Just need to talk to my friends (194)
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Good morning rockers.
I was up too early and may go back to bed when DH gets up. I think the dinner and drinks I had last night disagreed with me. My niece and I met in the city for hair appointments and grabbed an early dinner. It's fun to catch up. She's the one who lived with me for a time and I kind of miss our chats.
@JeriLynn66 wearing the new boots home sounds exactly like something my mom would do. LOL, once when she was in high school, she picked up a new pair of glasses from the eye doctor and saw frames she liked better, so she had her best friend run them over with her car so she could claim she needed a new pair.
@ronald71111 So not your gumbo? Here I was thinking you were in possession of some lovely vintage Werner Magnalite and had an impossibly clean stovetop.
@Lorita Poor dear Sarah. Was she in a hospital setting for the stress test? I know a heart attack is a rare occurrence with stress tests, but I'm surprised she wasn't admitted for observation at a minimum. Perhaps she had angina-- that can be very painful. My BIL suffers with it.
Mom's scheduled for a nuclear stress test on Friday. I need to double check the prep for it. She's supposed to avoid caffeine for 24 hours prior, eat a light breakfast 4 hours before and bring a snack and caffeinated beverage with her. I don't know what to expect from this-- they said to expect to be there 4 hours but that she might be sent home early if she doesn't tolerate the medication used to stress her system so I guess I'll hang around. I'll be happy when this is done; she's not been her usual scheming bundle of energy of late.
HB
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Morning, Mint and everyone. We slept in this morning. No reason to bet up early I knew the taxes were wsiting. I need to do a few dishes first. It's a beautiful morning. Warmer outside than in. Before I got up I heard Stormy and Sheena waking up and thought how lucky I am to have them. Our neighbor had a dog and once told Charles and I that the dog was his reason to get up in the morning. He no longer has the dog. I think it's sad.
Don't work too hard yodsy, Mint. Hope it goes well.
HB, I'm not really sure where Sarah had it done but I assume it was in the hospital. She has a dental appt. today. Don't know how she can feel like it. She certainly has greater fortitude than I. I hope your mom's test goes well.
Better go and get my juice and see where GL is. Back later.
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Judith already said she would post her gumbo receipe, so I'll give a couple of louisiana shrimp dishes.
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Ron, the shrimp etoufee sounds good. Never made it but Charles would have liked it.
Not feeling up to par but better than earlier. Did get the dishes done but I have lost my potato peeler. I like the kind you can use like a knife instead of the one with a wide blade. Probably threw it out with peelings when I made soup. Cooked a pound of brown beans with potatoes on top a couple of days ago so divided them in two cup containers and froze them. Will be good when my stomach is up to it.
Stormy is getting the ruff on his shoulders. His hair has always been smooth but the last month or so it has fluffed up from his neck to about a foot back. Looks cute.
Quiet and nice here today. Not too cold and not too windy. I bet a person could count the number of calm days we have during the year on both hands.
Hoping I feel like working on tax papers later this evening. Can't imagine where I got a stomach bug. I do wish we could hear something from Jo. Joan, I think of you often and the move you have a head of you. Take care.
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All this talk of Justin Wilson reminded me of when he was on the local PBS station. I'm not usually one for cooking shows, but DH loves them. Back when he'd put this show on, my old Persian cat would perch on the arm of the sofa loaf-style and watch him intently. Sometimes he'd even drool. I don't know if he was a fan of Cajun cuisine or drawn to Wilson's manner of speech, but the cat never missed a show.
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Commander’s Palace Gumbo
Large roasting chicken cut up
season with salt, cayenne pepper and powdered garlic, set aside 30 minutes, shake in flour, remove but reserve the flour, brown the chicken in 1 c vegetable oil and remove,
Roux
Loosen bits left in the pan, wisk in1 cup of the reserved flour, stir until dark brown, remove from heat
Vegetables
Add 1 ½ celery, 2c onions, 2c green pepper, stir constantly,
Transfer to Dutch oven
add 6c chicken stock and roux and bring to a boil stirring
Lower heat
Add1 ½ t minced garlic 1 lb diced andouille and chicken
Cook until chicken is tender @1 ¾- 2 hours
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Well, the gathering of the tax documents is as complete as it is going to get.. have an appointment Friday to deliver to the accountant. Already delivered DH's to the Shop accounting firm. I will say dealing with the Office of Personnel Management rivals dealing with AT&T on the frustration chart.
The "lean to" additions to the barn are complete and DH is happy as a pig in slop to be able to get his new "Shop" in order. He's been moving stuff out of the garage all day and moving equipment and is one tired but happy man. One of our suppliers for the Shop "bought" our phone number and that process is complete as of today. Now to mail in the internet modem and that piece of work will be done.
I'm ready to start thinking about the upcoming trip to NYC with the granddaughter and getting on with retirement! To that end, I have a hair appointment next week and surely need it.
Gotta jump in the kitchen and put some dinner out. Thanks Judith for the gumbo recipe!
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Judith, your gumbo sounds like mine except I use down home sausage instead of andoulee.
Ron
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Congratulations, JetiLynn. Bet that feels good to get the taxes done. Worked on mine some more today. All I need is to get the income together and review everything. Sam sends a form to fill out showing all of this but I don't use it. Our PO closes at noon so don't know if I'll make it tomorrow. I've sent mine in to him the last three years and it works well.
What are you going to do in NYC? I'm sure you'll enjoy retirement. You'll find you work just as hard but it's different.
HB, that is so funny about your cat watching Justin. Does he watch other things on TV? Everyone, hope you enjoyed the first day of Spring. It was beautiful here. I've noticed thousands of tiny, , tiny, Dark purple, four pedaled flowers about an inch tall - some kind of violet, I guess.
See you all tomorrow.
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Today when i was driving I saw something beautiful. Wish i could have taken a picture but was on a major highway. No way to pull over. I saw crepuscular sun rays
. I didn’t know what they were. I messaged my nephew and described it. He knew what it was. Most common at sunset but saw these at sunrise. Im going to try and attach an image i found on bbc.com that is the closest I could find to what I saw. It was much prettier though.
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I bet it was beautiful, Mint. So many pretty things to see if you will just look up. We have beautiful, unusual cloud formations here in Oklahoma. Have you ever seen a sundog or a roll cloud? Very unusual.
When I was posting earlier I forgot to tell you all about something I saw and wondered about. I was filling a tub with water for Gray Lady. The hydrant is beside the corral fence + seven pipes high and almost 6 ft. High. I saw something on the top pipe sitting against the gate post. Thought it was a pretty shiny gray rock so touched it and it moved! It was a ptetty, little, gray frog. Now, how in the world could he have gotten up on that pipe? Last year I saw a tiny frog on the spout of the hydrant just sitting there. Nature is really something--+ cloud formations and little frogs.
How did your day ho, Mint?
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Good morning all front porch rockers! Having some early morning coffee before my trip to the VA for the VNG/Balancing test. Hope all is well with everyone!
Ron
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Good morning Ron. I'm up too, coffee in hand. The moon is so bright this morning!
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@jfkoc That recipe looks amazing. I may have to give that one a go. I bet the house smells amazing with this on the stove.
@ronald71111 good luck with your tests today.
@Mint That must've been a beautiful sunrise.
@JeriLynn66 NYC? Which granddaughter is going with? The little shoe-maven or someone a bit older? What are your plans while there? Shows, shopping, fine dining, museums and culture? I don't get into NYC often enough. I keep promising myself a trip to Mood Fabrics as the Fabric Row area in Philadelphia is not as grand as it once was. My best friend and I have done overnights for shows and a little shopping-- we usually do the 1/2 price tickets from the TKTS booth.
@Lorita The cat didn't watch any other TV. None of my cats were much for TV viewing-- the old TVs weren't really compatible with feline vision so that kind of makes sense. My mom's old cat would watch TV but he was a real nutjob. Mom would put nature shows on for him-- when the prey would run off the screen, he'd run around to the back to see if he could figure out where they went.
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DS is going into Philadelphia this morning. They're moving Battleship NJ to dry dock around noon today and he plans to watch from Penn's Landing. It's a little chilly, but the weather is gorgeous. He should get some amazing pictures anyway.
Can I vent about "the mental load in general and my mom specifically?
The mental load is something about which younger women vent. It's the part of "adulting" that requires a wife in a marriage to be responsible for carrying all the informational pieces of running a household and family-- things like meal planning, appointments, what needs doing in general for everyone in the house. I used to pooh-pooh this until I made the connection that the metal load is a big part of the burden caregivers feel when their PWD leaves them responsible for every task associated with running the household and both lives.
Mom's making me crazy. She's always been a kind of ADHD scattered but lately, I find myself taking on more and more of her stuff. Some of this can't be avoided as I do most of her appointments, but it feels like sometimes she is weaponizing incompetence to rope me into doing more for her than is necessary.
My mom has 4 medical appointments this week. We decided together than I would schedule her blood draw on the same day as the dentist and that she'd have my niece's friend drive her instead of me. Friend is out-of-work following some rigorous cancer treatment and could use the money. Friend is a bit dippy but a good soul. This should be a win-win.
On Tuesday evening, I touched base with mom to remind her to make sure the phlebotomist draws blood to run both the BMP her cardiologist ordered, but also the liver function tests her hepatologist ordered as I am all about killing multiple birds with a single stone where possible. I also asked to be certain she had the prophylaxis antibiotic on hand ahead of her dental cleaning and reminded her to take in one hour before her appointment to give the medication a chance to enter her bloodstream. Last time I took her, she had the damned pills in her purse with the intent of taking them there. I was early enough that she took them on time, but I did stress that she needed to take before the appointment as directed on the damn bottle.
Yesterday around noon, I was tempted to call and remind her about the pills but felt maybe that was a bit of an insult to her intelligence, so I didn't. When I spoke with her last night to say hi, she shared that she didn't get the liver panel run because "they only had 2 people working in the lab and one was the mean-face lady and she's never seen it so crowded with people in wheelchairs". I admit, I was exasperated by this as it means she'll need to go back to the lab at some point. I told her I was disappointed as it's no big time suck for them to collect an additional vial and slap a label on it and that she had an appointment-- as opposed to being a walk-in-- and was entitled to get what she needed done completed however many people were there. I felt bad that I snapped, so I said <brightly> at least the dental appointment went well. Umm, it didn't. She didn't take her pills-- not when they went to breakfast together and not when they went back to her house to brush her teeth. When the dentist got wind of her non-compliance, he took a quick look, but her implant-anchored dentures couldn't be taken out and cleaned, so she needed to reschedule. The dentist is a friend of my DH's, so I feel extra awkward about this. DH overheard my end of the conversation and dead-panned as he so often does "And what did you yell at your mother for today?"
DH needs to renew his senior transit pass. We may take a ride over to our state representative's office to do that later. Mom needs hers renewed as well, so DH says I should bring her as well but I'm still feeling grumpy. I'll be taking her for her stress test tomorrow. It's the nuclear version, so I'll need to make sure she doesn't go rogue and blow that appointment as well. Instructions are no caffeine 24 hours prior and a light breakfast 4 hours before. She's supposed to bring a snack; I can cover that piece as I have to go to the store today anyway.
Off to finish the laundry. I swear people are sneaking in and leaving their dirty clothes.
HB
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Morning, Cloudy there this morning. No coffee here, juice for now and hot tea later. Fed GL and put her up until after Toad feeds. One of the bulls has bellowed,really screamed, ,off and on all night and is still doing it. Good luck with the test, Ron. I'll be back later.
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Lorita, are you keeping GL separate from the bulls? Why does a bull bellow? When the cattle were all yours, did you sell the bull calves and keep only the girls?
Harshed Buzz, so sorry about the mental load. I have often thought I could not do all that running around for my mother, and am glad I never had to. I did plenty as I was her only child in close proximity to her, but she went into a facility in 2015 and passed in 2017. I wish you well and I am sorry it gets so tough. Then, regarding mental load, my hubby fell off a ladder in September and broke his back, right humerus and left ankle. Spinal cord injury without paralysis. He was in the hospital for 6 wks then the skilled nursing for rehab for 7 wks. During this time, I had to do EVERYTHING. Plus driving to see him nearly every day. I had to arrange for lawn mowing, snow removal, gutter cleaning, window washing plus there were plumbing issues that I had to deal with. Of course, all the cleaning, gassing up the cars and you name it. It was very stressful. Stress multiplied by after he got home, having dr appointments 5 weeks in a row (5 different drs.) plus we had PT/OT in the house 4 days a week and I don't like having strangers in the house. Stress multiplied by fact that I didn't know how much function he would regain and I felt the retirement dreams I had might not happen. Thank God, things are better now but he is still definitely impaired in his ability to walk. He does walk with a cane. Balance is poor to fair. He goes to PT 3x/wk but can now get there himself. Anyway, life can be very hard at times!!! My best wishes to you.
Mint, I had never heard of crepuscular sun rays. They are beautiful. We have had some gorgeous sunrises and sunsets lately. Also, I have an app on my phone called Sky Guide. 2 things I like using it for: you can hold it up to the night sky and it identifies the stars, planets etc. Also, it notifies me when the International Space Station is flying over and I got out and see it. I've seen it many times. Love doing that.
Joan, hope you are feeling better and getting everything in place to move.
Jo, you are loved and missed. Write when you can, or get a message to anyone on here who you know how to contact and keep in touch.
Lawn is very thick and green, hundreds of daffodils blooming.
Good book alert: "I will always write back" by Caitlin Alifirenka and Martin Ganda.
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I don't mean to be insensitive to anyone who is single, widowed or divorced and living alone - you have to do everything, all of the time. Guess I was just talking about how I struggled with it along with my husband's disability.
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Harshedbuzz, I know exactly how the mental load is! Before Lou broke her hip I made the money and she did everything else. Of course I had it easier than a lot of caregivers, at least I was retired before I had to take charge of everything. I was also lucky Lou kept good receipes written down and a good ledger on bills coming and going. Of course I did have problems learning about laundry.
Test wasn't that bad, I did get a little dizzy, but the dr feels she found the problem. She told me that the crystals was off balance in my left ear and she could make adjustments to that. Also, she is sending my hearing aids off for new ones.
Ron
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Lorita I have seen a Sundog at least twice that I remember. I didn’t know what it was either and had to look it up and oddly enough I have seen it both times that I remember on that same highway. I’ve seen really neat clouds on the highway too. I was telling my sister about seeing the sunrise yesterday and I mentioned that I’ve seen other things on that highway.
like seeing frogs of all sizes too. I don’t get to see them a lot, but almost every summer I see those little itsy-bitsy ones at least, one time sitting in my flowers, they hide down in the flowers. A few years back at the house I live at now I saw a luna moth that’s the only time I’ve ever seen one. It was on the screen of my porch. And then last summer I saw a praying mantis here where I live, and it’s the first time I had ever seen a praying mantis here. I have seen them in the past. And I had so many bees here last year, when I first moved here, you never seen a bee I think they finally found me and my flowers. It may help, though that it is common now to see beehives here if you’re out of the city at all. Used to you never saw a beehive hardly around here. In Kentucky when we lived there, Almost every house Had at least one beehive with it. My dad always had bees when we lived out in the country, it’s nice. I enjoy seeing all those beehives. That’s a good thing.
Saw the bright beautiful moon this morning too. Try to remember to look for it every morning but sometimes I forget.
I might look into sky guide.
I feel your pain, HB and Beth.
Beth is the story a true story? I read very few books as you guys probably have caught onto, but this one looks like one that I might enjoy.
Beth, I can only speak for myself, but I don’t feel that you were insensitive at all. No matter what position we find ourselves in life we all have our struggles and stresses, advantages, and disadvantages.
Ron, glad your test went well.
My day went OK yesterday Lorita, thank you for asking. She was good while I was cleaning the house. I figured out that if she has laundry to fold and stuff that morning that it helps keep her occupied with other things. So my sister and I purposely save up towels to wash the day before I clean house . Then I go down in the morning and bring them up and that gives her something to do. She had seemed sincerely thankful the last two or three times I did it. This time she was back to telling me all my faults and that other people and told her her house was immaculate. I guess they didn’t look at her commode handle. Anyways, it was a little disappointing, I had hoped that we were past that.
Mom seems to be getting a little more agitated right now, but it seems like that’s something that happens almost every spring. She called me yesterday evening when I had already been there many hours during the day, telling me that she was going to get her affairs in order. I told her that she already has her affairs in order. I took it that she was wanting to change something about how she had dealt with the house. So I said back to her the only thing you have to deal with is the money you have, and that’s already been taken care of. Think I was right because she called me back again a bit later and said I know you own the house . So obviously, she knew why I said what I said toO. Then she told me she was going to call a man she knows who she thinks is intelligent, and ask his opinion. She had already told me earlier who she was going to call so I knew who the man was, and was not surprised. She stressed to me that he does not charge her anything. I don’t guess he would because he’s a retired construction worker. Anyways, when I left her house this morning, the phone was ringing and I heard her say his name so I guess he’ll be making a visit. I have talked to him in the past about not doing things without my permission construction wise as I own the house so I guess it’ll all work out OK. I did tell her I would not be running her to any lawyer. My sister said she’s not going to run her to any lawyer either. So so hopefully it’ll all just wash out. I think it will. That’s one way I’m doing better before I would’ve got all upset about it worried about it but I guess I’m past that now.
take care, everyone
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Good luck Ron with your test
Tomorrow I'm going to have a nuclear test on my brain to see if I have Parkinson on top of my Alzheimers
Please pray for me.
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Lorita....Sarah's problem with swollowing has caused me to remember Dick's Parkinson's. Seizzures, gastroparisis and swollowing problems are all a part of that disease. Parkinson's has mobil as well as non-mobil symptoms.
Non of his Drs pickedup on it. I happened on a webner fron the Universsity of Kansas and called Dr Ronald F Pfeiffer who gave the talk on the non motor synptoms and he led me to a wonderful Neurologist who had just come to OKC.
I hope Parkinson's was ruled out at some point.
Ron...I too have tne naughty crystals in my left ear. They can be very annoying to the point of almost blacking out.
https://health.clevelandclinic.org/bppv-why-loose-ear-crystals-make-you-dizzy-and-how-to-fix-them
I was doing really well until I konked my head recently.
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@BethL You've had a lot on your plate for sure. I don't think you came off as insensitive. It's not a race to the bottom. IME, living single did mean I was the one doing everything-- but it was always on my terms and I didn't have to consider the needs or feelings of others for the most part.
@ronald71111 I hope they can address the crystals as easily as it has been for friends of mine.
I think my husband would be OK without me-- he was single almost 10 years before we married. He could manage household accounts and investments, cook and do laundry. It would be the minutia of things like passwords, 2 step verifications, and all those details like who to call to clean the gutters or service the tractor that would trip him up. I'm working on a book for him.
I have a friend who was recently widowed in a 2nd marriage. She'd been a single mom for years so she knows a thing or two about mental load, but she was never caregiver to either of her parents and her husband died after a 2 month stay in the hospital with a spiraling illness. Her husband took wonderful care of her and of things household related, and she's struggling a bit with the loose ends now. I suspect a few people are taking advantage of her-- her auto policy is crazy expensive. I know her car is a couple years newer/more expensive than mine, she lives in the city so higher comprehensive and neither of them are great drivers but one driver on one car for a month shouldn't cost what I pay for one car three drivers for 6 months. She just got a landscaping estimate for plants and a path to the tune of $40K.
@Mint I'm sorry your mom seems stuck in this agitate loop. I do hope she moves on from it soon for everyone's sake. I recall those days with dad-- those were some really ugly times. So hurtful for my mom who took it all to heart.
@Lorita why would the bull be bellowing all night? Did you check on him?
DH and mom got their transit passes renewed; they should get new cards in 2-6 weeks. I was able to review prep for mom's tests tomorrow with her and double check about the "snack" she's supposed to bring with. I'll fix her a sandwich and picked her up a ready-made caramel cold latte.
DS is on his way home. He said seeing the battleship in the river channel was pretty cool. DH watched it on YouTube but I'm sure that's not the same. DS sounds pumped; I guess we'll be hearing all about it at dinner.
HB
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Hi Judith, my cousin had Parkinson's and his voice grew steadily worse. Sarah says she has one or two nodules on her neck that are pressi?my on her vocal cords. I doubt Parkinson's has been checked. You know I worked with an EENT specialist many years ago for two or three years and I had never heard of crystals in the ear. May be something discovered since then which was 60 years ago. So you hut your head? Is it okay? I hut my head two or three tines years after I lost Charles and again a year or so ago. I even got a helmet to wear.
David, prayers going up that you don't have Parkinsons. Please let us know.. I need to check to see if the little frog I. Mint, I've seen miracles two or three times coming home from work, going west just before sundown. Really weird. This was on a country road.
I remember leaving the hospital walking out with one of our doctors. I saw a sun dog and showed him but he didn't know what it was. Guess they don't happen often. What about the roll or shelf cloud. Those are sort of scary stretching all across the sky with a big roll in front. Been a partly cloudy day. Had a shower about 11 and I hear sprinkles now.
Beth, do hope your husband continues to improve quickly. What an awful accident. We always sold spring bull calves the following January and always had good luck doing that. Most ranchers work their cattle so either cut or band their bull calves so can keep them.longer if need be. Mike has said for three or four months that he's going to move them but can't find time. I wish he would be cause when a cow comes in three or more bull calves can run a cow to ground. Sometimes they get exhausted and have to lay down to keep them away. That's what happened to Gray Lady when she calved and the day I let her out with them. They bellow when there might be a cow in estrus in another pasture or if a strange bull might be near or if something is wring. He's quit bellowing after they were fed.
Mint, glad yesterday was okay. Good idea to have something to keep your mom occupied. How is your gardening going? Probably still too cold up there.
HB, you sound almost overwhelmed with all you do for your mother plus everything else. I didn't have so many trios caring for my parents bit Charles but I always tried to arrange at least a couple of things for each trip. I still do that just for me. Doesn't matter if you live alone or not, still lots to take care of. Some days are worse than others. Don't know how you handle it in all the traffic you must have. I get aggravated if I meet one vehicle on the country road and probably don't meet more than a dozen on the highway to town. Country lady for sure.
Mint, several years ago honey bees had a hive in an old tree trunk in our yard. We had a neighbor who had bee hives and he came and got them. He was sting a couple of times and his eye was swollen shut before we could get Benadryl to him. Our feed store always has raw honey for sale. Charles and I tried raising bees many years ago but sold them after a few months.. I think we did get some honey though.I think we raised almost everything and tried most things. Goid memories.
I better stop and finish the taxes so I can get them mailed.
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Lorita, I'm going tomorrow morning to have a nuclear test on my brain to determine if I have Parkinson and I will let you know the results when I know. Right now am praying that it's NOT
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Dear front porch friends,
I need your prayers for my dear son-in-law.
He is early 50's and had a stroke. No details on how bad. When I saw him a few hours before hospital he was able to talk but was walking like a drunken sailor. He is such a good man to all of us.
Thanks much. Marie
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I will pray for him.
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🙏 praying for David and loveskitties son in law.
Ron
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Thanks HB. I googled a bit and found the info re the Battleship and the move vedry interesting.
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Prayers the test is negative, Dapvid. Marie, your SIL will be in my prayers. I hope it's a very light stroke with no residuals. How old is he? I pray for all of you each night.
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Marie, sorry to hear about your DSIL, praying for the best outcome. Ron, good luck tomorrow - will be thinking of you.
Lorita, how's your ankle? All healed? I love the way you look after GL and all your girls ❤️
Life is so precious and we never know how long we have. Two days ago a 51 year old math teacher at one of the parochial schools in my area, attending by many teens in my neighborhood, committed suicide. Everyone that knew him is shocked! He was an advocate for many of his students and loved by all. We never know the demons that some of us are dealing with. Heartbreaking. Today, my granddaughter found out that her ex-boyfriend's mom died in her sleep overnight! She was in her mid 40's. Just a reminderthat tomorrow is not guaranteed.
I lost my daddy in an accident when I was 13; 50 years ago. I think of him and talk with him everyday! Pain never leaves, life goes on and he lives forever in my heart. My mom never remarried - she is my best friend.
I'm grateful for everyday I'm here and for all that God has blessed me with. I hope this does not come across as a negative post, just as a reminder of our mortality and how lucky we all are even with our individual struggles. xo
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Commonly Used Abbreviations
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POA = Power of Attorney
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