Feel Lost, Need Advice with Mom's Dementia/Alzheimers, Living and Depression

mlenny

Mom was diagnosed 3 years ago with dementia. We believe she is about 5 - 6 years into it though. She also has severe depression, diagnosed 30 years ago. She is in an AL, but absolutely hates the place. This is her 4th home in 3 years, and the smallest so far (IL, AL, MC, AL). She is again in a severe depression, they seem to be coming more often than we are used too. Anyway, we just need someone to tell us what to do. Should she be in AL or MC? Should we find another facility? She's on depression meds and does see a psychiatrist, and no we don't do therapy anymore cause she doesn't remember what happens from day to day, generally.

SusanB-dil

Hi mlenny - Whether she should be in AL or MC depends on which stage she is in. Is she able to do much of the ADL's (Activities of Daily Living - hygiene, eating, etc) Often what is said is that if you are questioning whether she should, then it may be time for MC.

Make sure her doctor knows about the current depression.

Also make sure DPOA and HIPAA accesses are in place.

Check out the staging information as to what level your mom may be at. That is very helpful. There is also the free 24/7 Helpline available at 1-800-272-3900

Sorry you are dealing with 'this'.

H1235

Depression is so tough. In my experience medication is started at a small dose then after a month if that is not effective it is increased again then again. If it’s determined the medication is not right for her the dose is decreased slowly then stopped and a new medication is started and the whole process starts all over again. It is very time consuming. If she is switching facilities that often is she keeping the same doctor (my mom’s doctor is through the AL). Without a consistent doctor who knows her, it my be even harder to get medication dialed in.

mlenny

she has had depression for 30 years so we have dealt with meds back and forth. She’s had a couple different psychiatrists, but honestly she doesn’t ever remember meeting them. We just haven’t figured out the right place for her originally she lived in a different state so we had no idea how bad she had gotten. When we moved her near us, we moved her to IL. After a year, we had to move her to AL because she was consistently not taking her meds. About four months into AL she went into a severe depression and wouldn’t come out of it and her only options were memory care or psychiatric hospital so we chose MC and then she got better and asked us if she could move to AL and we complied and now we’re six months back into assisted living and she hates it and she’s had multiple depression episodes. And I don’t think she showers that often, doesn’t do activities, hates the food. She tells me she showers every day but I know she’s lying to me.