How to communicate with a parent in denial

stvogelsang

Hello! Rather abruptly it has become clear my mom will need to be in MC for at least the immediate short term, or even longer. She had an episode of delirium after attempting to travel solo to a family member, and while she has largely recovered, her baseline is way worse than before this episode. She was released from the hospital onto a skilled nursing floor for oversight for a few days until she was cleared to go back to her apartment. Unfortunately the caregivers are not comfortable releasing her back to her independant living apartment, even with nurse check-ins throughout the day and a companion every afternoon.

The problem is that my mom is "with it" enough to argue that she is fine, and is agitated and very confused and upset at being prohibited from going back to her unit. She is desperate to get back to her own space (and I can't blame her!).

How do I tactfully communicate that she is worse than she realizes? Is that possible? How do I express empathy, but hold the line that she is not safe on her own and needs to be cared for?

Quilting brings calm

I’d try telling her that the doctor won’t release her YET. And that her insurance will only be valid if she follows the doctors’s orders. Also that delirium can be recovered from quicker if she follows orders. truthfully it can take several weeks to recover as much of the baseline as possible.

Don’t even imply that her stay will be permanent or that her condition won’t improve. Just say that she hasn’t met the doctors goals Yet but that reaching them is still possible.

Iris L.

Your mom is not "with it". Please read about anosognosia, the PWD truly believes she is fine, and will become upset if you confront her with reality. So do not try to convince her, but learn the work-arounds that the members use. There are links for anosognosia but I do not have them.

Iris

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