Mom has AD and husband abandoned her.

Yes, my SF has 3 sons. His youngest son lives close by and is caring for him while he's in AL. My brother and I believe my SF's oldest son is influencing my SF to get my mom out of the picture so when he passes the money goes to him. My brother and I were in communication with my SF's youngest son and wife up until July when they cut us off. At that same time, my SF oldest son came into town and took my SF to their financial advisor and then told my mother he removed her as beneficiary. He also told the AL that he didn't want my mom to move in with him around the same time and that he was filing for divorce. I reported elder abuse with the agency of aging at the end of July. I tried to report financial abuse with the agency of aging last month against my SF but was told they cannot file a report as he doesn't seem competent.

My brother and I are POA and we have filed for guardianship of our mother. I'm at a loss..

Yes, my SF hallucinates and has for a couple years now. That said, I have read that can be due to his medication. I have no way of knowing if he is demented at this point, unfortunately, as his family will no longer speak to me and my brother. My mom was my SF POA. I searched a few county's court of register's site and can't find anything online stating that he changed it. SF son's help him these days and we believe they are trying to get my mom out of the picture so they get the inheritance. I did report elder abuse to the financial advisor back in July.

@victoriaredux - Thank you for your advise, you must work in legal:) Interestingly the last attorney we met with handles divorce and guardianship, only said we should file for guardianship and said we could file ourselves. The attorney didn't mention that it was important to retain her.

At this point I don't believe my SF is filing for divorce. My guess is he doesn't want to pay thousands of dollars for an attorney or isn't competent (has delusion and hallucinates). It's been over 2 months since he started threatening divorce and still nothing. We met with an elder law attorney a couple months ago and advised us to update mom's will, trust, etc and gave us names of lawyers that handle family law.

There was no prenup, luckily. Unfortunately, my SF ended up in the ICU last week with a lung infection and I'm not sure how much longer he will live. I have the guardianship hearing this Thursday and will bring my concerns to the judge. I will also be letting the judge know the cost of assisted living so he can get my mom access to money, hopefully.

I was awarded guardianship on the 14th. The just ordered that all joint money be split 50/50 and put into the guardianship account. My attorney ad litem also let me know that if my SF removed mom from his trust that as his spouse she would be entitled to at least a 1/3 of his estate plus $7,500 when he passes. That along with his SS would be enough hopefully for her to move into AL.