Just need to talk to my friends (184)

Lorita

Hi,

Thought I'd do this before 183 went too long - it's been 21 days which is longer than usual - and we've been a talkative bunch of people - love that!

I've looked and looked and couldn't find what you all were talking about with Jo's nephew.  What happened?

Marie - I think we were posting about the same time when you posted about the oven fire.  How scary that must have been - thank goodness for soda and that nothing was harmed too much and the oven still worked and the turkey was fine.   Many years ago Charles and I were down at the farm house with mother and daddy and I decided to make an apple pie baked in a sack. Got the recipe from a dear friend who passed away many years ago - she was the best cook.  I made the pie often - really a deep dish apple pie but it was baked in a sack to promote even browning and no drips.  It bakes for an hour and ten minutes, then you're supposed to let the oven cool just a little while before you open it.  Guess I didn't wait long enough so when I opened the door the sack burst into flames.  Mother doused it with soda and put out the fire.  We brushed off the soda and ate the pie with ice cream - no problem.  This pie is better the first day - just isn't quite the same the next day - but, that's no problem if you like apple pie.

I got the trash all together and in the back of the pickup to take down in the morning.  I'll have one more sack to add to the load.  The trash guys probably will want to pass it by but they won't.  I didn't take it down last week.

Then, Stormy and I drove up in the Gator to see the girls.  Haven't been driving it because it was low on gas - I got some today and now we can drive it occasionally.  The girls were out of hay so called Mike and told him.  He said Toad feeds in the morning and they'll get hay and feed.  I just can't stand for anything to be hungry - they were trying to find something out in a bare pasture - there was still a little bit in the bottom of two rings - so said okay, just wanted to let you know.  I turned on the water to fill the tank and came inside.  About the time I needed to turn it off I heard the girls bawling so knew something was going on.  Looked out and he was bringing a bale of hay to them.  The girls thought he was going to feed and as he left you should have seen them running toward the feed troughs.  Cows can run fast when they want to.  

I didn't want to step on toes but still didn't want them to be hungry and I know he doesn't either.  He doesn't feed hay very often so doesn't know when they're out.  I've always called and told him when they were getting low so it's okay.   He's so busy with the clinic and making farm calls and doing other things with his cattle he appreciates a call. 

Zetta, I don't know if he'd want me to do that or not.  I've thought about it and would be happy to do so.  If I fed the two thin ones a couple of times, they'd come back up every day.  In fact, the other day I gave Susie's mom some extra hay and the next day she was there for more.  They're creatures of habit just like us.

Now I'm looking for a cattle tank water deicer.  Somewhere we have one and I imagine it's in the storage building.  Tomorrow I'll go out and see if I can find it.  We've used it before and it works great.  It's electric and the deicer floats in the water tank and warms the water just enough to keep it from freezing. Girls really don't like drinking really cold water - in the winter, that is.  For the life of me I don't know why it doesn't shock the cattle but it doesn't.  It just floats in the water and keeps it from freezing.  Hope I can find it - those things have really gone up in price - just like everything else.

It is so quiet - can't get over it.  I think everyone except me is already asleep and it's just after 6.  I hope the weather is okay so the technician can come and get the TV reception back on.  I looked at the dish and everything looks okay to me - but that's just me.  I really don't want an upgrade - I like it just like it's been except I'd like to get the local channels on the TV in the bedroom.

Haven't heard any more from Todd.  I hope he was able to see the doctor - but if not tonight and he stays there all night, he probably can see him when he makes rounds in the morning.  He was sweet telling me what he'd gotten together to take to Sarah - brush and comb, toothpaste, tweezers, etc.  They're a sweet couple but have had so many health problems these past years.  I'm worried to say the least.

I've written far too much today.  Don't want you all to get too bored with me so I'll stop for now.  I dread this coming week's weather.  Zetta, hope you find that soup - if not, remember Amazon has it.

Sleep well tonight - hope no one gets much snow.  See you tomorrow.

Mint

My approximately 90yo Aunt and 88yo uncle have Covid.  Unfortunately they’re not on Paxlovid.  They are on Molnupiravir  instead which has a 30% effectiveness compared to 89% for Paxlovid.  There may be more to that part of the story, not sure though since getting story second handed.  Anyways we will wait and see.  My approximately 91yo Aunt did ok so you never know.

loveskitties

Sayra, so sorry to hear about your LOs having Covid.  My prayers that they recover quickly with no lasting effects.

By the way, for everyone, you can go on to the USPS postal website  (  https://store.usps.com/store/results?Ntt=covid&_requestid=377312 ) and order 4 free home covid tests...this is above and beyond the free ones you can get with your insurance/Medicare (8 free each month available where your insurance is accepted for prescriptions).  Given how things are going, it might not hurt to have them on hand.

Lorita

Morning,

Sara, so sorry to hear about your aunt and uncle.  I wish them a speedy recovery.  We just never know where we might be exposed.

They mentionod something about expiration dates on those tests.  I have some but can't find the expiration date - I'll keep looking - but, I did order some more.

It's not bad out this morning.  Just got back from taking down the trash - had to go twice because I forgot our mailcarrier's Christmas gift.  I usually give her Muk Luks.  I love them and hope she does.  The girls heard the PU and started coming down for their feed - of course, a few are still up at the hay.

Today's the day the TV repairman comes.  Hate to have someone in the house but if he doesn't have a mask on, I'll give him one - then spray afterwards.  I'll be glad to have it back but, you know, last night we listened to the most beautiful Chinese Zen music and it was so restful.  Maybe I'll start doing that once a week.  

Gotta straighten up a little bit.  Did get the dishes done and put away last night so that's something I don't have to do - and the trash (two week's worth) is out of the house.  Just fed the cats - now to tackle giving them their medicine.  I'll have my juice first and let their food settle.

Lorita

Got all the medicine down the cats but lost a little bit of Max's.  Gave medicine to the GPs - now for the eyedrops for Kitt.

Todd just called and the news is not good.  He spent the night at the hospital with Sarah and got to talk with the doctor this morning.  He said there's a kink somewhere in Sarah's intestines and it's causing the fecal matter to back up all through her system.  They're trying to suction it all out but if it starts to back up gain in 24 hours they'll have to do surgery again.  He says there's a 70% chance she won't survive the surgery.  He said she's in a lot of pain and nothing they give her really helps.  She did sleep a little last night.

Again, I'm asking for prayers and good wishes from all of you.  I know prayers help and she needs all the help she can get now.  God is with her and he knows what is best for her.   Todd is heartbroken, scared and alone.  He said he was going home for a little while and talk with his mother.

Sarah is a strong lady - I still think of her as a little girl - and if anyone can survive this, she will, but she needs all the help she can get.

Lorita

I called and talked a while with Sarah.  She's in so much pain and nothing helps. She says she just can't go on like this.  Tried to encourage her but doubt it succeeded.  She said when the doctor was talking with Todd both of them were crying.  She's fought this awful disease for five or more years with several major surgeries, each time thinking this would take care of it.  Maybe, just  maybe, if she'd had a really good doctor who knew about this disease, things could have been different.  We'll never know.  She's been through so much I think she's just about given up.  I told her as long as there's a one percent chance, that can be enough.  Trying to encourage her but ....

Thanks to all of you for letting me have someone to talk to about this.  There's no one else.

Mint

Life is surely tough sometimes.  Sure Sarah is glad she has you.

ronald71111

Prayers for Sarah!!!

jfkoc

I feel so bad for Sarah. Gastroperisis is a nasty thing. We are all pulling for her. If I can help let me know. Is she at Mercy?

ladyzetta

Good Morning Rockers.

Lorita.  I am so sorry to hear about Sarah, she and Todd are both in my prayers. You as well. It seems like with all the medicines there should be something they can give her to help with the pain. I hope they let Todd stay with her for as long as she needs him too. 

It would be nice if you find your deicer you need all the help you can get you always have so much to do. I would not like it if my TV went out. Hopefully you get yours fixed today. I have a TV in my bedroom and front room. 

Sara.   Your Aunt and Uncle are also in my prayers. Hopefully they are both strong enough to recover from covid. Please take care and try not to worry, they are in God's hands. 

I have an electric twin size blanker I put on top of my sheets. I am afraid to cover with one because my cats sleep on the bed and Iam afraid what would happen if one of them clawed through the wires. I guess if I had a throw over the blanket that would be the way to go. 

Not much snow lately but it has been very cold. What snow we have is no melting. Iam just staying inside keeping warm. 

Hugs Zetta 

ronald71111

Sayra, I'm sorry to hear about your aunt and uncle, both are in my prayers for a quick and complete recovery.

I called my sister and told her Lou and I wouldn't be able to make it for Christmas.  I appreciate the nudge from the front porch, I knew I shouldn't try and make the trip but had a hard time believing it would hurt me.

I found out today that Lou has a boyfriend! I asked her this morning how she liked church yesterday, her response was......you know I have a boyfriend at church. She told me they were holding hands during the service, when I told her that was me she was holding hands with. She said.......no, it was my boyfriend. Oh well, maybe he can help me!!LOL 

Cold and drizzly!

Ron

Mint

Ron I hope her boyfriend will help you too, that’s cute.

Thanks for your prayers everyone.  Zetta I won’t worry.  What will be, will be. Turns out, IMO, some very poor decisions being made.  They are actually worse than what I had received from a second hand source.  Today got info from one of the horse’s mouths.  Just said hope you get to feeling better.  

BethL

Lorita, I'm praying for Sarah and Todd. I know she is like a daughter to you. 

Sara, I am praying for your aunt and uncle. 

Regarding being warm in bed, how about a heated mattress pad? Right now we have a waterbed - yes, STILL! Had it for over 30 years! In the spring we are going to get a regular bed, as we are starting to have back pain and the waterbed is not supportive. It sure is nice and warm in the winter time, though. When we get our new bed, we will have a heated mattress pad for winter use. You can turn it on prior to going to bed to heat up the bed, and turn it off when you get in bed. Or you can leave it on all night....your choice. 

Today I made Sara's tuna noodle casserole. So good! I doubled the recipe and have frozen enough leftovers for 3 more meals for the 2 of us. I also made Holly Wreaths (with cornflakes, marshmallows, green food color and red hots), peanut clusters (12 oz choc chips, 12 oz butterscotch chips, 12 oz salted peanuts, and toffee. I made some plates to take goodies to a couple of neighbors.

Ron, I enjoyed your story about Lou's boyfriend! lol

Beth

Iris L.

Sayra, I also wish your aunt and uncle a speedy recovery from Covid with no complications.

Lorita, I am so sorry about Sarah.  I'm hoping bowel rest will help her.

I have a hard time getting Simon's meds into him, I crush and hide them into his food.  He is learning not to like his canned kidney diet, he still likes regular cat food.

Iris

JudeV

Merry Christmas to everyone.  Getting very cold here. By this weekend, which will be Christmas, we are having a winter storm watch.   Luckily, I don’t have to drive far to my son’s for  Christmas dinner.  It has been some time since we had a white Christmas.  

Ron, I think you are smart to stay home and not drive to your sisters.   Not only about your legs but Lou could have a bad day and you don’t need more stress.   Do you have “Face Time”  on your phone?    That is a godsend for families far from home   My second son lives in Maryland and we talk and see each other on the phone about 2 times a week.   I think you need an IPhone but the app is free  Oh…… Just read an article that said if you have leg cramps, which I do sometimes, to drink pickle juice. 

Made banana nut bread, cookies,  peanut brittle, fudge and rock candy.   Also made Peppermint Pattie’s.  Taste just like York’s.  

Dec. 30th I will be  79.   I have a hard time being old.   Still pretty active.  I belong to the YMCA.  Can’t swim but exercise in the pool.  Bowl 2 times a week.  Take care of my chickens and have a good veggie garden in the summer.  Plus all my flower gardens.  I have aches and pains but that is part of the process.  

Watching football now.  Can’t get back into Yellowstone.  Language is bad every other word.  I don’t like that.  I am not a prude but hate foul language.

Take care and stay safe.    Judy

ronald71111

Good morning everyone, a little chilly this morning so thought I would come CV to Lorita's front porch where the weather is always perfect. Its suppose to have a wind chill below 0 by friday and even though several of you are use to that, here where I am it's not the norm. 

Lou was talking about her boyfriend again this morning. She once again informed me she has a boyfriend at church and said.....he is really something. I informed her she was married to me and she needed to let him know she's a married woman. She told me........noooo, I'm going with him. As I was helping her back in bed she seemed to come back to reality and let me know she loved me and didn't know what to do without me.  I asked her about her church boyfriend and was told I'm the only boyfriend she has.

Keep those rockers rocking and stay warm.

Ron

Lorita

Morning,

Not too bad on the porch this morning - it's sunny but chilly and windy.  I so wish we could miss this cold weather that's coming.  It says it may get 15-30 degrees below zero wind chill with single digit temps.   I know the girls will be in the barn.

Thank you all for the prayers for Sarah.  I talked with her this morning and she said they're going to keep her in the hospital to try to find something to alleviate her pain, then when they accomplish that will send her home to pass away.  i hate to hear her say something like that. Todd's staying with her as much as he can - he was there the last two or three nights.  He wants to come and get me and take me  up to see her, then bring me back home.  I'm not feeling well - having trouble with my right eye or sinus, not sure.  My doctor told me I have extra large sinuses and I've always had trouble with them.  I just don't feel like making the trip plus being around people.  I know he's not well and being in a truck with him for four anything to if they operated.

Just went out to fill the water tank.  Billy was standing there waiting.  They know what I'm doing when I go out and if the water is low or gone, they come to the tank.

Ron, I think that's cute that Lou has a boyfriend - we know it's you - so no harm done.  I think that happens quite often in nursing homes and when they're around other people.  So, no harm done as long as it's you.

With the weather like it is right now it doesn't seem possible that it's going to be so bad but the weather in Oklahoma can turn on a dime.  We havc a slope north from the house and barn and the north wind come up that slope with a vengence.  If the girls are in the garden the house and the storage building shelter them somewhat.  I guess the heifers and the two little bulls can find shelter on the south side of the pond - there's lots of trees all around it. 

I slept in this morning - until after 8 a.m., unheard of.  Still have my robe and gown on and no plans to change right away. 

I just feel bad about not going to see Sarah but I hope she'll understand.  They both have been sick for over a year with colds and covid so don't feel it would be safe to be around them and inside a hospital.  Am i wrong? 

Alarm is going off so need to go turn off the water.  Back later.

Lorita

The water tank wasn't full but I turned off the water anyway.  

Iris, I know the trouble you're having giving medicine to Simon - multiple that by three and you have me.  I have two cats that get Amoxicillin and a pill each and one that gets  pill  so I'm dealing with giving five medications.  I can't put the liquid over their food.  I've done that so much they know what I'm doing.  So, have to try to hold them down and squirt it in their mouths.  I have to dissolve two tablets in a bit of warm water, then repeat the above - holding them down and trying to get it down them.  One bigger pill for Max has to be crushed, then dissolved and squirted into his mouth.  Both the Pyrenees are getting a Prednisone each day for about another week.  They're easy - just wrap the pill in cheese and they take it.  Just remembered I didn't give them their glucosamine and vitamin.  I decided this morning I'm not going to give Max his medicine anymore - he drools it all over the floor so doesn't get much of it anyway - it's to help his digestive system.   He'll eat, then usually vomits.

By the time all of the above is done, I'm ready for a tranquilizer (haven't taken any - but might).

Really good to have TV reception back again.  Don't know if I told you all but something had nibbled on the cable at the end of the porch.  Couldn't have been a mouse or rat because it was up too high so I bet it was a squirrel or raccoon.  A morning or two ago I went out to fill the water tank and a big cottontail jumped up and ran, got under the fence and off he went.  Stormy saw him and really got excited.  That's the first cottontail I've seen in a long time - since I saw another one in the yard.  I seldom see rabbits anymore - too many coyotes, I guess.  By the way, how do you all pronounce coyotes?  Cy-o-tee or Cy-oat?  Around here it's the latter.   I hear them every night and see them often.  Sorry, didn't mean to go on.

ronald71111

Lorita,  you mentioning how people talked in nursing homes reminded me of this sweet little old lady when Lou's mom was in a nursing home. She was always walking up and down the hallway and would stop and asked how we were. One morning when she asked and we asked her how she was, she would say "that sob done got me pregnant again ". We found out from one of the aids that every once and awhile she would go off on her husband and she had 6 or 7 children.

Ron

ladyzetta

Lorita.    Don't feel bad you do not need to be going into a place like a hospital unless you're in need of one. Hopefully Sarah understands. Can you do a video zoom or whatever they are called. If you need to go anyplace maybe her house after she gets home. You love her and she knows that, please don't feel bad. Hugs Zetta

Mint

https://youtu.be/xM0vT2m1DSA

 Beth here is a link to something that has helped my back.  Can check it out if you want and see what you think, very simple.

Glad you enjoyed tuna noodle Beth.  I used ideas from two recipes and I really liked it too.

Jude nice to hear from you.  Sounds like you made a lot of goodies.  I’m with you on the foul language issue, hate hearing it and turn off anything that contains it.

Lorita I would have a hard time too being in a truck with Todd four hours.  This is a hard decision for you I know.

We got sunshine today, so nice.

Good night everyone

ladyzetta

Ron.    That is so cute that Lou was telling you about her boyfriend at church, we all know who that boyfriend is. When you take her to church just remind her of her boyfriend who is waiting for her. 

Jude.  I bet your house smelt so good after you did all that baking. I will be baking cookies and making brownies in a few days, I am not a start from scratch baker like my DH was, all my mixes come from a box. 

Lorita.   Iam sorry that the doctor can't do much for Sarah, hopefully at least they can give her something for pain. Please don't feel bad about not going, it is not a safe thing for you to do. especially with a 4 hour drive each way. it's nice that you are able to talk to her on the phone. You Todd and her are in my prayers.

Stay Warm, Hugs Zetta 

BethL

Sara, thanks for the link to the youtube video. I've put it on my watch list to look at tomorrow.

Zetta, enjoy your baking. So many goodies this tine of year!

Lorita, you're in my thoughts and prayers as are Sarah and Todd. Very sad circumstances.

littleme

Happy Christmas to all my cobbers.

Sorry I haven't written much lately, but I am up to date with everyone's news. Praying for Sarah and Todd, and for Sara's family, and for all of the whole gang. Wish I could be with you.

Summer is in full swing here. Christmas Day will be in the mid 90s, then over the century for the few days after that. My daughter and family who live interstate are here for the season. I had planned to have a cold turkey, ham and salad meal, so the freezer was stocked. But daughter has decided she will cook a hot dinner in my kitchen, so my freezer will stay stocked. Thank goodness I have air-conditioning, using the oven heats up the whole house.

Second daughter who is single, sings in a very good church choir here. On Boxing Day the choir is flying to England where they will be singing in Cathedrals across the country, while the local choirs have a break. They have done this before, and had a wonderful time, and I'm sure will again. My interstate family are also leaving on Boxing Day, so I will have a crowded Christmas Day in my little home, then everything will be back to normal ...quiet.. the next day.

I hope you all have healthy and happy days ahead.

Barbara in Australia

Mint

Good morning,

Nice to hear from you Barbara. Try to enjoy the heat a.

 We are headed to the deep freezer here in OhioThursday eve to Saturday eve.  Not a whole lot of snow predicted 2-4 inches so far.  So thankful that I have someone to plow mom’s.

Going to try and get to store at 0600.  Know the storm threat will empty shelves.  Hopefully I will beat the rush.

May talk with you again later

Lorita

Hi,

I'll try this again.  Got the post almost finished and had to leave to take care of something outside - touched something when I came in and it disappeared.

Barbara, good to see your post and know you're all right.  Hope you have a good Christmas and Boxer's Day. Enjoy it and the heat - wish we had even 50 degrees of it.  It's cold here right now but in the 40s - nothing like it will be the next two days.  The worst will be the wind chill - winds are supposed to be 40-50 mph from the north.  The weatherman just said there was somewhere in Montana that the temperature dropped 25 degrees in 3-5 minutes when the front came through.

 So glad the girls have the barn to get into and can stand on the south side of the house out of the wind.  I'll still have to get out and fill the water tanks but I can do that if I don't have to cut too much ice.  I remember in previous ice storms having to hold up ice-laden limbs to get through to fill the water tanks.

Toad came and fed this morning.  I just drove up to check - there's three bales of hay and several of the heifers are in with the cows.  I don't know if he let them in or what.  Some are still in the other pasture.  So glad the barn has new doors and shutters so they can get out of the wind - even standing in front of it - which some will do.

Sara - hope you got your grocery shopping done ahead of the crowds.  I've heard the stores are packed with last minute shoppers.  

Zetta, I would love to see Sarah but the trip is long for Todd to make both ways and he needs to be with her as long as he can be. I will talk with her as much as I can. 

I called her this morning and she was crying so hard I could hardly understand her.  Someone came in while we were talking and she talked to them.  The woman asked her if she wanted to see a Chaplain.  After that I told her to talk with the Chaplain - it would help.  The doctor came this morning and told she and Todd they've done all they can - even given all the medications for pain they can without completely sedating her.  From what I gather from them they're actually thinking about sending her home.  Can they do that?   I've often said I don't understand the private sector very much but I know the VA would not do that, at least when I was working there.

I talked with Todd as he was going home.  Told him to talk with the Patient Advocate - I'm sure they must have one - and if that didn't help talk with the hospital administrator.  It would be too much for him to deal with.  He was crying when we talked.  She asked him to go home and find phone numbers for her sons.  Not sure where they are but I think one is somewhere north of OKC and the other one is in OKC off and on.

To get her out of pain - if there's no hope and it seems there isn't - maybe it would be better to make her as comfortable as possible.  It's Todd's and Sarah's decision.  I really don't know what I would do if I was in their place.

Can they really send someone home when they're this bad?  

I'm going to stop and call Sarah.  Tell me if there's something that can be done to keep her in the hospital instead of being sent home.

Lorita

Okay, so talked with Sarah.  She and Todd have talked about it and she wants to go home.  She said she wanted to see her pets and the house again and end her life on earth there.  It was her grandmother's home.  She is the one to make this decision.  I imagine they'll have hospice with her but I know they can't stay all the time.  She told me her wishes - no cremation (we had talked about that many times).  Someone came in the room while we were talking - maybe the Chaplain.  So, it's her wish and it will be honored.

Maybe this is part of why I've been so upset and sad this month. So much has happened around Christmas time, before and after.  I knew the time would come but you're never ready - as we all know.  She'll be with all of her grandparents and mother and the rest of the family - so many more in Heaven than on earth.  She's been in pain for so long with little relief and the quality of life has not been there for her.    That doesn't make it easier though.

Jo C.

Dear Lorita, I am truly deeply sorry for what is happening with Sarah. 

I think your decision regarding making a four hour truck ride trek to a distant hospital for a short visit is that you have made the right and best decision.  It would be a taxing effort for you on bad roads, you would also be in a setting where there would be a high degree of risk considering your age and several health issues leaving you more prone to contracting one or even more of the various severe viruses now in the communities which have been leading to significant illness.  All of that for a very short visit and having to make another reverse trek back to home and all of the animals alone at the house; not a positive.  Todd is also in public contact within the community and should he have been exposed to one of the present viruses, you would be locked in a truck cab with him for hours; even with a mask that still would put you at risk in such close proximity for such a long length of time.   So hope you do not feel guilty about your decision and I am willing to bet that Todd and Sarah understand.

Another option would be for you to visit each other using Zoom or other application where you can actually see one another while you visit with the laptop or other computer.  Hospital staff may even be able to help with that.

The idea of discharging Sarah seems a bit precipitous under the circumstances as described IF you are receiving accurate information.  If she is to be discharged now, having that be to her home alone without care or caregiver could well be a very high risk for her.  If she needs discharge and would be mostly alone, she would be best served to be in skilled care for awhile so she could receive care.

NOTE:  I am going to say something here which may have an impact (or not), in how the  hospital staff may partially be trying to manage such a complex "case," and my words are not meant as an insult whatsoever, it is just something that would be something to think about if it may possibly be part of how some impact may be even a small part in making decisions re care.

Sarah, in the past, has been not only a non-compliant patient over time re all or most services; she has frequently not kept appointments, turned away Home Health RNs from her home, and the most highly significant issue is that she has abused medications including pain meds as per what has been shared in Posts in the past and the medical staff is very aware of it, tried to deal with it, and in all probability it is all well documented in her records.   Also in the past, at some times, she has not been accurate in what she has told you.  Not always, just sometimes.

Sarah was also advised and authorized to receive psychiatric therapy with a psychiatrist, but she did not keep her appointments and then refused psychiatric treatment altogether.

So . . . IF part of the plan to discharge early is somewhat even a bit affected by past experience, that may be something perhaps to be addressed.  It is the current here and now patient condition that needs to be driving the treatment plan and also when it is appropriate for her to be discharged as well as the best and safest setting for her to discharge to. My guess is, that the staff may well be doing just that, but you do not have first hand information which would lend much light.  AND even if she returns home, then it should also include medically necessary Home Health following and also, perhaps, if thought to be time by her physician(s), to have her assessed to determine whether she is a Palliative Care or Hospice candidate with her condition as it now is.  It appears that it is at a point that she should not be home alone.

Have to ask, did the physician or other staff say she was actually going to be discharged at this time?   AND did they really say, "to die," OR was she offered Palliative Care or Hospice  as an option?  If she was offered Palliative Care or Hospice, that may be what has so deeply upset her.  However, it is unknown what was actually presented to her. 

NOTE:  Will Sarah give HIPAA Waiver permission for you to speak with the physician and the RNs and Case Managers who have seen her as she has permitted in the past?  If she would do that, you would have accurate information and be able to clarify matters with her and Todd or to give helpful input with the professionals.  Also, since she is in such a dreadful state and cannot travel to offices for appointments, would she be accepting of a Psychiatric Consult being called in at this time while she is still an inpatient to assess and perhaps to lend some direction to all that is happening?   If so, perhaps this may help extend her stay for a few days.

Just some ideas that come to mind after reading your Posts and knowing how deeply this is concerning you.  I am deeply sorry that this is happening and so hope that a gentler and kinder way will be found for Sarah that she is willing to accept and continue with services that will bring her much needed solace, peace and comfort.

Really wish she would permit you to speak with her providers so you can have things clear as they really are and perhaps lend some verbal support for what is needed.

If she refuses care at the Skilled level or refuses ongoing Home Health if she goes home, there is nothing anyone can do as she is not under any sort of guardianship or psychiatric hold.  It must be what she is willing to move forward with.  I feel terrible we cannot be of more help to you Lorita; you are such a caring and loving presence in Sarah's life and that is a very big thing and also I am sure, comforting to her.   You are by nature, a caring and giving person; I can imagine how difficult this must be for you.

Heartfelt feelings of care go out to you, 

J.   

jfkoc

Lorita...love and hugs sent.

loveskitties

Dear Lorita, I am so very sorry to hear this latest update on Sarah.

It has been my experience, especially with Medicare, that if a hospital deems no additional treatment can improve the patient, then they are either sent home or to a care facility.  The idea behind this is that hospital beds are needed for those who can possibly improve, and with beds in high demand because of pandemic, etc. they are going by that.

I know with my dad, we had just a couple of days to find a MC facility for him before Medicare was going to stop paying.  He was hospitalized for a heart condition, and the whole experience there cause steep decline in abilities.

May God grant Sarah and Todd the easiest days possible.

As the bad winter weather marches east, I hope that all stay safe and warm, along with all their fur babies.

Mint

Lorita I too am so sorry.  Please come here and talk as often as you need too.