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Trying to Help my Mother with Memory Loss
Hello all, This is my first post. I am an only child and my parents live a 7 hour car drive away. Last year, I noticed that my mother was experiencing memory loss, but my father is in denial. Last May, I went up to visit and got her to see a neurologist. Her memory loss has gotten worse. She can't remember how many days…
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I'm so tired.
My great grandma recently moved in with me. I knew there would be an adjustment period, but months later the behavior is only getting worse. She doesn't ever sleep a full night and is just never happy. She is 94 and acts like the biggest diva. Almost like the entire would should be ready to serve her and nothing is ever…
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Flew home and found mom in self neglect
I am the youngest of 7, and my mother’s only girl. I’m the favorite and so I have the best relationship with her. My mom is 74, and I noticed something was wrong last year when she was showing some short term memory loss, not answering her phone, and making excuses to not fly to Colorado to visit her kids. Saying she was…
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On the advice of my therapist
I have a habit of minimizing or stuffing down feelings and emotions. My therapist has given me the assignment of telling someone about something I am struggling with. Not to look for a solution but as a way to validate the experience. And so… I have a great deal of resentment and a feeling of loss of self. DH was diagnosed…
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good options for in home care
My mom is in the advanced stages of vascular dementia and needs full time care. My sister was living with her as her daily care giver but she is now in the hospital with cancer. I’m staying with mom now but need help caring for her so I have time to work and take care of my own home. Facilities are too expensive and she…
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cross-post: looking to trade visits with someone in Nashville who's parent is in San Fran Bay
hi there this is my first post and I’m so grateful to be here and for this community. My dad has recently been diagnosed with mild cognitive decline though once he quit drinking, I’m hoping he gets that diagnosis revisited. I’m exploring alternatives to the horrific options that I see in terms of forcing him into memory…
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What do I tell Mom when she asks to go home?
Hello, I'm new here, and new to caring for my Mother who is middle stage with dementia. Long story short, my Dad was her primary care give until he passed away suddenly about 2 months ago. He hid from the family his illness (cancer) and the extent of Mom's dementia. I live out of state, so that was pretty easy for him to…
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Dementia vs stage 4 lung cancer - advice needed
For those who have experience being a caregiver for someone who has significant co-morbidities, could you help me understand how to address my MIL’s changing needs? MIL is almost 92. She has had lung cancer for 10 years. The oncologist believes the tumors are very slow growing due to two immunotherapy treatments 7 years…
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Help! Dealing with Mom wanting to go home
Mom has been in memory care for one month. She's asking to go home per usual, and I am following the points suggested to me to redirect, etc. My question is emotionally how do you deal with the guilt of it all? I am so sad, and just want to tell her the truth (of course, I won't..she's unable to process) but the feelings…
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Moving MWD To Indiana
Hi! My mom who lives in FL was diagnosed with ALZ in June 2023. It has progressed quickly that by December was confusing me with her deceased sister, missing medications, taking the next morning of meds after every nap, forgetting where my brother & I live etc. She lives alone in FL but has a boyfriend who comes over daily…
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How do I best help Mom, the caregiver?
Hello~ first post. My parents both turned 80 and Dad was officially diagnosed with stage 5 Alzheimer’s dementia the same week. His progression through early stages was very slow~ we’ve noticed little things for seven or so years~ but he had COVID in January, and the big slide began… I live 90 minutes away from them with my…
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Questions to be asking
I currently live out of state from my LO. They were recently diagnosed with EOA and from my research I believe that they are in early stage. I call every few days to check in on them. What are some questions that I might want to ask that can help me know how they are progressing through EOA? I know there are limitations…
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Life update on mama (60) and me (25)
Hi everyone! I realized it’s been 4 months since I last posted in here, after receiving so much love and support for my last post where I was just venting all my thoughts and feelings. My mom is doing really well, she’s about to be 60! And in a few months my spouse and I will celebrate our 1st wedding anniversary, so…
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Highly Paranoid MIL Refuses Help
New here, big venting coming up. Sorry and thanks: My 92yr old MIL has been getting consistently more symptomatic over the past few months. Her PCP called it "age-related dementia" and left it at that. She has since come to state that she's never visited that doctor (she was actually a patient for nearly two years) and is…
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Just sharing a moment of epiphany
So yesterday was a particularly frustrating morning with Mom. Angry about money and lying people, and all sort of nasty comments. I was having a very hard time keeping my compassion and my Ms Dementia glasses weren’t working! decided I needed to escape and went down to the beach to walk around and let tranquillity envelope…
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Overwhelmed
Hi everyone, I'm new to the group. I'm the caregiver to my husband who was diagnosed 4 years ago with MCI. Since then we have seen a neurologist and he is now at early onset Alzheimers. I'm feeling overwhelmed with things at this point. I just need to know that things will be OK.
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"lost in current time"?
Tam Cummings lists this as a late stage 5 characteristic. But I’m not quite sure what it means? Also, recently I’ve noticed that when MIL refers to “my family”, she always means her nuclear family as a child. Is this just an indication of her older memories being stronger than more recent memories? We had a recent…
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Catastrophic Reaction to pain
My mother, 83 , Mixed Dementia (Vascular & Alzheimers) mid to late stage, lives with me and has been Physically able to transfer and walk with a walker us to this point. However, she had a fall last week, and even though she didn't fracture her hip or pelvic area, she is reacting to the pain in such a severe and dramatic…
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Need advice--meds, good days, bad days, anticipatory grief
Hi, this is long but I don't know that it can be abbreviated. My mom is 86 and has been having symptoms of dementia for the past couple years. I don't know which kind she has because she has not been formally diagnosed by a neurologist. I suspect it is lewy body. Anyway, it has gotten really bad last November after having…
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I need help
Hi, I’m Janet. I take care of my husband with Alzheimer’s. I would really like to talk to someone going through the same things. He is in the moderate stage and is 77, I’m 73.
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Delusions, hallucinations or dreams?
MIL has had some relatively minor episodes of hallucination type incidents. Some were auditory (Do you hear the vacuum cleaner?). Some were visual (There were butterflies all over the wall.) And some felt more like confusion. (Yelling “hello, hello” because she thought someone was knocking at the door). But last night was…
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the long night
It's about 4:30AM here. My mom called me around 11 and I knew I needed to come over to keep her company and help. I've read the hospice book and this forum and my books and all that for months now, but seeing this in real life is obviously different. He might be in the actively dying stage now? Wasn't really expecting that…
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Wife refuses medical help
After 3-4 years of increasing memory loss, Finlay was able to get DW to her PCP (prescribed sertraline for anxiety) and neurophysiological testing. Diagnosed with presumptive AD but she is in denial and refuses further follow up. Related: about 12 months ago she began to not recognize me. Not sure what to do
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pain management and further progression
Hi friends, Things are progressing over here (as they always are). We have a low dose of morphine on board now. My dad's legs are extremely stiff and causing him pretty consistent pain, it appears. Brought this up to his hospice nurse when he visited last week and he said we should start morphine now, because once the pain…
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possibly transitioning to next stage?
Hi friends, It feels late at night even though it's 7:30PM here. Wanted to check-in about the kookiness we've had going on today. Some catch-up from the last couple of weeks: my dad might be starting to struggle with eating/using his hands. More confusion about how to do things (take pills, drink from straw). As he's…
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Mobility concern
Hello everyone. My mother is 75 years old and was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and vascular dementia officially in 2020. Lately, my mom has been needing more help with walking around the house. Last week, she fell in the bathroom; she was looking in the mirror and just fell backwards. I’ve also noticed that she leans to her…
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updates and checking in
Hi everyone, wanted to say hi and post a few updates since today is a wonky one over here. My mom has officially started her new job (still working from home) and I'm going into the law school twice a week for work. We've hired Brightstar so we have a sitter coming in the days I'm not here during work hours so my mom can…
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Mother gave my brother and sister-in-law POA and all legal powers but they don’t want to do anything
Hello all- I am new to this community. My mother is in the process of her diagnosis and it has been hell. She has been diagnosed with “Mild Cognitive Impairment” but the MRI shows severe damages from silent strokes. She failed her driver license exam because of 4 critical driving errors (1 CDE disqualifies you). She has…
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Online counseling for caregiver support and those dealing with a hoarder?
Hi all, new to the forum and appreciate that its here. Does anyone know of an online counselor for caregiver of family support - especially those dealing with lifelong hoarders? I prefer online/virtual sessions and timezone is not a concern. My Mom (72) has Alzheimers and I am her POA, Guardian and Trustee. She is highly…