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Just starting at assisted living
My brother and I finally moved our mom into an assisted living facility in his town where he's able to visit often. It was not an easy move and it wasn't something she wanted to do, but it needed to happen. At first, she called me every day once or twice (or more). Then, suddenly she stopped calling. I know the transition…
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Need to Move Mom from AL to MC
I moved Mom into AL in January after MUCH convincing and lies that it would only be for a few weeks. She went downhill when she arrived, had behavioral issues and was placed on an involuntary psych hold due to comments and behaviors she was exhibiting. Her medications were adjusted and she is now settling in, but due to…
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Trying to convince a parent to move closer to her children
I have experience with a parent who denies that her memory problems are serious enough for her to need care. My siblings and I are trying to be as patient and supportive as we can; our mom lives with a friend who is aging, and her friend wants her to move out. However, she won't tell my mom that, and mom really doesn't…
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Wrong care facility??
My LO has always been overly sensitive and that seems to be getting worse as the disease progresses. She can't hear so the caregivers speak loudly. (She tells me that they yell at her all of the time) She's not always cognitively aware so the caregivers speak loudly to try to guide her. (She tells me that they yell at her…
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Long Distance caregiver soon temporary in-person/primary - advice?
Hello all! My mom (79) has moderate Alzheimer's. I live in another state with my husband and kids, but I will be in the role of fulltime caregiver temporarily in a couple weeks, because my Dad has to have a triple bypass and valve replacement. Mom can carry on conversations, but won't remember them - gets lost, needs help…
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Searching for a at home caregiver (6 hrs a week) for Denver
Hi-My mother has early ALZ and is presently being taking care of my by my competent brother and father, but they need support! I am a long-distance helper trying to find a great caregiver to come support 3-6 hrs a week but having trouble navigating the millions of options and would love a referral. Does anyone have someone…
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Venting
It's been 4 months since my mom moved here to my neck of the woods. She moved away from her home of 40 years, her things, her friends, the sunshine, warmth and the ocean. She was worried that when the time came, when dementia was in full swing and she was stuck in SC, she would be all alone. Yet, she's so very unhappy…
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Convincing LO to Move
New here and need help... 4 months ago, I came to my parent's house out of state thinking I was going to support my parents for a few weeks, working remotely, for my mom's knee replacement surgery. Long story short, I have been back home for 56 hours because my mother fell and fractured 4 ribs, contracted asymptomatic…
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Struggling with a solution
Hello everyone! My name is Michael. I live in South Carolina about 4 hours away from my parents. My mother has dementia and her cognitive decline has been rapid over the past few months. My father has health problems and hearing issues, but is able to take care of himself. However, my mother requires a lot of monitoring.…
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How to hold a conversation with a relative who has dementia?
I have a relative who was first diagnosed with dementia a few years ago and over the last few years I have noticed it is becoming increasingly difficult to maintain a two way conversations with her. I feel awkward about asking too many questions as I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable and she is quick to hang up the…
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Sister with dementia
My sister is 67 y/o and lives about 100 miles from me. My mother recently passed and I have been dealing with her ALZ the past few years. Although I have other siblings, it falls heavily on my shoulders. My sister lives alone in a smaller town. Her husband died in Jan 2022. Her son lives in San Antonio and actually has…
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New to mothers ALZ
Hello - I'm Erik and I have been holding so much emotion inside since my mom's formal diagnosis of ALZ. My family lived a very tumultuous life as a child leading to my parents always living a part. My mom went onto 3 ex-husbands in search of love, while raising 3 boys on her own. She found her prince of 20 years who is a…
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Nursing Support for Hospital Visits
Hi All! I'm new to this group. My sister has dementia we believe due to vascular system issues. She lives in a Memory Care facility. Recently, she's had some health issues with declined responsiveness. The facility sends her to the ER via ambulance. The issue is I'm in FL and she is in MO. It frightens me that she is going…
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Guilt of supporting from afar while other family members moved in
Hello, Grateful to find this community! Like me, I'm sorry we need to be here, but I'm relieved we can all lean on each other a bit. I live hours away from my Mom. We received results today from her neurologist about her brain health and he is of the opinion she has the early signs of Alzheimer's. We aren't surprised, but…
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How to handle difficult father who is caregiver to my mom with end stage dementia
Hey all, My mom with advanced alzheimers is still living at home with my father who is a psychiatrist, very conservative Christian, and strongly wanting to keep my mother at home as long as possible. My brother died last year so it is just my sister and I trying to support while being states away. We offered for years…
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Trying to help from out of state and feel like I'm drowning.
First of all, I'm very relieved to have found this resource. I have so many questions and worries, and many sleepless nights over the last couple weeks. I have a stepmother who was diagnosed with early stage Alzheimer's awhile back, so I think it's likely progressed since then (probably stage 4 now if I had to guess). I…
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How to Cope with Guilt
Background - I am a remote caregiver. I live short plane ride away but on a different island than my parents. My mom was diagnosed with vascular dementia in 2016 (7 years) ago and she is in stage 6. She lives with my dad and they're both in their 80's. I am married with two kids. I have my onw business and volunteer on two…
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Help finding a doctor for my mother
Hello. This is my first time on this forum. I am a daughter starting to support my mother who is showing signs of cognitive loss. I live out of state from her and need advice on how to find a good medical provider for her to see to get a diagnosis and start treatments.
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how to proceed with parent's care, disagreements within the family
Hello all, I'm new here and am in need of advice/support from others who understand what it’s like to care for a parent. My mother (60y/o) has been dealing with memory loss since 2019, she was diagnosed with mild cognitive decline at the time and has advanced significantly since. We are working with doctors to get an…
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Wants to be Left Alone
My 75-year-old mom was diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment consistent with Alzheimer's about two years ago. I live six hours away and have two young kids (1 and 4), so I can't be there to keep an eye on her aside from brief visits once or twice a year surrounding doctor's appointments. My sister is estranged and my…
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Help! Handling hyper chatter..?!
Hello, brave caregiver! This issue is hardly the worst thing that Dementia has to offer, but I can’t seem to find communication tips that cover it! I don’t know how how to talk to, or even around, my dad! He and my mom (87 & 86) are together in memory care. Her dementia appears pretty minor, but my dad has no short term…
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Managed debit card?
Curious to know if anyone has found a debit card option that allows for limits managed by someone (me). For instance, Chase First Banking is a debit card for kids, but it's limited to ages 6-17. Does such a thing exist for an elder parent that could be managed by the child—setting limits on where and how much the…
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Managing care long-distance
I could use some advice. My mom, who is 81 years old, is in stage 4, borderline stage 5. She still lives at home in MA with my dad, also 81. I live in VA and manage all of their finances, medical, house related items, etc. I fly home every 4-6 weeks for doctor appointments, house cleaning, hair cuts, laundry, etc. since my…
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Moving to Fl to be near mom's memory care facility?
My mom has been in a memory care facility in Florida for over 3 years. The dementia continues to take its toll on her mentally but aside from breaking her hip she's in good physical shape. I manage things from NYC and go down for 4 days at least once a month. In addition to the staff she has a private aide during her…
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How do you know when it's time to move parent into Assisted Living?
My mother lives in another state with her partner of over 30 years and has early to mid-stage dementia. Her partner has expressed that he can't take caring for anymore (and is often angry with her and also has severe anxiety and depression) but when I suggest that I can move her down to assisted living in FL to be near me…
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Completely lost
My dad is in middle stages of Alzheimer’s and currently living in Abilene, tx with stepmom. I have 4 kids and grand baby on the way, currently living Weatherford, tx .2 hours away. My stepmom has recently decided to come out of retirement and actually take on more work that requires monthly travel, sometimes more, while…
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Welcome! New Forum for Caregivers
This is a new discussion forum for caregivers supporting someone living with Alzheimer's or dementia from a distance. Perhaps you live in a different city or state.