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Therapeutic Lie #2
Hi everyone! This is kind of a continuation of my last post. I am trying to get my mom (60 with ALZ) in to an adult day care program, and it did not go well. Well, we didn't even get to the day care place. I took all of your guys' advice about saying it's a place where I volunteer at and have some friends I want her to…
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Alzheimer's/Alcohol Dementia, Alcoholism, Hoarding and Medication Refusal - what to do?
Hello, My mom has been a lifelong alcoholic who has refused most medical care in her life. She lost her home, was asked to leave her independent living situation due to hoarding, and she is in assisted living now for the last week but seems to have declined. She is physically weak, uses a walker, and is essentially blind…
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DH is still very capable, but I am focusing on the diagnosis which frustrates him
My DH and I have been to a few doctor appointments and have been told he has some form of dementia. We're waiting on a couple more tests (hearing & sleep) before a follow-up appointment with the geriatric dementia specialist. DH says he just wants to live life and enjoy it as best he can. He admits he has memory issues -…
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Mom is hitting; is it reasonable to expect an action plan?
I'm new here, struggling to find some info so any help is appreciated! - also, sorry for how long this is. Last fall, my sister and I convinced our dad to put Mom in memory care. She's advanced enough that she can't manage personal hygiene or communicate her needs effectively. Mom has this fun thing where she often has…
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Another outburst...doctor suggests new drug...MC
I am just sharing because it helps me to get this off my chest. My DH had another outburst on Thursday night which was truly frightening. My one interest that takes me out of the house is rehearsal for a musical group I belong to, which happens each Thursday evening. Since myself, my DDIL and DS are all a bit afraid of…
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Competely overwhelmed and in tears or on the verge of tears ALWAYS
Hi all! I'm new here. My 59 yo DH was diagnosed with early onset alzheimer's and primary progressive aphasia in Sept 2020. He was able to continue working until Dec of 22. He's been home and frustrated and bored and angry since then. He gets so confused and believes things that haven't happened. Sees things and people do…
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Memory care fears
I have had my stage 6 DH on waiting lists for two small residential memory care homes. I just got word that one of them is likely to have an opening in two months or so. Immediately my fears skyrocketed about whether my husband will think I have betrayed him when I have him move. He is cognizant in the moment but doesn't…
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Changing Assisted Living Communities - VENT
Hi everyone. I'm new here and I am in the process of exploring the different discussions posted. I appreciate all of the information everyone has shared. It helps me to feel like we are in this together. I wanted to get some things off my chest and I didn't know where else to go. I am an only daughter and I care for my…
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lost
Hi I am new to ALZCONNECTED im not sure where to start. my mom has been diagnose with AlZ. she currently lives with my dad, but my dad is having a really difficult time accepting her diagnosis. he is not willing to educate himself about the disease and has no patience for my mom. he keeps saying he can't go through with…
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Fed up from the life.
Previously i posted about me feeling that i am forgetting things and losing my memory. I don't remember any happy memories seems they are somewhere in the dark and as much as i know I had many happy memories with kids, family and with the person I love. I am in love with a person, i am going through many things, having…
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DW keeps trying to leave the house and walk away
DW has advance dementia. Lately she has opened the doors of our home and walked up the street toward the main road. When I follow here she won't return of even talk to me except to say No every time I talk to her. Twice now, I've had to call me son to come over and talk to her and he has been able, with much effort, to…
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Trust is gone..
I'm just kind of thinking about our relationship because it's Valentine's Day. After his outbursts of screaming and throwing objects last week, as well as telling me he's going to "leave me" I'm not sure what to believe. This week is a whole different ball game with multiple requests that I forgive him. I do forgive him…
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Tips for dealing with some issues I am having with my FIL (85)
Hello, I am primary caregiver during the day for my father-in-law who has been dealing with memory issues 10 years, diagnosed with Alzheimers 2 years ago. And Jennifer previous post about this being hard is on point. I am getting frustrated bc he can't control his bladder at night and I am washing sheets every day. He is…
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Unconditional vs Obligation
The apple certainly doesn't fall far from the tree. I simply can't cope with caring for her personal challenges and then all of the other incidentals- bills, wills and care for example. I've been managing her bills, finances, doctors visits, care for 5+ years. Has it been easy, no. Has it been emotionally manageable, yes.…
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My Mean Mom Doesn’t Want to be here
My 83 yo mom has had signs of dementia going on 10 years. She was officially diagnosed last year. Why so long? My brother couldn’t fit into his schedule to get her examined during the last 5 years she lived with him. Prior to that we weren’t really sure it was dementia, she was still reasonably normal just lost things…
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Mom thinks she still works - she doesn't.
First- THANK YOU for any response. I am the eldest daughter, and my father is the primary caregiver of my Mom who has been officially diagnosed with Amnestic MCI (doc suspects we are heading into early stage AD.) Mom is starting a new trend of getting ready for work each morning and telling my Dad that she is going into…
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Need good geriatric psychiatrist/neurologist NWDC/Md
DH with Alzheimer's recently placed in MC. Began exhibiting angry aggressive behavior at night. I want total review of treatment options, not just short term tranquilizer. Help!
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Paranoia, delusion, hallucination and aggression
My mom with early onset Alzheimer is turning 69 next week. In the last two months, things take a drastic turn as she started with less engage with us turning into full delusion and hallucination all awake hours. There is no redirect or reassuring technique to help as she is not engaging with us. She turns physical and…
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Angry forever?
My moms delusions and anger have become so taxing that our family feels like it may be time for full time care but she’s voiced she doesn’t want to go to a nursing home and “nothings wrong” with her. I KNOW she’s going to be irate with everyone. My question is, do you have experience with this and was your loved one angry…
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Mom doesn't want to be cared for
Hi, My name is Stephanie and live near Albuquerque, NM. I'm new to this forum and dealing with dementia in general. I recently brought my 81-year-old German mom to the US as she cannot care for herself anymore (middle? stage of Alzheimer/Dementia). Back in Germany, she was hospitalized twice in Aug and Oct 23 and the…
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LO Actively Refuses to Socialize
Hi everyone! I hope you all had very happy holidays, and a happy new year! My mama (diagnosed with early stage Alzheimer's) has always been a social butterfly. However, due to Covid-19 and her diagnosis, has become quite sheltered. I've been told multiple times how socializing is key for a person with Alzheimer's/Dementia…
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Feeling Conflicted and Guilty about moving on…
My wife is in the mid to later stages of AZ and is struggling to communicate, she sits quietly most of the time. In addition to AZ she has a genetic eye defect that is incurable, she is legally blind and needs help with everything. I am her caregiver and have given up most of my exercise and outdoor activities to support…
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clashing with sibling this Christmas over COVID risks
My mom is in the moderate stages of AD, still living with my father but it is increasingly difficult with her behavior and level of confusion. They are 60+ years married, in their 80s, and my father is mom's primary caregiver (burdened by her care needs). I recently moved them to be closer to me (only daughter and youngest…
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Primary Care (PC) Doctor is Undermining the Neurologist
Because Alzheimers runs significantly in my mother's family (killed my grandmother and three of her sisters), I knew as soon as I started seeing tale tell signs in my mother I knew what was happening. After many, many months I finally convinced her to see a neurologist. So I asked her doctor for recommendations for a…
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Caregiving mixed with trauma from parents’ marriage
My parents have been unhappily married for four decades. Essentially, they hate each other, which I view as a foundational trauma of my life—that they remain married I mean. My mother has what seems to be stage 6 dementia and right now, by necessity, my father is the primary caretaker. He’s worked hard at being patient and…
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Anger and aggression
I'm a newbie to this forum. My 85 yo mom, diagnosed with Alz a couple years ago, lives with my sister in another state. She often has angry outbursts that are stressing my sister out. My mom has also had lifelong depression, probably bi-polar. My brother and I are both doing as much as we can from a distance, and my…
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Go Home Gone wrong
have not posted for a while, spouse with moderate dementia, diagnosed two yeas ago. 11/6 somewhat normal day, trip to the store for bananas, daughter and grand kids visited to jump in leaf pile, spent more than normal amount of time out doors. had a great time. around 4PM I was taking the dog for pre dinner walk, when she…
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New(ish) Diagnosis and EOAD
Hello, I am a 48 year old wife whose 58 year old husband has recently been diagnosed with dementia. We are awaiting PET scan and more testing (always more testing) for a "type" of dementia. We have 2 children (21 and 18) that are in college. I started noticing symptoms a year ago, and then in February of this year he had…
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How to communicate with a parent in denial
Hello! Rather abruptly it has become clear my mom will need to be in MC for at least the immediate short term, or even longer. She had an episode of delirium after attempting to travel solo to a family member, and while she has largely recovered, her baseline is way worse than before this episode. She was released from the…
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Won’t Go to the Dr./won’t get an assessment
I am curious what ideas people have for facilitating an assessment for someone who probably understands that something is going on, but refuses to go to the doctor, and likely doesn’t want to do that because she is aware an assessment would happen. (the phrase - “you are trying to commit me has come up quite a bit…