Toddler comparison

Karen-luvsumer

This is a rant. I’ve been caring for my DH who has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s nearly 3 years ago which was at least 2 years after I had been begging for a diagnosis. When someone compares caring for a spouse with Alzheimer’s is like caring for a toddler I want to scream. It is such a dismissive comment for the person with Alzheimer’s and a condescending comment for the care taker. It’s dismissive for the person with Alzheimer’s because it doesn’t acknowledge the person they currently are or the one they once were. It’s dismissive and condescending for the caregiver because it implies that they lack the where with all to deal with a toddler or that it’s that simple. Most caregivers have dealt with toddlers somewhere in their past and have developed some skills for managing situations. Believe me, if those skills would work they would use them. I have worked with toddlers in my paid career and I would take 5 toddlers on their worse day rather than someone with Alzheimer’s. A person with Alzheimer’s is more physically capable, stronger, has delusions, hallucinations, can be more creative and destructive. So please, don’t try to placate me with that comment. What you could say which would be more appreciated would be, What can I do to help? , I’m here for you. What do you need? Anything but, it’s like caring for a toddler!