Need some word tracks

cgrubb78

My Mom has been in MC for about 5 weeks. She’s not happy to be there but is slowly settling in. I live 6 hours away so most of my interactions with her are over the phone. I struggle with coming up with good answers to the same questions she asks me over and over again. “How long do I have to be here”? “Who do I talk to about getting out of here”? I try to stay vague and say things like “I’ll have to look into that” or “I’ll have to do some research and find out”. I’m not sure if those are the best responses because they’re leaving open the possibility that she could get out. Any suggestions for better responses? And any advice for redirecting someone over the phone? Most of what I read about redirecting applies more to in-person situations.

TIA

harshedbuzz

@cgrubb78

I think you're handling it well. Especially as you aren't local.

Are you the POA or is someone else making these decisions? Asking, because if it's just you, it might make sense to move her nearer where you are.

If she's got a spouse or someone else in that role, I would ask what story they're using for her to be in the MCF for the sake of consistency. We told dad his doctor wanted him to get rehab. This allowed us to validate his desire to come home while not having control over the timeline. Over time, he stopped asking.

I'm sorry you are dealing with this. It's very hard to converse with PWD even when they still have relatively intact speech and language skills.

HB