we got married in 1971 we bought a travel trailer and moved to one corner of the farm, then bought a big MH a couple of years later and lived there until 2000 when we moved to the farm house - just before a big icestorm when we were out of power for two weeks.  Did have one propane heater so we didn't freeze.   Had almost 44 wonderful years with Charles.  Hard to believe he's been gone almost seven years.  That's my story - you all know the rest.

 Anxious to read about others - think that's a good idea to learn more about each of us.

 Didn't mean to write a book so better stop and go cover the PU cab and check the banana bread.  Wish you all were here to have some with me - a nice cup of hot tea and banana bread with a little bit of butter on it.  Sounds good to me.

 Enjoy the evening.

Iris L.

Sayra, where do you live that it's 26 degrees?

Jo C, the other morning I dreamed I was sleeping on a twin bed and I heard a knock on the door.  It was a wood door knock, not my screen door knock.  Nevertheless, I got up and out of bed to go to the door to check.  Of course no one was there, because it was a dream!

My sleep is so erratic that I try not to pay so much attention, because I would be continually dumbfounded.

Lorita, your life story sounds nice.  Except for Charles passing, of course.

Iris

ladyzetta

Hello All,

Lorita,  Your life story is beautiful thank you for telling it. It reminds me of Little House on the Prairie.  Not that your house is little but the love and memories that you have. The decisions you have to make are going to be very hard to make. Mike thinks a lot of you he will make sure you are protected in every way. As far as the antidepressants, it might be good if you try them if your hands shake maybe only take 1/2 of the pill and if you can't cut them in half have the Doctor prescribe you a smaller dose. 

I am glad you finally got to talk to Darwin, maybe as his wife declines, she will get over this jealousy. the friendship you all had is worth a lot, and I know you miss that. Hopefully he continues to call and as you know a fiblet is good for all.  I did like the idea Judith, had about you raising chickens. That will keep you busy and I bet your neighbors would like the eggs. 

I was able to watch Rawhide today. My daughters TV gets MeTV so today I have seen Gunsmoke, Rifleman, Have Gun will Travel, Rawhide and now I am watching Wanted Dead or Alive. 

Thank You for all that are concerned about me traveling over the mountain. I will be watching the weather reports and go when the time is good. I am in no hurry to get anywhere so I will wait till I know traveling will be safe. 

Ron,  That was nice of you to offer to care for your sisters' dog. The first few days will be crazy but believe me things will settle down and littlebit will probably like having a playmate. I love being around animals, not so much people. animals love you no matter what. 

Iris,  Please be careful if you get up and answer your door while you are still kinda of sleeping that does not sound too safe. Maybe put a lock on the very top of your door to prevent you from wondering outside and locking yourself out. Or opening your door to a stranger. Just a thought. 

Beth,  My daughter loves to cruise, and she does it often it's a benefit she has working for the cruise line. Part of the cruise was canceled due to covid, she said there was a place the ship was going to stop at but now it will continue on to another stop. I hope they don t get docked and unable to get off when They return. They are in Florida right now they board the ship tomorrow for 5 days. 

Good night to All, Hugs Zetta 

Lorita

Iris, were you surprised when you opened the door and no one was there?  Dreams can seem so very real.  Do you dream often and are they in color?   I think I dream every time I sleep - nap or nighttime and I think they're in color.  My mother used to dream a lot and when she'd dream about her mother, she would be almost sick with sadness the next day.  My dreams make me feel better - just like I'm with the person I'm dreaming of.

 I forgot to mention when I posted last that I never saw a calf or pig or anything born until I was at least 29.  In those days girls on a farm (at least around here) were sheltered from things like that.  Carol said she was sheltered, too.  Daddy and mother used to raise hogs and once we had some little pigs.  Daddy always said a cow or hog "found" the little ones.  We were in the barn looking at the little pigs  and curious person I've always been, asked him where she found them.  He pulled back a little board in the hallway that covered a little hole and said she found them in that hole.  The first time I saw a calf born I was going to work and happened to see a cow trying to calve. Hurried back home and got Charles and we pulled the calf.  I cried like a baby - birth is a wonderous thing!  Since then he and I have pulled who knows how many calves and I've seen all kinds of things.  Now, I wouldn't attempt it by myself - afraid I'd get halfway and couldn't continue.

 Iris, my grandmother (mother's mother) came to live with us when grandpa passed away seven months before I was born.  She was with us until she passed away in 1969.  I used to watch her cut up chickens and do all kinds of things - learned so much from her.  She was a really good cook but never used a recipe - just a little of this and a pinch of that.  She used to bake a lot.  She's make the cake batter, then bake a spoonful of it in a pie pan to see if she needed to add something.  She used to let me lick the bowl and I loved to do that and eat the test cake with it. 

 When I was growing up I worked with daddy a lot - asking questions, of course.  We chopped corn and cotton together, pulled bolls and picked cotton, shocked feed stalks after he'd harvested the heads, hauled hay - just about anything you can think of.  When Charles and I got married (he was born and raised in town) we continued to do those things and he loved it.

 I have a picture somewhere in my pictures on the computer I'm going to try to find and post.  It was taken from up close to the MH and when you drive down the road east of us, it's what the place looks like.  When Charles and I would be coming home from town and get to that place in the road, I'd always say "I wonder who lives over there?" and we'd laugh.    I better stop, I'm getting sappy.

 Haven't tried the banana bread yet - waiting for you all.  It looks good.  Jo, forgot to mention I bought those doughnuts for Stormy.  Offered him one and he turned up his nose - Sheena wouldn't eat one either.  That's when I thought I'd see how they were.  Something was on my lip and an ant was biting me.  Just saw a show on TV where an Indian staked aa man out close to an anthill - bet that would have hurt.

 Rest well tonight.  Hope all of you sleep well.  Iris, maybe tonight will be better for you.

ladyzetta

Lorita,  That picture is beautiful.   

BethL

Lorita, I like tea too. I primarily drink Smokey Earl Grey and green tea with jasmine. What kind do you like? I know Sara has made her own herbal teas from herbs in her garden.

Sara, good idea regarding the vinegar in your pans to ship them up! Another way I use vinegar is to put baking soda and vinegar down the sink drain, let set for a bit and then pour in hot or boiling water. I also shine my sinks (ie remove soap scum) with baking soda. I think it's fun that you do your own fermenting, including ACV.  

My story: I have always lived in Iowa. I grew up in a town of 400 with my mom, dad, and younger sister. My big thing was horses. I got my first pony when I was 11 years old, and after that had Quarter horses, just one horse at a time. I had the privilege of participating in quite a few horse shows - such fun! My first job was detassling corn. The tassels are removed from seed corn so it doesn't cross pollinate. That was hot, dirty work in the sun (sunburn and corn rash ensued). My next job was at a Tastee Freeze. I became interested in medical things and took a CNA course while in high school, and then worked at a local hospital as a CNA. After graduation, I went to a 3 year nursing program. Later I went on to get my BSN and MSN. I worked in ICU/CCU, ER, OR, taught freshman nursing students, did Utilization Review and Quality Assurance, and worked with electronic medical records. Also taught chiropractic students how to "avoid" getting sued for malpractice - went out to the chiro. colleges all over the country - that was fun. I have been married for 45 years and have a grown son and daughter and 8 grandchildren. I have been retired for nearly 11 years. I love traveling and have been to every state, Australia, New Zealand, the Caribbean and several European countries. I really love cruising. I used to be a runner and once participated in a marathon, making it 23 miles before calling it quits. I also like to swim and I like going out to lunch with friends, and, of course, gardening. We live on a 1/2 acre suburban lot, and most of our backyard is garden. Mainly flowers but some vegetables and we also grow blueberries and rhubarb. We've grown cherries, raspberries and blackberries in the past. Life is good. I am blessed. 

ronald71111

Jo, not much to it, but here we go.

I grew up in the city, but had a lot of relatives in the country so can relate to a lot of Lorita's life. I was the youngest of four and was the "wild one" of the four. I was never really wild, but did enjoy having a good time. While my siblings were studying hard I barely got by due to my studies of life itself. Girls were my most popular course and worked harder studying them than my other courses.

I came from a middle class family and was taught at a young age to earn my own spending money. At the age of 10 I was peddling peanuts and popcorn at local games, rodeos, concerts are any other events. I also worked weekends at a watermelon and produce garden. There were picnic tables in back of the establishment were we sold slices of ice cold watermelons. I also worked part time there after returning home from the service. The owner had offered me partnership if I ran the garden while he supplied it, but having a young family and the knowledge of needing to be there 12 to 14 hours a day, 7 days a week and not being with my family much, I declined. 

My oldest brother went in the navy and spent his time in Naples Italy and other brother was army and spent his time in Hawaii. Never being out of Louisiana, Texas and Arkansas I decided it was time for me to see the world. I joined the army and went to fort Polk Louisiana, fort Gordon Georgia, Vietnam and fort Campbell KY. 

I met my beautiful wife Lou at Fort Campbell and have enjoyed over 54 years with her with two boys, 5 grandchildren and 2 great grandchildren. I had always wanted a girl but after I second child Lou told me if we had anymore I would have to have them, so I decided a girl wasn't that important. 

In the service I was trained as a cryptographic operator but at Fort Campbell was assigned to the Military Police. I was NCOIC (non commissioned officer in charge) of the Provost Office when I left the service. I met Lou at the Airbase club at Fort Campbell. She was sitting with a table full of girls and I asked the prettiest one to dance. We danced one dance and talked the rest of the night. We saw each other every night and was married three months later.

After the service we came back to Louisiana and I went to work for Western Electric manufacturing branch. The government thought Western Electric was to big and made them break up. Manufacturing became AT&T, which decided to break off the telephone portion which became Lucent which broke off its business phones which became Avaya. After 34 years we the companies Avaya sent the job to Mexico and I was forced into a early retirement. I was able to find another job with the DHS as a TSA screener. I didn't care much for passenger screening and applied for a office job as communication center specialist which I worked at until second retirement. After two years of final retirement Lou's dementia set in and you know the rest.

Sorry for the long history, but this was the short version. 

Ron

Mint

31F, -1C.  Iris I live in north central Ohio about a hour south Of Lake Erie.

Iris since I have lived here there has been two times when I thought I heard doorbell ring during      night.  The second time made me start wondering  if I was dreaming it.  Guessing I am.  

JoC I write little notes as I’m reading.  Once you edit like you said you can’t go back and forth between posts.  Have wondered if going back and forth between posts is cause of me losing my post.  

We have had more fog than usual this summer and fall Lorita.

Looked up Life Estate.  Seems like that would be ok as far as I can tell.  If you haven’t already talk with your CPA and M.  Had never heard of that.

Your farm is beautiful.  Think putting the leaves on top of  gerbera’s once  cold is a good idea.  Lorita that is why we are all sitting on the front porch, to listen and eat banana bread.  One day we may need you to listen to us. 

Use vinegar, soda and hot water in my sinks too  Beth.  Eight grandchildren, how nice.  You have lived an interesting life.

Nice to hear all you have done too, Ron and JoC.

Feel like you already know all of this lol. Was born in a very rural area of Kentucky.  Dad moved us to Ohio when I was seven, to find work.  He eventually saved enough money to buy a small farm, when I was in high school.  I was the oldest of five girls.  After graduation became a Respiratory Therapist.  Worked at same hospital 42 years.  As a Respiratory Therapist you work in all areas of the hospital.  Was a very stressful job at times but also very fulfilling at times.   Retired 3 years ago to garden and cook I guess.  Doesn’t take too much to make me content.

Take care everyone