Mom forgets that Dad has passed

dschafer

We helped my mom move from her home of over 45 years into a retirement community last December. I'd say she's in Stage 5 of Alzheimer's, but still in independent living. She doesn't love it and hasn't embraced being around other people, mostly because she knows her memory is not good. She recently started forgetting suggesting that she doesn't know why Dad "put" her in this apartment and left her there. Dad passed away back in 2005. I know in some cases it's best not to remind someone that a person has died. It can't be better to let her believe that her husband has left her, though. I try to carefully guide her back to remembering why he isn't around, but I'm just not sure what is least painful. Any suggestions?

SusanB-dil

Hi dschafer - welcome to 'here', but sorry for the reason.

A lot of folks use the fiblet that their partner is away on business. Is your mom realizing this move is permanent? Depends on how your mom sees the situation, but you could tell her the house is having repairs. That could help, but again, depends on your mom, and how far along she actually is.

M1

I think this is pretty common, but how to handle it may vary depending on your mother's temperament. My partner repeatedly forgets that her parents and sister have died, but it doesn't upset her to be corrected/reminded. Probably a judgement call.