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Living with Alzheimer's - A Caregiver's Journey
My wife was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's eight years ago when she was just 60 years old. I have been her primary caregiver every day since then until her death last month. As a means to help me cope with this terrible disease I wrote a detailed journal of my experience over that entire time. The writing is in two…
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What has changed in a year and a half
Greetings all. In September 2023, I moved both my parents into my home. My dear mom has Alzheimer's. My dear dad has mild cognitive impairment. They are 85 and 87 respectively. For more background, see the discussion at https://alzconnected.org/discussion/64542/moving-my-folks-into-my-house#latest btw - I copied and pasted…
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Whom do I believe? My Mom or the caretaker?
Hi Everyone! I'm new to this community. This is my first post. My Dad passed away last fall and I had to take over as my Mom's caretaker. She has dementia and I am her POA and only living relative who is able and willing to take care of her. I have been very overwhelmed taking care of my Mom since my Dad died, especially…
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Thank Your Past Self
Please take a moment and think about something you did in the past, that makes your present situation better. When I started caring for my parents, as I began each visit, I made a new note on my phone. It was always titled Thank You! Each time I benefited from one of my past actions, I put a hash tag on my note. For…
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Advice for Going Back to Work
I took FMLA for a year to assist with the new diagnosis of Alzheimers for my mom. It was intermittent FMLA so while I still worked, I was able to take off for appointments, my own mental health, and days that seemed like my mom just needed someone to be with her. I was averaging about 20 hours a week rather than my full 40…
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Not sure what to do.
Im taking care of my grandma who has been diagnosed with dementia, i started taking care of her since i turned 18, this really wasn’t a choice for me but im here and im trying my best everyday however there are things that are popping up making it difficult for me to care for her and i need help, she argues all the time i…
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Overwhelmed? It is the loved ones of those with Alzheimer's who bear the greatest burden.
It is the loved ones of those with Alzheimer's who bear the greatest burden, and often care for them at the expense of their own well-being. It is common for family members and loved ones to find themselves thrust into this nightmare completely unprepared and ill-equipped for it. Sadly, much will be damaged or completely…
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Feel Lost, Need Advice with Mom's Dementia/Alzheimers, Living and Depression
Mom was diagnosed 3 years ago with dementia. We believe she is about 5 - 6 years into it though. She also has severe depression, diagnosed 30 years ago. She is in an AL, but absolutely hates the place. This is her 4th home in 3 years, and the smallest so far (IL, AL, MC, AL). She is again in a severe depression, they seem…
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Not taking it well...
Hi, I am totally new to this...writing and my husband behavior. I also have a hard time with sharing about our life but my daughter told me...mom find some group for your self I can't help you. My husband developed sings of dementia last year in february which we didn't noticed right away. It has been getting slowly…
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Losing/hiding things
Mom (87) was recently diagnosed and declining rapidly. I’ve been staying with her and dad for extended periods of time to help while she adjusts to new meds. She doesn’t recognize items around the house-cooking utensils, her own clothes, linens, food in the cabinets/refrigerator and I have many times “claimed” them as mine…
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Worried about return to workplace
I don't know if I'm the only one here who is a Fed. But now with the return to the workplace my sister and I are scrambling trying to figure out the best way someone can be with mom during the day that is affordable. Everything is so stressful with the info coming from above changing daily - sometimes hourly. I don't know…
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Social security disability claim denied
UPDATE 2/20/25: the local office was closed because of a snow storm (no more working from home I guess) so we called the national line and waited on hold for 2 hours (yes that’s right, can’t wait to see if AI decreases wait times in the future) just to find out that the person on the phone didn’t seem to be able to find…
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Eating and eating and eating
I know this topic can’t only be something that I’m dealing with. Some background here my fiancé and myself moved in with his grandfather a year ago whose health had deteriorated tremendously in the previous year. I thought we would be temporary until he got back on track. Well I decided to remove my blinders about 2 months…
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Medicare and Leqembi
Hi! Anyone out there on Leqembi and have Medicare? My wife is on Leqembi and just turned 65 and signed up for original Part A and B Medicare. We’re wondering how much Medicare pays for Leqembi? And how much is left over for the patient to pay? The first few infusions were given when she was still on my BCBS insurance. So…
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Primary Care partner having trouble getting sibling help
New to all of this, and just looking for some support. Mom (75f) been on cognitive decline for several years and recently diagnosed with dementia. I (43F) have recently moved back home to help care for both her and Dad (80M). It can be A LOT. I'm having a hard time controlling my frustration with a siblings who just can't…
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Expectations of Employed Caregivers
My wife is stage 5-6 AD and at home. She is mobile, can communicate, although usually not correctly, still uses utensils to eat, is not incontinent, enjoys social time with others (not so much with me but that is not unexpected), exhibits confusion, anxiety and agitation. Medication has helped with the agitation and…
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Overwhelmed? It is the loved ones of those with Alzheimer's who bear the greatest burden.
It is the loved ones of those with Alzheimer's who bear the greatest burden, and often care for them at the expense of their own well-being. It is common for family members and loved ones to find themselves thrust into this nightmare completely unprepared and ill-equipped for it. Sadly, much will be damaged or completely…
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From Maybe to Reality
DH in ES thought. Then, several episodes of mis-rememering, including asking our adult son if he remembered a certain episode from his (DH's) youth. For the past 3 weeks he has been just fine, more or less, just the occasional lost word. In my mind I knew he still had Alz, but it just seemed like , well, maybe it will be a…
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In need of support
Hi all, I’m new here, and new to supporting someone with dementia. The long and short is, my aunt has dementia. We haven’t been close, and I hadn’t seen or heard from her much in 30 years. I reconnected with her about 1.5 years ago and she was mostly lucid. She was determined to move to Colorado with me and my kids as she…
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I wrote this essay to help others after losing my father to a long battle with Alzheimer's.
After losing my father to a long battle with Alzheimer's, I wrote this essay to help people navigate through the devastating journey of having a loved one with Alzheimer's, because it is the family and those closest to the individual with the disease who bear the greatest burden. Most people find themselves thrust into…
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Arguments that seem impossible to stop
Hi, alright I am new on this and taking care of my 72 year old mother. Are there any simple ways to get a person with dementia to stop arguing? Once my mother gets mad it seems impossible to get her to even attempt to think of something different. She likes to just make it seem like I have ruined her entire life and no…
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Did I Give Up Too Soon?
Following a violent outburst (mom attacked her in home caregiver) when she had a UTI, I made the difficult decision to place mom in MC. Tomorrow will be 2 weeks. She is more lucid than the other residents in her MC, but 'loops' verbally a lot, and it is clear that there's significant decline within the past 3 months. I am…
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Timeline
Took my mom to her appointment on Thursday and we were given an estimate of how long we have with her and I just don’t believe it. She still walks and talks. Yes, she needs care with showing and toileting and only sometimes how to eat. But has so much personality still. Has anyone ever got an estimate and how accurate was…
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Female spouse w/young kids looking for mom in similar situation?
I'd love to find a caregiver like myself to exchange texts with, like our own mini support group. This is likely too specific, but ideally it would be a woman whose partner is in the early stages of Alzheimer's (like, very very early stages where most people can't tell) and whose kids are still living at home (our kids are…
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Supporting both parents
Both my parents (79 and 78) live with us in their own attached apartment. My mom (79) is in the very early stages and is still very active. My dad is struggling with her memory changes and becomes angry and frustrated with her. I am looking for how best to support my dad wand how best to support myself as we navigate this…
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I wrote this essay to help others after losing my father to a long battle with Alzheimer's.
After losing my father to a long battle with Alzheimer's, I wrote this essay to help people navigate through the devastating journey of having a loved one with Alzheimer's, because it is the family and those closest to the individual with the disease who bear the greatest burden. Most people find themselves thrust into…
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New Years Eve
How excited was I when we received an invitation to a NYE party from our Sailability Coordinator. I thought this will be great, they understand, we haven’t been out to a party for the last 4 years. When we arrived I noticed the table set for 6 that meant us, the hosts and another couple. We had perfectly cooked medium rare…
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Getting my mom to her doctor appointment
I made my mom a Neurology appointment on 1/13. My dad is worried that if she finds out she'll have a total breakdown. So far she doesn't seem to have gotten any notifications about it, but she likely will get a text and/or email reminder for it. If we can even make it to the appointment day without her finding out and…
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Hypnagogic hallucinations
My wife told me she's been having trouble when trying to fall asleep because she's seeing things like vivid scenes of people and something like static on an old TV. We did a Google search and it sounds like hypnagogic hallucinations. We haven't been able to find any connection with MCI or dementia. But this is something…